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Okay, grab your torches and light your pitchforks or anything, but I may have lied a little in the title. Fear not, fellow freaks! My goal today (and hopefully yours, after finished reading) is that we can all collaborate on the subject.
Disclaimer-ish: I have included links to relevant topics below, if you are so inclined to delve a little deeper as I have. If you don’t want sex- and fetish-related articles in your history, I would advise against opening them, but you’re already on Blue Moon, so I’m sure you guys are safe from... yeah, sex and fetish stuff. Also, please keep in mind that this thread is (mostly) based off of research, while including some of my own opinions, musings, and conclusions. I’d be more than happy to hear of whatever argument you may summon against whatever it is you disagree with or wish to discuss more thoroughly. That’s what this post is all about! Well, partially.
An Intro to the Perverse of Mind
That is to say, I wanted the chance to discuss sexual quirks and kinks. Specifically the psychology and possible reasoning behind them. It's something I've always been interested in, and, when given the chance (while doing my best not invading anyone's personal bubble), I will talk about sex and sexuality with friends. Sometimes even ask them of their own sexual preferences! It's purely out of curiosity and in no way influences how I treat them, that much is (hopefully) obvious. I've been an inhabitant of the deep, dark corners of the internet for too long to be judgemental of what gets someone hot and bothered. If anything, it strengthens the bonds of friendship! Like learning about their favorite animal or favorite food! Ahem. I digress.
Knowing what someone's favorite freaky fetishes are is in no way a means of understanding that fetish. Unless, of course, it's one of your own, too. Even then you may not understand it yourself. Perhaps you've never contemplated where it originated from, or what exactly it was that had drawn you to it in the first place. Well, buttercup, guess what we’re here to do today!
Schools of Thought in Regards to Origins of Arousal
I think can safely assume that most fetishes on the more “vanilla” side of the spectrum can be put under a few easily understandable categories, not all of which are included here. Instead are a few examples that I have gathered: evolution, conditioning, or cross-wiring.
Obviously evolution plays what is arguably the biggest part of what determines what we find sexually appealing. Breasts, butts, bodytypes, ethnicity, anything that one may be drawn to in an aesthetic sense to best determine a healthy, fertile partner to produce equally (or superiorly!) healthy offspring. That much is simple. We learned it in high school sex ed. Or biology. Or both.
Conditioning is what most researchers believe to be the origins of fetishes. Essentially, certain experiences imprint upon your psyche at a young age (five or six years old sort of young) that will later develop into sexual preference as you bloom into a beautiful, sex-crazed flower. Hell, before I was even ten years old I had my toys interact with one another in ways that would be serious cause for concern, had my parents seen me mashing them together in obscene ways. I knew what doing the dirty do was before I even... well, knew what it was. Other researchers argue that development occurs in adolescence. Perhaps a combination of both! Sexual attraction can even be developed even later on with the right dose of conditioning.
Speaking of childhood, Sigmund Freud would also be pressed to mention the Oedipus complex, in which children manifest the desire to “sexually possess” the parent of the opposite sex. This could weigh into the argument that we look for partners that physically and/or mentally resemble our parents, or, in some cases, a taste for incest.
Just for science's sake, let's take a look at foot fetishes. As some of you may be aware, it's a common example for a scientific explanation of a fetish, or at least a... step... in the right direction. i'm not leaving
The infamous foot fetish has been studied for quite some time, now. Feet/footwear have earned the reputation for the most sexualized body part/objects that don't directly correlate with genitals. Scientifically, it has been noted that the bits of your brain that identify feet and genitals are actually mapped next to each other and can, in some cases, be a tad cross-wired, and in one documented case has even caused orgasms through the foot. Yeah, you heard right. Neat, huh?
So, in short, it can be said that the underlying reason for foot fetishes is, essentially, your brain getting them confused with your genitals. Good job, brain.
What About Power?
The relation of power to sex is a fairly significant component of a person’s sexuality. Most individuals can identify as dominant, submissive, switch, or somewhere along a similar scale. Maybe even more extreme situations like predator versus prey. Or hey, some people may not consider themselves anywhere on the spectrum, that’s cool too. However, there are countless fetishes relevant to power (ones that adhere to humiliation or degradation) just as much as innocence (virginity, corruption, teenaged, etc). One might say that this aspect of sex can simply be traced back to evolution. Innocence could correlate to fertility and/or otherwise untouched territory, perhaps? Dominance is a desirable trait, no?
On that note, I love dominance. (Bear with me, I’m going somewhere.) It’s something that I might be able to shed a little light on and try to understand.
My Own Experience
I’m a switch. If I’m to be dominant, I want to be able to overpower someone who is otherwise stronger than me. Similarly, if I’m to be submissive, I want to kick and thrash and curse as wildly as my body can assert, and still not be able to break free. These examples can be literal or figurative. Basically, I want to overpower, or be overpowered. There’s no keeling over without a fight in the bedroom for me. At all.
