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A Questionable Excuse

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mrow

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Jan 9, 2009
( Didn't know what to name itttt. So I'm just thinking in the future when Julian's trying to make excuses for seeing his new friend. ;D )

Hn.

A soft sigh left the boy's lips as he pulled himself up from the grass. It was later in the day, about an hour after school and his boyfriend would no doubt be wondering where he had gotten to. Julian usually went over there directly after school, so today was a bit of an exception. And he knew he'd probably hear about it in a bit when he headed over to the other's apartment. How much his boyfriend was worried for him, how afraid he'd been. All of that. It was really just to be expected. That's what caring people did to their partners, right?

At least it was all Julian was used to. They'd been dating a little under a year, and he'd never been with anyone else before. He was only 16 of course. The boy stretched his thin limbs, running a hand through his auburn hair that fell in layers just below his ears. He straightened out his skinny jeans and ruffled at the hood behind his neck to straighten it out. He didn't want his boyfriend thinking he'd been doing anything with anyone, with his clothes all rearranged. Really, he'd just gotten smaller for them and they didn't fit as well. He'd just taken a nap in his back yard was all.

In just moments he was treading down the street to his boyfriend's apartment. It was only about a mile away. He stopped at the front door and let his green eyes trace over the handle. His thin fingers reached out for the handle and he didn't even bother knocking before he stepped in, collapsing on the couch, but in a graceful way. "Hello?" He asked, glancing around.
 
Dylan crossed his arms tightly as he paced across the hardwood floor. Back and forth, one foot in front of the other; the sound that his perfectly polished dress shoes made was… ominous at best. As the clicks became sharper and faster, Dylan’s nerves became more frayed. Where was he? His boyfriend should have been through that door over forty minutes ago. Five minutes: that was okay, maybe even ten minutes was acceptable. Hell, being a nice guy, Dylan would have accepted fifteen. But one it got to the half an hour mark; there was no excuse for that. There was really only one explanation. Julian was trying to keep something from him.

As for what it could have been; he had no idea. Well… he had ideas, but they were paranoid, kind of crazy ideas. In an attempt to calm himself, the 19 year old boy sat down at his kitchen counter and pulled open the bottom drawer. One small shot of whiskey was all it took to calm his nerves just a bit, and it was definitely enough to keep him from going out, finding Julian, and carrying him towards the house. After all, Julian was a thin, weak boy, and Dylan was a strong, rather formidable young man. His loose slacks and slightly too-tight polo only made this fact more obvious.

As the front door opened, and Julian walked in, Dylan waited a few minutes before standing up and moving towards the couch. His anger had not completely gone away, but it was there, festering beneath the alcohol, burning it away and leaving nothing but the bitter taste. He leaned over the back of the furniture, his jet black hair framing his face as he looked down on his boyfriend. “Hey,” He greeted Julian half-heartedly, “What took you so long?” He straightened and walked to the other side of the sofa, pulling the other boy up roughly by the arm.
 
If Julian knew just how much Dylan was freaking out, he would have headed straight to the other's apartment. At least, he was quite sure he would have. Really, not getting there right on time was hardly worth it today. What had he done? Napped on the lawn. Really, was that worth Dylan being angry with him? Probably, actually. It was nice to have a little time to himself. Most of the time he was either at work or with his boyfriend. He didn't like being around his parents, who were both so judgmental of him... At least with Dylan he knew that his boyfriend loved him unconditionally.

Most of the time. If he didn't show up to the apartment late like this.

Julian knew that Dylan was angry when he waited before stepping over. Hell, he didn't even say a word when the boy sat down on the couch. So he sat there, pulling his legs a little closer to his body. He knew just what was going to happen. Well maybe not exactly. Dylan had only just started to become more physical. He hadn't done anything terrible. But considering that Julian had never done anything quite like this, showing up so late, he might expect something a little more.

"Dylan." He stood up quickly when the other pulled him up by the arm. The boy swallowed. Being as thin as he was, Dylan's hard grip like that could definitely give him bruises. "I was taking a nap." He tried to sound resolved in what he said, but it was hard knowing that his boyfriend was so angry with him. "At home." His green eyes looked up to Dylan hopefully. While he'd tried to sound certain, it didn't come out that way. There was a little shakiness to his voice, probably because of the grip on his arm.
 
