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Moon
- Joined
- May 1, 2012
- Location
- somewhere sunny
Hanul was already drunk. He didn't have much experience with the inebriated state, but judging by the way most everything was hilarious (even Jonghyun's impression of a penguin dance), and the way he just couldn't stop smiling, Hanul was pretty sure he was feeling the alcohol's affects.
They'd gone to Chanhee's house to "pregame" as Niel called it. Hanul was pretty sure that Niel was just making that name up, because seriously, who would call drinking before a party "pregaming"? He knew people already thought his friends were a bunch of immature assholes, he didn't need it becoming a fact. In his current very probably drunken state, Hanul was certain that allowing any of them to go around saying they were "pregaming" was going to make the before statement true.
He didn't really see the point of this either, getting tipsy before the party. Why drink if you're just going to drink more once you get there? Of course, it all became clear once they actually got to Changhyun's house, why it was so important to stroll in tipsy. Walking into that place sober would have been a bit more difficult than it currently was, because tipsy Hanul wasn't the slightest bit intimidated by his first big house party.
Apparently, Chanhee and Byunghun did this sort of thing all the time, or so they claimed. Hanul would have called them out for bullshit if he hadn't been so busy taking everything in. Under the blacklight his eyes didn't know what to focus on, and instead of making it easy for him they just jumped around from body to body, face to face. If he hadn't ingested any alcohol he probably would have been dizzy by now, with people pushing up against him, but Hanul felt oddly calm in the face of this new venue.
At first he pretty much stuck to Niel, with the other three disappearing, while he and his cousin headed down to the basement. The upstairs had been completely different, like the house parties that you see on TV more, with people just drinking and talking and standing around. In the den though, it was like Hanul had stepped into a club. He wasn't quite sure what to do with himself, but he just enjoyed being there all the same.
It must have been the lighting, the way everyone's teeth glowed out from their lips. It made everyone look so fucking sexy, to the point where he felt the urge to just start touching random strangers. Not that they were behaving in very strangerly fashion towards him, as most people seemed to have nothing but returning smiles for the one that was probably plastered on his face. It had to have been those attractive alienish smiles that goaded him into dancing, because the next thing Hanul knew his drink was being plucked from his hands and he was pushed into the middle of a circle of bodies.
Hanul didn't really think after that, he just did. And it felt amazing. The alcohol let the music run slick smooth through his muscles. He didn't know if he was hitting everything right, he wasn't even sure if what he was doing could be called breaking, but he didn't care. Neither did the people around him seem to mind, because when he actually stopped to better catch his breath, bodies seemed to press right into him. They were warm and soft and moved however he wanted them to, his hands easily directing the girls' bodies as he danced with them.
He wasn't exactly ready though for the way one girl pushed into him, pressing herself so close he could feel all the lines and curves of her body lining up in all the right places against his own frame. It wasn't that he disliked it, it was just that he'd never had someone laid against him so intimately, and it made his liquor coated brain freeze for a moment.
After that it was hard for Hanul to get himself back into the groove, and if he'd known better he would have noticed he was sobering up a bit. As it was though, all he knew was that the girl leaning into him was hardly standing on her own feet, and he realized how unfocused her eyes were, even with a lack of any decent lighting. He suddenly didn't know what to do, and just stood there with this girl rubbing herself into him, which was all kinds of mixed up pleasantly awkward like he'd never thought could be possible.
It started to get a little more awkward than pleasant eventually, but Hanul was luckily saved from more awkwardness of handling a drunk stranger when a small group of girls came and claimed her as their friend. The girl was pealed off of him, not without plenty of uncoordinated resistance from said girl, leaving Hanul just standing there in the basement turned club. He looked around for any sign of Niel, but it was next to impossible to pick out anyone he knew down there.
He thought he saw Jonghyun at one point, but Hanul didn't think it was him because it looked too much like Jonghyun's look-alike was pushed up against the wall, making out with the house's owner and hopeful new member of their little skater group, Changhyun.
Not able to find a familiar face, Hanul traced his steps back upstairs. The cooler air hit him as he left the ear pounding base in favor of making it dull background noise. He realized only then how much he had been sweating downstairs, his shirt was sticking to his back, and he could feel wet beads slipping down his neck. Hanul was used to this kind of thing, but not when he was at some house party. It felt a little gross, like he wanted to change, and really, like he wanted to shower.
He started searching the house for a bathroom, to at least wipe off with a towel, which only them made him realize that he had to take a piss. Badly. He only had to ask one person to point him in the right direction, and upon finding the door Hanul didn't give a single thought as he pushed it open. He froze in his place.
The bathroom was huge, probably easily three times the size of the one he shared with Niel at his uncle's house. Hanul probably would have used it to estimate the relative size of this house, guess it was probably the biggest fucking house he'd ever set foot in, if not for one detail. Someone was already in there. An extremely attractive blonde someone, who was standing in front of the sink, staring at him in surprise.
Maybe it was the fact that the bathroom lighting was normal, like the sudden switch from dark blacklight to regular white light broke his brain or something, but Hanul just kept staring.
"Impatient much?"
Hanul blinked. The girl had said something, something he hadn't caught at all, only the slightly annoyed tone in her voice.
"What?"
"Bathroom. Occupied. You. Just standing there."