Whether it’s to feel power in my hands, or to be under the influence of another person’s power, it’s hot. It makes me bite my lip and dig my nails into whatever’s near. I can only assume that this can be tied into the desire for dominance. I’ve also loved play fighting and rough-housing since I was a wee bab, and I’ve trained in martial arts for the better part of my life. Working up a sweat and getting handsy is just fun for me. And guess what? As soon as I hit puberty, I was still play fighting and rough-housing, and eventually, one wrestling match happened to be in my bed, then another, and another... Spend enough time rolling around in a bed, hormones are gonna intervene and suddenly the rolling takes a turn for the best.
I like being rough, and I like to be roughed up. Bam. Sexual origin story right there.
Schools of thought in relation to fetish origin aside, there are some fetishes that are, arguably, damn near impossible to explain. A random example (from my own preferences in hopes that I don’t step on too many toes) is stigmatophilia. In short, it’s an attraction to those who have been tattooed, pierced, and/or scarified, in some cases the genital region. Dudes with ear piercings? Girls with sleeve tattoos? Girls and boys with nipple piercings? My body is ready. But why is my body ready? Was it conditioning? Some deep-seeded subconscious desire for the painted canvas of a tastefully decorated body, in juxtaposition to my affiliation to the creation of art? Do I just really like shiny things? It could be all of the above!
Anyway, I’ve rambled on long enough.
In Summary
As far as I’ve gathered, most preferences and fetishes can only be identified on an individual basis. (This is most strongly prevalent in the BDSM community, I’ve noticed.) Everyone has different reasons why they’re drawn to something, and it’s very likely impossible to simplify it so narrowly as "People are aroused by these things and this is why. End of story." The human mind is a complex thing. I often relate sexuality and spirituality to one another, and I know that even though not everyone is conscious of it, they wouldn't disagree if they heard the two in the same context. And so, much like spirituality, it's all quite dependent on the person and their beliefs and way of life. There's no right or wrong, no final answer.
A final note; please keep it respectful, guys. I really feel that I shouldn’t have to say it, but I have encountered a few judgemental folk who really should have kept their trap shut. We’re here to explore the psychology of sex, not call each other weirdos.
We’re all weirdos anyway.
And so! I wanted to ask you, dear fellow perverts, what thoughts you may have on your own sexual preferences, or even others you have yet to understand. Or maybe you’re like me! And you’re here to sit back, and listen, hoping to learn something new from this vast source of perverts, fetishists and other unmentionables that you may have otherwise been ignorant of. What is your favorite fetish, and why do you think it’s your favorite? What about it arouses you so much? What fetishes are there that you just can’t seem to wrap your head around?
I hope to hear as many theories as you can share. Best of fuck to you all!
Okay, grab your torches and light your pitchforks or anything, but I may have lied a little in the title. Fear not, fellow freaks! My goal today (and hopefully yours, after finished reading) is that we can all collaborate on the subject.
Disclaimer-ish: I have included links to relevant topics below, if you are so inclined to delve a little deeper as I have. If you don’t want sex- and fetish-related articles in your history, I would advise against opening them, but you’re already on Blue Moon, so I’m sure you guys are safe from... yeah, sex and fetish stuff. Also, please keep in mind that this thread is (mostly) based off of research, while including some of my own opinions, musings, and conclusions. I’d be more than happy to hear of whatever argument you may summon against whatever it is you disagree with or wish to discuss more thoroughly. That’s what this post is all about! Well, partially.
An Intro to the Perverse of Mind
That is to say, I wanted the chance to discuss sexual quirks and kinks. Specifically the psychology and possible reasoning behind them. It's something I've always been interested in, and, when given the chance (while doing my best not invading anyone's personal bubble), I will talk about sex and sexuality with friends. Sometimes even ask them of their own sexual preferences! It's purely out of curiosity and in no way influences how I treat them, that much is (hopefully) obvious. I've been an inhabitant of the deep, dark corners of the internet for too long to be judgemental of what gets someone hot and bothered. If anything, it strengthens the bonds of friendship! Like learning about their favorite animal or favorite food! Ahem. I digress.
Knowing what someone's favorite freaky fetishes are is in no way a means of understanding that fetish. Unless, of course, it's one of your own, too. Even then you may not understand it yourself. Perhaps you've never contemplated where it originated from, or what exactly it was that had drawn you to it in the first place. Well, buttercup, guess what we’re here to do today!
Schools of Thought in Regards to Origins of Arousal
I think can safely assume that most fetishes on the more “vanilla” side of the spectrum can be put under a few easily understandable categories, not all of which are included here. Instead are a few examples that I have gathered: evolution, conditioning, or cross-wiring.
Obviously evolution plays what is arguably the biggest part of what determines what we find sexually appealing. Breasts, butts, bodytypes, ethnicity, anything that one may be drawn to in an aesthetic sense to best determine a healthy, fertile partner to produce equally (or superiorly!) healthy offspring. That much is simple. We learned it in high school sex ed. Or biology. Or both.