Dylan’s grip on Julian’s arm became tighter. He could feel the bones in the other boy’s arm and rather than concern him; this only pissed him off more. Julian was obviously losing weight. And it definitely wasn’t for Dylan. They had been together a year, If he didn’t find his boyfriend attractive, he would have left him by now. So the question remained. Who was he trying to impress?

He had never been good enough for anyone. Dylan tensed at that thought. The second year Duke University student hadn’t been good enough for his exes, he hadn’t been good enough for MIT, he hadn’t even been good enough for his own parents. He didn’t try to fool himself now; he wasn’t good enough for Julian. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t be the perfect boyfriend. And so he had stopped trying months ago.

It had started with small insults and ‘the cold shoulder.’ Then it had turned into full out screaming matches; mostly one sided. But the smaller boy still hadn’t learned. He did tiny things that he knew where offensive or annoying. He acted like a complete faggot, moving in a girly way, talking like a woman, doing things to Dylan that made him fall even further in love with this person who was a boy. They did things that would have made his mother sick… and her son-of-a-bitch husband proud. And Julian didn't even care enough to keep it in his pants when another fag walked into the room.

Dylan pulled Julian up to meet his cold, steely gaze. “Whoever you were with; stay with him next time.” He shoved the other to the hard floor with as much force as he could muster. “The bastard deserves a cheap, ugly, slut like you.”
 
Julian should have been expecting as much. Dylan was so protective, he was only angry because he wanted to be sure that the smaller boy was okay... At least that was what Julian had brainwashed himself into thinking. The boy had once been completely independent, confident, and a strong thinker. Being with Dylan had changed him. Love changed him. He had fallen so hard for Dylan that he was even willing to sacrifice himself. His body, his personality, his indepedence...

Julian was about to speak when he was shoved roughly to the floor. It took the boy a few seconds to collect himself and pul himself into a sitting position, but when he did he looked up at Dylan almost spitefully. "I wasn't with anyone." He brushed his pants off to occupy himself. He really couldn't look at Dylan when he spoke back. "I was taking a nap." The boy tried to sound as resolved as possible. It was just waiting for a reaction now. "Why don't you trust me? You think I could slip in a fuck with 10 minutes? It take 20 to walk over here."

Now there was his spirit. This wasn't common, but sometimes his true feelings and anger did come out. It was very, very rare, because he was so afraid of losing Dylan with his disobedience.
 
Excuses excuses. That was all Julian ever had. And it was really starting to get annoying. Well… it had gotten annoying the first time, but now there were no words for the thoughts in Dylans mind. Love had changed him for the worse. It had made him softer and therefor it had made it easier for him to break. But since it was Julian’s fault that he had grown weaker, he would only break around Julian, the only one who would ever feel the true measure of how hurt and angry he really was at the world.

Dylan turned away, determined to ignore the pleas for forgiveness that he would undoubtedly hear soon enough. But this seemed to be one of those things that didn’t work the way he wanted them to. When he looked back after a moment of silence, the anger in Julian’s eyes broke him. And the boy’s words shattered him. “Fuck you,” He said quietly, the look on his face almost murderous. “Do you really think I’m that stupid?” A sharp kick from Dylan showed that the question was rhetorical. “Of course I don’t trust you” Another kick “You’re a whore” Another two kicks, and he didn’t care where they landed “Get out of my house.” He kicked Julian again before turning away. “And don’t come back.”

Dylan was practically shaking with anger now. Of course Julian could slip in a fuck in ten minutes. What kind of man couldn’t come in ten minutes? And people had things called cars. He could have gotten his new fuck buddy to drive him to Dylan’s apartment. If he wasn’t cheating, he would have come up with a better answer.
 
Julian had endured a beating by Dylan before, but never with kicks like this. It was always shoves or smacks, fists even. His boyfriend must have been really angry. The boy had curled up on the floor, in an attempt to keep the damage as little as possible. He swallowed and finally pulled himself into a sitting position slowly. It took a second for him to suck the blood from his lip. He'd hit it on the ground when he'd been shoved down.

Those green eyes had tears in them now. Tears of pain, and probably anger. "Dylan..." He straightened himself as best he could, those wide emerald pools looking up to Dylan hopefully. "I'm sorry... Please baby." The apologies were not even thought of anymore. They sliped from his lips without him figurng out if what they were speaking ofwas his fault.