Hanul blinked again. The slower speech, like she was talking to some incomprehensible idiot might have been degrading, if it hadn't been what he'd needed to understand her. His hand clenched the doorknob anxiously.
"Right. Um, sorry."
He started to close the door.
"Wait."
He stopped. He waited.
"I'm done." She picked up something off the counter before walking towards the doorway with a smile. A smile that made Hanul's knees feel like they were made of pudding. She patted a hand on his stomach as she passed by. "Its all yours."
Turning his head, he watched as she started to walk off. Hanul suddenly forget why he had come to the bathroom in the first place. His feet moved after her without his brain telling them to. His mouth moved without thought.
"Wait."
A sock. Just one sock.
Hanul flopped back onto the empty bed, unable to stop the way his eyelids slid shut from the weight that his hangover added to them. He was able to work up enough strength in the tired muscles to open his eyes to look over the article of clothing in his hand. He held the thigh high out at arm’s length, the fabric dangling above him. Flashes of images skittered around behind his vision, of thin legs wrapped in dark fabric, eyelashes that glowed under the blacklight, a wide, playful smile. Hanul closed his eyes, trying to hold onto that smile, trying to put the rest of the features with it, to recall a face.
His head started thrumming more painfully with every second he attempted to remember more than just a flicker of a memory from last night. It was like everything was just coming to him in stills, out of sequence, and blurry at best. He gave up when the unpleasant pressure in his head turned into full on throbs. He wouldn’t try drinking alcohol again any time soon.
He opened his eyes again, once more staring at the sock, the throbbing in his skull turning down to a dull ache. He ran his thumb over the white stripe at the top of the sock, where it had hugged her thigh, just above the knee. To think that this was all he would find from last night. Possibly the best night of his life, and he can’t remember one useful thing, no phone number, not even a name. He wakes up alone, only to find one single sock. Hanul lets his arm fall slack onto the bed, the bed that's not his, shutting his eyes again. He lets out a tired sigh, though not without a smile.
“What is this, fucking Cinderella?”
---------
It would be just like Cinderella, if Hanul was a prince who lived in a castle, but, thing is, Hanul is no prince, and he definitely doesn’t live in any castle. Unless garages are being considered today’s trend for the new chateau.
Hanul lives in his uncle’s personal garage, or the loft-storage-space-turned-makeshift-bedroom above it, and has been living there for the past eleven months. Its a surprisingly nice setup. He doesn’t feel like he’s intruding on his uncle too much, he doesn’t have to share a room with his cousin Neil anymore (one too many piles of dirty clothes smelling of molded sweat for even Hanul to handle there), and he gets to wake up every morning to the smell of oil, dust, and lingering exhaust. There’s also the comfort of sleeping near the machines he’s worked on, because Hanul doesn’t see the point of a cuddly teddy bear when you can have a motorcycle instead.
There is one minor problem though: there aren’t any walls or doors to his loft, and he can’t seem to quite get over the wariness he feels about jerking off in the open. Kind of like he wants to right now.
Its the third time in a week that he’s woken up with a boner from dreaming about that girl, the would be Cinderella (its kinda started to stick as a name since Hanul can’t remember one). Its probably because he lost his virginity that night that the dreams are so much more intense than usual. Though, it might have also have to do with the fact that he kept that sock he found, keeps it under his pillow. For safekeeping of course, just so he can properly return it to her when he sees her. If he sees her. She probably misses it a bit.
Hanul doesn’t really think about the way he tries to drag out these particular wanking sessions, the ones brought about via mystery girl. He doesn’t just beat it out, get it over and done with. Instead he lets his mind wander, lets what little memory he has of that night come back to him. A feeling of oddly tingly happiness floods him whenever he thinks about that party. He knows he had a great time, he knows that he flirted with her, laughed with her, made her smile, like it was the best human connection he ever had.
When he wakes up from the dreams about her he knows that everything was there, clear as if it were happening all over again, but as soon as his mind bleeds into consciousness the memories stealthily retreat to the back of his mind once again. Its like they don't want to be found, which is honestly rather irritating for Hanul because he'd really like to remember something to find that girl.
To the return the sock. Obviously. Its not like he thinks of her as his modern day Cinderella or anything.
This particular morning though Hanul doesn't have the time to spare for dirty thoughts about mystery girl like he wants. Its the first day of school of his senior year. His final year of high school, which he probably shouldn't be late for. Its not that he really minds so much about being late or not, but it is his last first day, so even if he's been labeled a slacker he still feels a little bit of sentimentality about it.
Once he's carried out his private routine, Hanul gets out of bed. He throws on a pair of sweats before making his way down the loft and through the garage to the house to wake up Niel. Even if he's feeling a little sentiment for today, he doubts that his cousin cares or even remembers they have school this morning.
---------
He ends up being ten minutes late. As it turned out, Niel didn't remember they had school, though when Hanul reminded him so early in the morning he wasn't particularly thankful, and showed how much he cared by throwing a pillow in Hanul's face. It took the homemade breakfast of Hanul's aunt to get his cousin out of bed, and even then he feel asleep at the table. Hanul had nothing against leaving Niel drooling next to his plate while he went ahead to school, but his aunt had asked him to help keep their son a little studious when he'd moved in with them. It was a bit strange asking someone like Hanul, who really didn't much bother with school work, to do such a thing, but he wasn't going to deny the small request when he really had no way of repaying the fact that they'd taken him in so welcomingly.