Conditioning is what most researchers believe to be the origins of fetishes. Essentially, certain experiences imprint upon your psyche at a young age (five or six years old sort of young) that will later develop into sexual preference as you bloom into a beautiful, sex-crazed flower. Hell, before I was even ten years old I had my toys interact with one another in ways that would be serious cause for concern, had my parents seen me mashing them together in obscene ways. I knew what doing the dirty do was before I even... well, knew what it was. Other researchers argue that development occurs in adolescence. Perhaps a combination of both! Sexual attraction can even be developed even later on with the right dose of conditioning.
Speaking of childhood, Sigmund Freud would also be pressed to mention the Oedipus complex, in which children manifest the desire to “sexually possess” the parent of the opposite sex. This could weigh into the argument that we look for partners that physically and/or mentally resemble our parents, or, in some cases, a taste for incest.
Just for science's sake, let's take a look at foot fetishes. As some of you may be aware, it's a common example for a scientific explanation of a fetish, or at least a... step... in the right direction. i'm not leaving
The infamous foot fetish has been studied for quite some time, now. Feet/footwear have earned the reputation for the most sexualized body part/objects that don't directly correlate with genitals. Scientifically, it has been noted that the bits of your brain that identify feet and genitals are actually mapped next to each other and can, in some cases, be a tad cross-wired, and in one documented case has even caused orgasms through the foot. Yeah, you heard right. Neat, huh?
So, in short, it can be said that the underlying reason for foot fetishes is, essentially, your brain getting them confused with your genitals. Good job, brain.
What About Power?
The relation of power to sex is a fairly significant component of a person’s sexuality. Most individuals can identify as dominant, submissive, switch, or somewhere along a similar scale. Maybe even more extreme situations like predator versus prey. Or hey, some people may not consider themselves anywhere on the spectrum, that’s cool too. However, there are countless fetishes relevant to power (ones that adhere to humiliation or degradation) just as much as innocence (virginity, corruption, teenaged, etc). One might say that this aspect of sex can simply be traced back to evolution. Innocence could correlate to fertility and/or otherwise untouched territory, perhaps? Dominance is a desirable trait, no?
On that note, I love dominance. (Bear with me, I’m going somewhere.) It’s something that I might be able to shed a little light on and try to understand.
My Own Experience
I’m a switch. If I’m to be dominant, I want to be able to overpower someone who is otherwise stronger than me. Similarly, if I’m to be submissive, I want to kick and thrash and curse as wildly as my body can assert, and still not be able to break free. These examples can be literal or figurative. Basically, I want to overpower, or be overpowered. There’s no keeling over without a fight in the bedroom for me. At all.
Whether it’s to feel power in my hands, or to be under the influence of another person’s power, it’s hot. It makes me bite my lip and dig my nails into whatever’s near. I can only assume that this can be tied into the desire for dominance. I’ve also loved play fighting and rough-housing since I was a wee bab, and I’ve trained in martial arts for the better part of my life. Working up a sweat and getting handsy is just fun for me. And guess what? As soon as I hit puberty, I was still play fighting and rough-housing, and eventually, one wrestling match happened to be in my bed, then another, and another... Spend enough time rolling around in a bed, hormones are gonna intervene and suddenly the rolling takes a turn for the best.
I like being rough, and I like to be roughed up. Bam. Sexual origin story right there.
Schools of thought in relation to fetish origin aside, there are some fetishes that are, arguably, damn near impossible to explain. A random example (from my own preferences in hopes that I don’t step on too many toes) is stigmatophilia. In short, it’s an attraction to those who have been tattooed, pierced, and/or scarified, in some cases the genital region. Dudes with ear piercings? Girls with sleeve tattoos? Girls and boys with nipple piercings? My body is ready. But why is my body ready? Was it conditioning? Some deep-seeded subconscious desire for the painted canvas of a tastefully decorated body, in juxtaposition to my affiliation to the creation of art? Do I just really like shiny things? It could be all of the above!
Anyway, I’ve rambled on long enough.
In Summary
As far as I’ve gathered, most preferences and fetishes can only be identified on an individual basis. (This is most strongly prevalent in the BDSM community, I’ve noticed.) Everyone has different reasons why they’re drawn to something, and it’s very likely impossible to simplify it so narrowly as "People are aroused by these things and this is why. End of story." The human mind is a complex thing. I often relate sexuality and spirituality to one another, and I know that even though not everyone is conscious of it, they wouldn't disagree if they heard the two in the same context. And so, much like spirituality, it's all quite dependent on the person and their beliefs and way of life. There's no right or wrong, no final answer.
A final note; please keep it respectful, guys. I really feel that I shouldn’t have to say it, but I have encountered a few judgemental folk who really should have kept their trap shut. We’re here to explore the psychology of sex, not call each other weirdos.
We’re all weirdos anyway.
And so! I wanted to ask you, dear fellow perverts, what thoughts you may have on your own sexual preferences, or even others you have yet to understand. Or maybe you’re like me! And you’re here to sit back, and listen, hoping to learn something new from this vast source of perverts, fetishists and other unmentionables that you may have otherwise been ignorant of. What is your favorite fetish, and why do you think it’s your favorite? What about it arouses you so much? What fetishes are there that you just can’t seem to wrap your head around?
I hope to hear as many theories as you can share. Best of fuck to you all!