"Don't make me leave..." Another attempt at trying to get up failed.
 
Dylan refused to turn around. He did however, straighten and cross his arms tightly enough that it must have looked as if he were trying to physically hold himself together. By this point, he had convinced himself that there was another man. He didn’t just suspect it. He was one hundred percent sure of it.

“Why don’t you go run home to your mommy and daddy?” He taunted walking towards the small kitchen. When they had first started dating, he remembered how Julian would speak of his mother and father. They obviously disapproved of their son. It was one of the reasons that Dylan had stayed. He didn’t pity his boyfriend; who wanted pity? But he had felt some sort of kinship with him. They were both given pretty crappy adults to take care of them. They both had no one else to turn to when the world turned into hell. He pulled an oh so familiar bottle out from the bottom drawer.

“I’m sure that they would love to hear how you spent your afternoon; finding someone to replace your terrible boyfriend because he wasn’t good enough for you.” He said the last five words with a mixture of venom and complete devastation and his almost black eyes held a look that couldn't quite be described as anger. He opened the bottle and let the amber liquid burn his throat.
 
Julian had to clench his bottom lip between his teeth at Dylan's words. He'd gotten it to stop bleeding, but worrying it between his teeth like that had only made it bleed again. The boy brushed some auburn hair out of his eyes, looking over to his boyfriend. How like him, drowning his sorrows like that. Avoiding the issues he had with their relationship and himself.

Julian was just as bad, throwing himself into becoming obsessed with his weight. He could forget pain like that. "Dylan, it's not that way." He managed to stand up shakily. There was at least one bruised rib. "I don't have anyone else. I only want you. You know that." He stood at the edge of the kitchen. He really didn't want to get too close. The comments about his parents were almost unbearable though, and he looked to the ground with a little shame.
 
After he had taken a few, rather generous sips, Dylan screwed back on the lid and pushed the alcohol away. He wasn’t aiming to get completely wasted, and this was his best whiskey. There was no need wasting it. He looked up at Julian, despite his resolve not to. Something about the other boy’s appearance just made his blood boil more and he stood up without thinking.

“Right.” He wasn’t shaking with rage as he had been before, but now he was terribly rigid as he slowly walked towards Julian and stood before him, at least a few inches taller. “You spend all of your time at that school and then you’re an hour late… so that you can take a nap?” He took a breath and stilled himself as a slight wave of dizziness lapped over him. There was no way that the alcohol just now could have affected him so quickly and he remembered the drinks he had taken prior to the past hour. “Why don’t you tell me the damn truth?” Without knowing why, Dylan reached out and slapped Julian… hard. The sharp sound resounded in his ears and he made his way to the couch, burying his face in his hands.
 
Julian watched as his boyfriend continued to sip at the bottle. God how he just wanted to tear it away from his hands. Or take a drink of it himself. The boy swallowed and held back a sigh as the other stepped forward, putting the bottle away. The damage was already done, he knew.And there was probably nothing to stop Dylan's anger.

But he couldn't admit to something he didn't do. He knew that arguing it wouldnt work either. So he decided to do neither. And then he was smacked. It was a loud resounding sound, one that stuck with him moments after. It didn't even hurt phyically. More mentally than anything.

"Dylan." The boy stepped over shyly, standing by the edge o the couch. "I'm sorry..." He murmured, letting himself slide onto his knees in front of Dylan. This was grovelling. This was hm begging for forgiveness. "Please. I only want to be your." He murmured, finally managing to look up at the older. "I promise. From here on. Only yours..." The boy shifted. He felt uncomfortable admitting something he hadn't done.
 
Now that Julian wasn’t denying what he had done wrong, Dylan should have been angry. At least he should have been if he was going by his own logic. But the quasi-confession visibly calmed him. His shoulder lost tension and he brought his hands away from his face. The only thing he could do was make sure that Julian wouldn’t cheat again. And even through his whiskey-induced haze, he knew that they were past physical violence now.

His eyes softened and a concerned frown found its way to his mouth. The words ‘I’m sorry stuck in the back of his throat, nearly choking him. It wasn’t his fault. If the truth had been told in the first place, he wouldn’t have lost his temper… at least that’s what he told himself.