Hanul's mom, his uncle's sister, was never exactly the maternal type. She wasn't a bad person or anything, and Hanul really does love his mom, she just wasn't the best parent. Some people probably aren't meant to raise a kid, and no one's really meant to raise one all on their own. Hanul doesn't resent her for being less attentive towards him than she should have been, he can't possibly when he thinks about how terrible of a dad he'd probably make if he had a kid right now.
She was seventeen when he was born, the whole parent's-worst-nightmare-high-school-boyfriend deal. Having a kid when you're still a kid has to have an impact on the way his mom can't seem to ever grow up, the way she still likes to act like she's a teenager. Hanul doesn't hate her for it, but the constant moving around was starting to wear on him, especially when he started high school. He was lucky to have an aunt and uncle who owned a home near his school, just when his mom was starting to play with the idea of moving to Japan.
It worked out well that he could stay with them, to finish out high school with his friends, and work in his uncle's auto shop while his mom left the country. He misses her, but he doesn't try to make her stay in Korea when she comes back for holidays to visit him, because she seems so happy whenever they meet. Her job working for a Japanese designer is turning out better than she'd imagined, with real prospects for the future. Sometimes she even sends him fancy designer and brand name clothes, after the models have used them. Though, they all pretty much eventually end up in Niel's closet unless they're hats.
On the way to school Hanul and Niel met up with Chanhee and Byunghun, which is the real cause for their tardiness. Unlike Niel, Byunghun was excited for their first day of school, though instead of helping to spur him into punctuality, his excitement culminated in a public display on the bus. Unfortunately, the rest of the passengers weren't sharing in his enthusiasm on a Monday morning, and so his lap dancing skills didn't receive the praise he thought they deserved. Instead, the four of them got kicked off the bus, and had to wait for the next one to come along. Hanul was pretty sure that the next bus driver had heard full details about the stupid teenager from some kind of extensive bus radio gossip line, because the gray haired man wouldn't stop glaring at them from his mirror.
The four weren't able to explain away their reason for being late, and Hanul considered hugging the woman in the attendance office for her kindness, because Chanhee's attempt at flirtatious behavior to get them out of detention was more insulting than flattering. She was probably just too used to their idiocy by now, judging by the muttered "just one more year" Hanul heard as they walked away with their class schedules.
The four split up into pairs, Niel with Chanhee for PE, and Hanul with Byunghun for Chemistry. Perfect. Chemistry first thing in the morning. Well, so much for attempting to care about his senior year.
---------
Chemistry first thing in the morning turned out to be worse than Hanul thought it would be, because it wasn't just a tired old man droning away about some infintisemally tiny obscure particle things to a bunch of tired students. Well, it was that, but it was also the head of blond hair sitting directly in front of him.
When Hanul had walked into class he hadn't noticed much of anything, except that he and Byunhun were put on opposite ends of the classroom (their reputation proceeded them after two years in this school). When the teacher had stopped his lecture on class procedure to point out their seats, the blonde girl in the desk before his smiled widely at him. Hanul didn't know her, but he wasn't all that unused to getting strange expressions from people.
Guys tended to either pretended not to see him while discreetly looking him over like he was competition, or simply glared at him. Girls either shied away completely or were openly flirtatious with him. He supposed this one fit into the second category.
It didn't really matter either way with Hanul, until he sat down and started to space out as the teacher went back to boring them all back to sleep. At first he just stared absentmindedly with half lidded eyes at the dyed blonde hair, but after a minute something clicked in his brain.
Blonde. Socks. Party. Cinderella girl.
Hanul closed his eyes and let his head fall into his hands as he felt the beginnings of some kind of memory trying to break free of its hiding place. It was just starting to come to him, just barely surfacing from all that useless muck in his brain, when a wadded piece of paper hit him squarely in the head.
Growling under his breath, Hanul looked up, across the room was Byunghun doing a very poor job of looking innocent. He sent a well deserved glare towards his friend before bending over his desk to pick up the balled up paper, unfolding it on his desk. He stared at what was written.
Lucky bastard. Why do the foreign chicks always like you? I wanna switch seats.
There was a little pouty face drawn below the chicken scratch. Hanul rolled his eyes and crumpled the paper back up in his fist, his other hand reaching into his jacket pocket for his cell phone. He looked up to the front of the room, where their teacher had his back turned to them, then pulled his phone out underneath the desk. He started to punch away a text.
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
srsly? a paper note? r u 5?
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
yes ;D
so, is that her?
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
who?
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
blonde babe from the party man
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
hell no
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
is someone on their period?
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
its not her
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
well, then I call dibs
Hanul can't resist the scoff that comes out of his throat. Really, sometimes, he wonders why he's friends with this guy. Dibs? As if he could actually back that up.
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
yea, sure
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
aw, dont feel bad, well help u find her
Hanul pockets his phone then, shaking his head. He ignores the look he knows his friend is throwing him right now, as well as the buzzing phone in his pocket that signals another text.
Hanul sort of wishes he hadn't told anyone about her now, though, he hadn't even tried to lie about why he was lying naked in a bed in Changhyun's house the morning after when the guys had found him. Its not like he expects to ever see her again. But, just in case the impossible does happen, the last thing he wants is any of his friends getting involved.
He looks back to the head of gold locks in front of him. Hanul wonders if he'd ever be able to pick her out, if he'd even recognize her. He's not stupidly optimistic enough to tell himself yes.
---------
Half the day goes by without event. Hanul enjoys the feel of being back at school, not because he has a hankering for art history, or missed language class, he just likes the nostalgic feel of it all. School is familiar, relaxing in a normalcy kind of way, plus he has his friends here. Even if they skip a lot, this was the place the five of them met and got to know each other first.
He lets his mind cruise on auto pilot during lunch, while the guys keep up a conversation.
"So," Niel starts off, holding his chopsticks out in order to catch everyone's attention. "This Changhyun guy. I approve. That party was wicked awesome."
Hanul nods in agreement with his cousin's words, ignoring the fact that he just used the word 'wicked'. The party was essentially Niel's idea, one he "helpfully hinted" to Changhyun, who's been trying to lobby them into letting him join their group. Its not like they hold some kind of VIP status at their school or something, in actuality, they're like the opposite of VIP, but they do have standards. Everyone knows who the five of them are (even if its for rather unapproved behaviors), so any additions that might change their dynamic, mess up their image of badassery, such things have to be carefully handled.
As their unspoken leader of sorts, Niel has essentially taken it upon himself to determine wether or not Changhyun would mesh with them. Hanul's sure that the house party was probably a test of sorts.
"Yeah. For being a rich fucker he definitely knows how to ditch the class," Chanhee adds with a grin. "I could hang out with him anytime."
"Besides" Byunghun chimes in. "The guy's got connections with that girl's school. Those girls are so deprived that they'll do a lot for some cock."
Chanhee and Byunghun share a high five, Hanul doesn't need to know about their party ventures to be sure that they aren't all talk.
Niel ignores their little bromantic display, and looks to Hanul with a raised brow. Hanul just shrugs.
"He seems alright to me. I've got no problem with it."
Niel raises a hand to his chin, and gives a nod as though he's deeply contemplating this. He looks to the only one of them that's been quiet this whole time. Three pairs of eyes follow Niel's gaze, until the four of them are staring at Jonghyun, waiting of an answer. He doesn't even look up from his food, just leaves his long neck craned over.
"I don't like him."
Byunghun and Chanhee stop their smiling, Niel leans back, crossing his arms with a frown, and Hanul looks on with furrowed brows. The mumbling isn't necessarily uncharacteristic from Jonghyun, but the dislike of a person is. Generally, the second year tends to be the most accepting of them all. It takes another thirty second of their combined staring for Jonghyun to speak again.
"I don't want him hanging out with us."
"Why not?"
Niel raises a finger to his lips as he waits for the answer. Jonghyun just pokes at his food with a moody expression.
"I saw him kissing a guy at the party."
The four of them are speechless for a moment. Surprisingly, Hanul is the first one to speak.
"So?"
Jonghyun huffs out an irritated breath, and puts his food down heavily. "So, he's gay. You want a fag hanging around us?"
He looks up at Hanul with something harsh in his eyes, but when Hanul doesn't answer or look away out of sheer surprise from the animosity in Jonghyun's voice, the younger teen's eyes waver before he looks back down to his food.
"It would just be weird," he's back to mumbling again.
No one says anything, but Hanul doesn't quite miss the way Jonghyun's not able to look him in the eye again. Jonghyun bites on his chopsticks nervously, lips folding around them, and a memory from the party hits Hanul like he's just been slapped in the back of the head.
In the club, or den, or whatever. He remembers. Jonghyun's look-alike making out with Changhyun. Or wait. Not look-alike. It was actually Jonghyun?
Hanul doesn't even hear the rest of the conversation that's started up again amongst the other four. All he can do is stare at his friend, wondering just what all happened at that party.
----------
During his fifth period class Hanul is still thinking about the conversation at lunch. He sort of tried to get Jonghyun alone, to talk to him, but there really wasn't any discreet way to tell Chanhee not to walk with them on their way to class. It was probably just Hanul, but he felt there was a bit of tangible awkwardness in the air between them. Chanhee didn't seem to notice though, as he talked enough by himself for the three of them.
Hanul was still mulling over the possible situation at hand when he sat down in his next class. His feet worked for him, taking him to his desk, while his mind remained in thought. It wasn't until he was called upon did he realize the class was doing self introductions, and even then the teacher had to call his name twice.
Hanul stood up a little abruptly, caught with his brain somewhere else. He gave his name and made to sit down again, though his teacher stopped him by pressing for more. "Any hobbies?"
"Hobbies?" Hanul repeated, like he didn't understand the word.
"Yes. What do you do for fun outside of school?" he answered like he thought Hanul really didn't understand the definition of the word 'hobby'. Not really all that far fetched considering his grade in literature last year.
Hanul made a questioning face to the man, though, for most onlookers, the teacher included, it looked like the troublemaker was scowling at him. The man stayed silent, though he visibly balked.
"Fix stuff. Cars. Bikes. Whatever."
When Hanul didn't offer any more and sat down in his seat again, the teacher took it as his cue to move on to the next student. He wasn't the first teacher that had been intimidated by the tall and rather muscularly matured teen.
"Alright. Um. Do? Kyu Sang?"
Kuyumi.
"Holy shit."
The entire class turned around, all pairs of eyes going straight to Hanul's face. He didn't even notice the stares, because he hadn't yet even noticed that he'd cursed out loud. He was staring at the grains in his desk, not seeing a thing.