Julian looked so much more vulnerable than he had been moments ago and Dylan wasn’t sure how it had happened so quickly. He gazed down at his boyfriend, shame welling up inside of him. He was just like his father. He looked away, suddenly sick to his stomach. “Why did you make me hurt you,” he asked, his voice choked and rough. “You know that I don’t like to hit you, but you always make me do it.” He wasn’t angry at Julian anymore, but at himself instead, something that happened all too often when he drank.
 
Before Dylan even spoke, Julian knew what he was going to say. This was a dialogue they played to all too often. The boy moved his hand out when he was sure that Dylan was no longer angry to the point that he would hit him. The hand fell n Dylan's own. "I.. It was my fault." He answered shakily, then with more resolution. "I shouldn't have talked back to you."

Julian literally hated that. He couldn't stand to see Dylan upset with himself. He'd rather Dylan be angry wiith him than fight himself like that. "I'm sorry.. Dylan. It's my fault..." He pulled the other's hand to hips lips and kissed it. It was an apologetic motion. He then leaned in and attempted a sweet chaste kiss on Dylan's chheek.

Julian looked a little beat up now, his sweatshirt had been lost completely and only his tight shirt was on now. His pants were shuffled about from the kicking, and he really should have pulled them up because they were dangerously low on his hips.
 
Dylan wished more than anything that he could correct Julian; say that it wasn’t his fault. Because deep down, somewhere past the anger and hurt, he knew that it wasn’t. But that was one of Dylan’s primary faults. He couldn’t look past his own problems long enough to care for those that he loved. Luckily for the other boy, drugs and alcohol let him stay calm long enough to at least fake normality.

At the sight of Julian’s disheveled state, Dylan found his eyes wandering. Something about the way that his boyfriend looked turned him on immensely. And he definitely wasn’t drunk enough to handle that yet. Finding another guy hot; that was something he could handle with only a few drinks. But finding his boyfriend, who he had just completely beaten up hot… that was beyond fucked up.

He took Julian’s hand, running his fingers along the all too prominant bones underneath his knuckles. “I love you, okay?” He said quietly, uncomfortably, his unoccupied hand finding the other’s chin and tilting it slightly up towards his face. “And I promise I won’t hurt you again.” Without giving him a chance to answer, Dylan brought his lips to Julian’s, the kiss as feeble as the promise. “Wanna come to my room with me? I just bought some grass a few days ago.” Normally he would have never offered his drugs to someone as clean as Julian, but this was make-up sharing. And he was beginning to really feel the effects of the whiskey.
 
Julian pressed back softly into the kiss. He let out a soft acknowledging sound, closing his eyes for the moment. If he could do that he could forget this for the moment. Forget that Dylan was upset and that it hurt when he was just shifting there. "I'm sorry..." He murmured again, opening his bright green eyes to look into Dylan's.

Part of him thought this was a test. Did Dylar relly want him to smoke, or was he testing him? "Okay..." He stood up with a wince, not letting go of Dylan's hand. "Let's go." He gave Dylan a smile and leaned in closer to him as they walked towards his room.
 
StarlitDreams said:
Dylan wished more than anything that he could correct Julian; say that it wasn’t his fault. Because deep down, somewhere past the anger and hurt, he knew that it wasn’t. But that was one of Dylan’s primary faults. He couldn’t look past his own problems long enough to care for those that he loved. Luckily for the other boy, drugs and alcohol let him stay calm long enough to at least fake normality.

At the sight of Julian’s disheveled state, Dylan found his eyes wandering. Something about the way that his boyfriend looked turned him on immensely. And he definitely wasn’t drunk enough to handle that yet. Finding another guy hot; that was something he could handle with only a few drinks. But finding his boyfriend, who he had just completely beaten up hot… that was beyond fucked up.

He took Julian’s hand, running his fingers along the all too prominant bones underneath his knuckles. “I love you, okay?” He said quietly, uncomfortably, his unoccupied hand finding the other’s chin and tilting it slightly up towards his face. “And I promise I won’t hurt you again.” Without giving him a chance to answer, Dylan brought his lips to Julian’s, the kiss as feeble as the promise. “Wanna come to my room with me? I just bought some grass a few days ago.” Normally he would have never offered his drugs to someone as clean as Julian, but this was make-up sharing. And he was beginning to really feel the effects of the whiskey.
 