"Excuse me?"
Hanul looked up then to find all the students and his teacher looking at him with disbelief. Just wonderful, he must have said that out loud. With everyone staring at him, he couldn't help feeling on the spot, so the explaination he attempted was probably. . . lacking.
"Um, holy shit this class kicks ass?" He didn't even try to sound confident.
Somehow, the diversion worked, mainly due to Hanul's mixed popularity, because about half the class burst into laughter, while the other half either rolled their eyes in acceptance or gave Hanul disapproving looks. He allowed himself a small smirk, though the teacher didn't see what was so funny.
"Lee. Prin-"
"Yeah yeah," he cut the man off with a sigh as he pushed up from his seat. "I'm going."
The fact that he'd just been wrongly accused of making fun of his teacher didn't bother Hanul in the slightest, because he'd just remembered sock girl's name. Nothing could cloud over his mood. And all thanks to the dude sitting next to him. He'd have to thank this Kyu Sang guy for having that name.
They'd gone to Chanhee's house to "pregame" as Niel called it. Hanul was pretty sure that Niel was just making that name up, because seriously, who would call drinking before a party "pregaming"? He knew people already thought his friends were a bunch of immature assholes, he didn't need it becoming a fact. In his current very probably drunken state, Hanul was certain that allowing any of them to go around saying they were "pregaming" was going to make the before statement true.
He didn't really see the point of this either, getting tipsy before the party. Why drink if you're just going to drink more once you get there? Of course, it all became clear once they actually got to Changhyun's house, why it was so important to stroll in tipsy. Walking into that place sober would have been a bit more difficult than it currently was, because tipsy Hanul wasn't the slightest bit intimidated by his first big house party.
Apparently, Chanhee and Byunghun did this sort of thing all the time, or so they claimed. Hanul would have called them out for bullshit if he hadn't been so busy taking everything in. Under the blacklight his eyes didn't know what to focus on, and instead of making it easy for him they just jumped around from body to body, face to face. If he hadn't ingested any alcohol he probably would have been dizzy by now, with people pushing up against him, but Hanul felt oddly calm in the face of this new venue.
At first he pretty much stuck to Niel, with the other three disappearing, while he and his cousin headed down to the basement. The upstairs had been completely different, like the house parties that you see on TV more, with people just drinking and talking and standing around. In the den though, it was like Hanul had stepped into a club. He wasn't quite sure what to do with himself, but he just enjoyed being there all the same.
It must have been the lighting, the way everyone's teeth glowed out from their lips. It made everyone look so fucking sexy, to the point where he felt the urge to just start touching random strangers. Not that they were behaving in very strangerly fashion towards him, as most people seemed to have nothing but returning smiles for the one that was probably plastered on his face. It had to have been those attractive alienish smiles that goaded him into dancing, because the next thing Hanul knew his drink was being plucked from his hands and he was pushed into the middle of a circle of bodies.
Hanul didn't really think after that, he just did. And it felt amazing. The alcohol let the music run slick smooth through his muscles. He didn't know if he was hitting everything right, he wasn't even sure if what he was doing could be called breaking, but he didn't care. Neither did the people around him seem to mind, because when he actually stopped to better catch his breath, bodies seemed to press right into him. They were warm and soft and moved however he wanted them to, his hands easily directing the girls' bodies as he danced with them.
He wasn't exactly ready though for the way one girl pushed into him, pressing herself so close he could feel all the lines and curves of her body lining up in all the right places against his own frame. It wasn't that he disliked it, it was just that he'd never had someone laid against him so intimately, and it made his liquor coated brain freeze for a moment.
After that it was hard for Hanul to get himself back into the groove, and if he'd known better he would have noticed he was sobering up a bit. As it was though, all he knew was that the girl leaning into him was hardly standing on her own feet, and he realized how unfocused her eyes were, even with a lack of any decent lighting. He suddenly didn't know what to do, and just stood there with this girl rubbing herself into him, which was all kinds of mixed up pleasantly awkward like he'd never thought could be possible.
It started to get a little more awkward than pleasant eventually, but Hanul was luckily saved from more awkwardness of handling a drunk stranger when a small group of girls came and claimed her as their friend. The girl was pealed off of him, not without plenty of uncoordinated resistance from said girl, leaving Hanul just standing there in the basement turned club. He looked around for any sign of Niel, but it was next to impossible to pick out anyone he knew down there.
He thought he saw Jonghyun at one point, but Hanul didn't think it was him because it looked too much like Jonghyun's look-alike was pushed up against the wall, making out with the house's owner and hopeful new member of their little skater group, Changhyun.
Not able to find a familiar face, Hanul traced his steps back upstairs. The cooler air hit him as he left the ear pounding base in favor of making it dull background noise. He realized only then how much he had been sweating downstairs, his shirt was sticking to his back, and he could feel wet beads slipping down his neck. Hanul was used to this kind of thing, but not when he was at some house party. It felt a little gross, like he wanted to change, and really, like he wanted to shower.
He started searching the house for a bathroom, to at least wipe off with a towel, which only them made him realize that he had to take a piss. Badly. He only had to ask one person to point him in the right direction, and upon finding the door Hanul didn't give a single thought as he pushed it open. He froze in his place.
The bathroom was huge, probably easily three times the size of the one he shared with Niel at his uncle's house. Hanul probably would have used it to estimate the relative size of this house, guess it was probably the biggest fucking house he'd ever set foot in, if not for one detail. Someone was already in there. An extremely attractive blonde someone, who was standing in front of the sink, staring at him in surprise.
Maybe it was the fact that the bathroom lighting was normal, like the sudden switch from dark blacklight to regular white light broke his brain or something, but Hanul just kept staring.
"Impatient much?"
Hanul blinked. The girl had said something, something he hadn't caught at all, only the slightly annoyed tone in her voice.
"What?"
"Bathroom. Occupied. You. Just standing there."
Hanul blinked again. The slower speech, like she was talking to some incomprehensible idiot might have been degrading, if it hadn't been what he'd needed to understand her. His hand clenched the doorknob anxiously.
"Right. Um, sorry."
He started to close the door.
"Wait."
He stopped. He waited.
"I'm done." She picked up something off the counter before walking towards the doorway with a smile. A smile that made Hanul's knees feel like they were made of pudding. She patted a hand on his stomach as she passed by. "Its all yours."
Turning his head, he watched as she started to walk off. Hanul suddenly forget why he had come to the bathroom in the first place. His feet moved after her without his brain telling them to. His mouth moved without thought.
"Wait."
* * * * *
A sock. Just one sock.
Hanul flopped back onto the empty bed, unable to stop the way his eyelids slid shut from the weight that his hangover added to them. He was able to work up enough strength in the tired muscles to open his eyes to look over the article of clothing in his hand. He held the thigh high out at arm’s length, the fabric dangling above him. Flashes of images skittered around behind his vision, of thin legs wrapped in dark fabric, eyelashes that glowed under the blacklight, a wide, playful smile. Hanul closed his eyes, trying to hold onto that smile, trying to put the rest of the features with it, to recall a face.
His head started thrumming more painfully with every second he attempted to remember more than just a flicker of a memory from last night. It was like everything was just coming to him in stills, out of sequence, and blurry at best. He gave up when the unpleasant pressure in his head turned into full on throbs. He wouldn’t try drinking alcohol again any time soon.
He opened his eyes again, once more staring at the sock, the throbbing in his skull turning down to a dull ache. He ran his thumb over the white stripe at the top of the sock, where it had hugged her thigh, just above the knee. To think that this was all he would find from last night. Possibly the best night of his life, and he can’t remember one useful thing, no phone number, not even a name. He wakes up alone, only to find one single sock. Hanul lets his arm fall slack onto the bed, the bed that's not his, shutting his eyes again. He lets out a tired sigh, though not without a smile.
“What is this, fucking Cinderella?”
---------
It would be just like Cinderella, if Hanul was a prince who lived in a castle, but, thing is, Hanul is no prince, and he definitely doesn’t live in any castle. Unless garages are being considered today’s trend for the new chateau.
Hanul lives in his uncle’s personal garage, or the loft-storage-space-turned-makeshift-bedroom above it, and has been living there for the past eleven months. Its a surprisingly nice setup. He doesn’t feel like he’s intruding on his uncle too much, he doesn’t have to share a room with his cousin Neil anymore (one too many piles of dirty clothes smelling of molded sweat for even Hanul to handle there), and he gets to wake up every morning to the smell of oil, dust, and lingering exhaust. There’s also the comfort of sleeping near the machines he’s worked on, because Hanul doesn’t see the point of a cuddly teddy bear when you can have a motorcycle instead.
There is one minor problem though: there aren’t any walls or doors to his loft, and he can’t seem to quite get over the wariness he feels about jerking off in the open. Kind of like he wants to right now.
Its the third time in a week that he’s woken up with a boner from dreaming about that girl, the would be Cinderella (its kinda started to stick as a name since Hanul can’t remember one). Its probably because he lost his virginity that night that the dreams are so much more intense than usual. Though, it might have also have to do with the fact that he kept that sock he found, keeps it under his pillow. For safekeeping of course, just so he can properly return it to her when he sees her. If he sees her. She probably misses it a bit.
Hanul doesn’t really think about the way he tries to drag out these particular wanking sessions, the ones brought about via mystery girl. He doesn’t just beat it out, get it over and done with. Instead he lets his mind wander, lets what little memory he has of that night come back to him. A feeling of oddly tingly happiness floods him whenever he thinks about that party. He knows he had a great time, he knows that he flirted with her, laughed with her, made her smile, like it was the best human connection he ever had.
When he wakes up from the dreams about her he knows that everything was there, clear as if it were happening all over again, but as soon as his mind bleeds into consciousness the memories stealthily retreat to the back of his mind once again. Its like they don't want to be found, which is honestly rather irritating for Hanul because he'd really like to remember something to find that girl.
To the return the sock. Obviously. Its not like he thinks of her as his modern day Cinderella or anything.
This particular morning though Hanul doesn't have the time to spare for dirty thoughts about mystery girl like he wants. Its the first day of school of his senior year. His final year of high school, which he probably shouldn't be late for. Its not that he really minds so much about being late or not, but it is his last first day, so even if he's been labeled a slacker he still feels a little bit of sentimentality about it.
Once he's carried out his private routine, Hanul gets out of bed. He throws on a pair of sweats before making his way down the loft and through the garage to the house to wake up Niel. Even if he's feeling a little sentiment for today, he doubts that his cousin cares or even remembers they have school this morning.