Down the short, almost nonexistent hallway and into Dylan’s rather substandard room the couple went. Sometimes, it was embarrassing to let anyone look into his apartment. It was painfully small and usually not too neat. Just because he went to Duke didn’t mean he was rich, but with enough loans to cause a suffocating debt, he was able to attend.

Soon after he entered the room, Dylan opened a small drawer by his bedside. Inside was a variety of unknown substances. He mainly smoked and drank, but occasionally, when his ‘friends’ were over, he would try something of the harder variety. Rolling one makeshift blunt, he took out his lighter and looked over towards Julian.

“I assume you’ve never smoked before?” He asked, his voice laced with a sweetness that hadn’t been there in quite a while. “Just stay calm and follow my lead. Remember, you’re completely safe. No cops live around here, and most people in this apartment are complete pot-heads. They wouldn’t care or call anyone.” He was sure to cover the bases that a lot of first time users were concerned about. This was… enhanced with something a bit stronger than weed and Dylan was fairly sure that the Angel Dust would keep Julian calm. But he wasn’t going to take any chances.

(I think that maybe PMs arent working for you. Or I'm being ignored. But I don't think you would do that... right? PS: If you don't know what the hell Dylan is smoking and the effects (I have no idea how drug savy you are XD) a link follows:http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/pcp/pcp_effects.shtml Also, what's with the post above?)
 
(I'm not ignoring you! D: I think my phone is freaking out. ;3; Ohhh~. Angel Dust. ;D)

Julian followed Dylan and when they finally arrived sat down on the bed. He was glad for the cushion that it was, having been knocked onto that floor. "Mn, never before." He replied, trying to be just as sweet and unknowing. Which really he was. Sometimes he would drink with Dylan, but even that was few and far between.

The boy sat forward on the bed, but triedto stay as close to Dylan as possible. "You're taking my smoking virginity then~?" He laughed softly, but could not hide the pain in his ribs. At least he could distract them with that. Funny that he could still look seductive sucking on that bruised lip.

When Dylan took the first puff he leaned forward and copied the other. Inhaling, then holding and slowly exhaling. A few coughs left him when he was finished, but the boy was already starting to feel relaxed. "That's... Different." He let out a little giggle.
 
Seeing Julian look so relaxed made Dylan happier than any drug could. He took the first puff and exhaled slowly, showing off a bit and blowing a smoke ring. “I guess you could put it that way,” he said with a grin, his eyes practically sparkling with excitement and anticipation. He wasn’t a light weight, but this was absolutely amazing. The tension from the day simply melted away. He knew perfectly well that his happiness was purely psychosomatic and the drug wouldn’t actually take effect on him for a few minutes, but it was still exiting.

As he passed the blunt to Julian, he was proud to see that his boyfriend could be this skilled his first time. He thought with just a bit of joy that perhaps he would be equally as good at blowing Dylan. As they had never had sex high before. Only drunk; and that wasn’t really as pleasant as it could be.

“Hold still and open your mouth,” Dylan said, taking another two hits. Only this time, he held the last one in his mouth. Leaning over towards Julian, he passed the smoke over through a kiss that was much sweeter then his last. Not pulling away, he reached over and stroked the other boy’s hair, feeling for what felt like the first time, how soft and smooth it really was.
 
Julian smiled as Dylan blew the smoke ring. His boyfriend was so smart and talented. Julian was not great at anything. He had common sense, but he was not smart. Perhaps he made up for that in his kind attitude. Everyone that met him loved him, and maybe that was what made Dylan so deathly jealous.

He laughed a little when he saw how much Dylan could smoke. The boy was already begining to feel lightheaded. "Hey...." He giggled unknowingly and breathed into the kiss, bitig his bottom lip when Dylan pulled away. "Mn..." He purred, his hand moving up to rest on Dylan's chest. "You're good at that..." The boy lickedhis lips when he finally pulled away from he kiss.
 
Dylan laughed, not quite knowing what was so funny. Julian was just adorable. From the way that he moved to the way that he talked. And when he was high, he was twice as adorable. “I love you,” he said, his voice soft and sweet as honey, full of the emotion that he was so intent on expressing, “You’re the most… beautiful person… I’ve ever met.” Each pause was filled with a soft kiss. Maybe this was stronger than he had thought.