---------
He ends up being ten minutes late. As it turned out, Niel didn't remember they had school, though when Hanul reminded him so early in the morning he wasn't particularly thankful, and showed how much he cared by throwing a pillow in Hanul's face. It took the homemade breakfast of Hanul's aunt to get his cousin out of bed, and even then he feel asleep at the table. Hanul had nothing against leaving Niel drooling next to his plate while he went ahead to school, but his aunt had asked him to help keep their son a little studious when he'd moved in with them. It was a bit strange asking someone like Hanul, who really didn't much bother with school work, to do such a thing, but he wasn't going to deny the small request when he really had no way of repaying the fact that they'd taken him in so welcomingly.
Hanul's mom, his uncle's sister, was never exactly the maternal type. She wasn't a bad person or anything, and Hanul really does love his mom, she just wasn't the best parent. Some people probably aren't meant to raise a kid, and no one's really meant to raise one all on their own. Hanul doesn't resent her for being less attentive towards him than she should have been, he can't possibly when he thinks about how terrible of a dad he'd probably make if he had a kid right now.
She was seventeen when he was born, the whole parent's-worst-nightmare-high-school-boyfriend deal. Having a kid when you're still a kid has to have an impact on the way his mom can't seem to ever grow up, the way she still likes to act like she's a teenager. Hanul doesn't hate her for it, but the constant moving around was starting to wear on him, especially when he started high school. He was lucky to have an aunt and uncle who owned a home near his school, just when his mom was starting to play with the idea of moving to Japan.
It worked out well that he could stay with them, to finish out high school with his friends, and work in his uncle's auto shop while his mom left the country. He misses her, but he doesn't try to make her stay in Korea when she comes back for holidays to visit him, because she seems so happy whenever they meet. Her job working for a Japanese designer is turning out better than she'd imagined, with real prospects for the future. Sometimes she even sends him fancy designer and brand name clothes, after the models have used them. Though, they all pretty much eventually end up in Niel's closet unless they're hats.
On the way to school Hanul and Niel met up with Chanhee and Byunghun, which is the real cause for their tardiness. Unlike Niel, Byunghun was excited for their first day of school, though instead of helping to spur him into punctuality, his excitement culminated in a public display on the bus. Unfortunately, the rest of the passengers weren't sharing in his enthusiasm on a Monday morning, and so his lap dancing skills didn't receive the praise he thought they deserved. Instead, the four of them got kicked off the bus, and had to wait for the next one to come along. Hanul was pretty sure that the next bus driver had heard full details about the stupid teenager from some kind of extensive bus radio gossip line, because the gray haired man wouldn't stop glaring at them from his mirror.
The four weren't able to explain away their reason for being late, and Hanul considered hugging the woman in the attendance office for her kindness, because Chanhee's attempt at flirtatious behavior to get them out of detention was more insulting than flattering. She was probably just too used to their idiocy by now, judging by the muttered "just one more year" Hanul heard as they walked away with their class schedules.
The four split up into pairs, Niel with Chanhee for PE, and Hanul with Byunghun for Chemistry. Perfect. Chemistry first thing in the morning. Well, so much for attempting to care about his senior year.
---------
Chemistry first thing in the morning turned out to be worse than Hanul thought it would be, because it wasn't just a tired old man droning away about some infintisemally tiny obscure particle things to a bunch of tired students. Well, it was that, but it was also the head of blond hair sitting directly in front of him.
When Hanul had walked into class he hadn't noticed much of anything, except that he and Byunhun were put on opposite ends of the classroom (their reputation proceeded them after two years in this school). When the teacher had stopped his lecture on class procedure to point out their seats, the blonde girl in the desk before his smiled widely at him. Hanul didn't know her, but he wasn't all that unused to getting strange expressions from people.
Guys tended to either pretended not to see him while discreetly looking him over like he was competition, or simply glared at him. Girls either shied away completely or were openly flirtatious with him. He supposed this one fit into the second category.
It didn't really matter either way with Hanul, until he sat down and started to space out as the teacher went back to boring them all back to sleep. At first he just stared absentmindedly with half lidded eyes at the dyed blonde hair, but after a minute something clicked in his brain.
Blonde. Socks. Party. Cinderella girl.
Hanul closed his eyes and let his head fall into his hands as he felt the beginnings of some kind of memory trying to break free of its hiding place. It was just starting to come to him, just barely surfacing from all that useless muck in his brain, when a wadded piece of paper hit him squarely in the head.
Growling under his breath, Hanul looked up, across the room was Byunghun doing a very poor job of looking innocent. He sent a well deserved glare towards his friend before bending over his desk to pick up the balled up paper, unfolding it on his desk. He stared at what was written.
Lucky bastard. Why do the foreign chicks always like you? I wanna switch seats.
There was a little pouty face drawn below the chicken scratch. Hanul rolled his eyes and crumpled the paper back up in his fist, his other hand reaching into his jacket pocket for his cell phone. He looked up to the front of the room, where their teacher had his back turned to them, then pulled his phone out underneath the desk. He started to punch away a text.
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
srsly? a paper note? r u 5?
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
yes ;D
so, is that her?
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
who?
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
blonde babe from the party man
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
hell no
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
is someone on their period?