Yet, immediately after that thought had crossed his mind, it left and he took another few drags, passing most of the smoke over to Julian through more kisses. It didn’t register that perhaps the small, inexperienced boy couldn’t take this much. His mind spun and his hands somehow found the other boy’s ribcage. His hands explored the prominent structure before travelling down towards his stomach and then his hips. His lips meanwhile travelled from Julian’s lips to his neck, leaving a trail of small love bites. By this point, he had discarded the blunt, having taken in more than even he, a seasoned expert when it came to drugs, could take. “I love you,” he repeated, feeling as if it were the first time he had ever said those words.
 
Julian could hardly handle the weed. And that was why he was laughing and giggling as much as he was. The boy leaned in close to Dylan, pressing eagerly into the little kisses. Julian was feeling more and more affectionate with each breath that Dylan gave him. "Mn..." He let out a little purr, his green eyes locking with his boyfriend's. God, Dylan was hot. Did he know that? Really, his boyfriend was very alpha. He was larger than Julian, aggressive... Everything he could want.

"I love you too..." He murmured, letting out a softsound when he felt those fingers press against his thin ribcage. It was bruising now, from the kicks. "Dylan... You're too sweet..." In only a moment he tilted his head to the side, letting out a pleased mewl. The boy shifted, feeling the hands move down him. Almost instantly Julian's mind went to his weight. Was Dylan okay with him? Or was he too heavy? The boy paused, looking down to Dylan. "Am I.. Am I okay?"
 
Dylan’s hands traveled further down. He loved the smooth feel of Julian’s skin, the almost female way that his hipbones rose and fell, how small his waist was; small enough for Dylan to pull his jeans down without even having to unbutton them. “You’re perfect,” He muttered in response to Julian’s question. He felt as if he were dreaming; the world was going so slowly. Everything was perfect. From the silky sort feeling of his boyfriend’s skin, to how the bed seemed to almost swallow the two. At least… that’s what it felt like. The bed was big and soft and the two boys just sunk into it. Soon, they would be part of the bed. But that would be okay. Dylan laughed at the thought as he began to undress himself and Julian.

“Are you warm enough?” He asked softly, peeling the shirt off of the smaller boy. The bruises forming on Julian’s skin were just beautiful. They were like little splashes of blue paint trailing down his body. Dylan traced them with his fingers, pressing harder than he should have. He tugged off his own boxers, then Julian’s. He was fairly hard already, yet despite that, he focused on the other, tracing small patterns on his thighs.
 
What Julian was feeling was indescribable. Dylan just perfect for Julian. He knew all the things to say, all the things to do. Dylan was perfect in every way and Julian really didn't deserve him. Dylan's only fault was that he didn't knw he was perfect. He thought he was flawed. Julian was overanalyzing this far too much. The boy swallowed and licked Dylan's bottom lip. "I love you... " It was obvious that he didn't completely believe Dylan, and that he was a little caught up in all of these actions.

Julian arched his back, pressing those prominent hipbones back into Dylan's hand. God. It felt so nice to be touched likethat. Even when Dylan pressed down a ittle too hard on the bruises, Julian felt turned on. Damn. The pain and pleasure, everything, all of it were blurring together so greatly. "I'm warm... Just stay close to me." And it was obvious he was already hard, especially with Dylan's hands dancing so dangerously close.
 
Dylan’s breathe came in short puffs and his heartbeat felt… odd. It was fast and slow and felt like a bunny, hopping around his chest. For a moment, a streak of pure terror shot through him. But it wasn’t completely negative… the terror was exhilarating. It was hot and pure and made things go in real time. Maybe terror was really good for you. After all adrenaline was supposed to make you feel good, so terror was the same thing, right? It was awful at first, but when it dulled down, it left you with a killer buzz. The thought resounded in Dylan’s mind, echoing back and forth. “I love you too,” he held Julian closer, his body feeling abnormally cold to the older boy.

“Are you sure you feel warm…?” He asked. Well, he thought he asked, but the words didn’t actually leave his mouth. Julian’s hardness was incredibly hot, his small body was hot, his bones were hot, his hair was hot, and everything was turning him on even more. He groaned and pressed himself against Julian’s backside and began stroking him absent mindedly. “I can make you feel warmer,” he whispered, wanting more than anything to be inside of his boyfriend. At this point, he was almost in pain, but it was an amazing kind of pain.
 
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