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
its not her
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
well, then I call dibs
Hanul can't resist the scoff that comes out of his throat. Really, sometimes, he wonders why he's friends with this guy. Dibs? As if he could actually back that up.
To: Byunghun
Fr: Hanul
yea, sure
To: Hanul
Fr: Byunghun
aw, dont feel bad, well help u find her
Hanul pockets his phone then, shaking his head. He ignores the look he knows his friend is throwing him right now, as well as the buzzing phone in his pocket that signals another text.
Hanul sort of wishes he hadn't told anyone about her now, though, he hadn't even tried to lie about why he was lying naked in a bed in Changhyun's house the morning after when the guys had found him. Its not like he expects to ever see her again. But, just in case the impossible does happen, the last thing he wants is any of his friends getting involved.
He looks back to the head of gold locks in front of him. Hanul wonders if he'd ever be able to pick her out, if he'd even recognize her. He's not stupidly optimistic enough to tell himself yes.
---------
Half the day goes by without event. Hanul enjoys the feel of being back at school, not because he has a hankering for art history, or missed language class, he just likes the nostalgic feel of it all. School is familiar, relaxing in a normalcy kind of way, plus he has his friends here. Even if they skip a lot, this was the place the five of them met and got to know each other first.
He lets his mind cruise on auto pilot during lunch, while the guys keep up a conversation.
"So," Niel starts off, holding his chopsticks out in order to catch everyone's attention. "This Changhyun guy. I approve. That party was wicked awesome."
Hanul nods in agreement with his cousin's words, ignoring the fact that he just used the word 'wicked'. The party was essentially Niel's idea, one he "helpfully hinted" to Changhyun, who's been trying to lobby them into letting him join their group. Its not like they hold some kind of VIP status at their school or something, in actuality, they're like the opposite of VIP, but they do have standards. Everyone knows who the five of them are (even if its for rather unapproved behaviors), so any additions that might change their dynamic, mess up their image of badassery, such things have to be carefully handled.
As their unspoken leader of sorts, Niel has essentially taken it upon himself to determine wether or not Changhyun would mesh with them. Hanul's sure that the house party was probably a test of sorts.
"Yeah. For being a rich fucker he definitely knows how to ditch the class," Chanhee adds with a grin. "I could hang out with him anytime."
"Besides" Byunghun chimes in. "The guy's got connections with that girl's school. Those girls are so deprived that they'll do a lot for some cock."
Chanhee and Byunghun share a high five, Hanul doesn't need to know about their party ventures to be sure that they aren't all talk.
Niel ignores their little bromantic display, and looks to Hanul with a raised brow. Hanul just shrugs.
"He seems alright to me. I've got no problem with it."
Niel raises a hand to his chin, and gives a nod as though he's deeply contemplating this. He looks to the only one of them that's been quiet this whole time. Three pairs of eyes follow Niel's gaze, until the four of them are staring at Jonghyun, waiting of an answer. He doesn't even look up from his food, just leaves his long neck craned over.
"I don't like him."
Byunghun and Chanhee stop their smiling, Niel leans back, crossing his arms with a frown, and Hanul looks on with furrowed brows. The mumbling isn't necessarily uncharacteristic from Jonghyun, but the dislike of a person is. Generally, the second year tends to be the most accepting of them all. It takes another thirty second of their combined staring for Jonghyun to speak again.
"I don't want him hanging out with us."
"Why not?"
Niel raises a finger to his lips as he waits for the answer. Jonghyun just pokes at his food with a moody expression.
"I saw him kissing a guy at the party."
The four of them are speechless for a moment. Surprisingly, Hanul is the first one to speak.
"So?"
Jonghyun huffs out an irritated breath, and puts his food down heavily. "So, he's gay. You want a fag hanging around us?"
He looks up at Hanul with something harsh in his eyes, but when Hanul doesn't answer or look away out of sheer surprise from the animosity in Jonghyun's voice, the younger teen's eyes waver before he looks back down to his food.
"It would just be weird," he's back to mumbling again.
No one says anything, but Hanul doesn't quite miss the way Jonghyun's not able to look him in the eye again. Jonghyun bites on his chopsticks nervously, lips folding around them, and a memory from the party hits Hanul like he's just been slapped in the back of the head.
In the club, or den, or whatever. He remembers. Jonghyun's look-alike making out with Changhyun. Or wait. Not look-alike. It was actually Jonghyun?
Hanul doesn't even hear the rest of the conversation that's started up again amongst the other four. All he can do is stare at his friend, wondering just what all happened at that party.
----------
During his fifth period class Hanul is still thinking about the conversation at lunch. He sort of tried to get Jonghyun alone, to talk to him, but there really wasn't any discreet way to tell Chanhee not to walk with them on their way to class. It was probably just Hanul, but he felt there was a bit of tangible awkwardness in the air between them. Chanhee didn't seem to notice though, as he talked enough by himself for the three of them.
Hanul was still mulling over the possible situation at hand when he sat down in his next class. His feet worked for him, taking him to his desk, while his mind remained in thought. It wasn't until he was called upon did he realize the class was doing self introductions, and even then the teacher had to call his name twice.
Hanul stood up a little abruptly, caught with his brain somewhere else. He gave his name and made to sit down again, though his teacher stopped him by pressing for more. "Any hobbies?"
"Hobbies?" Hanul repeated, like he didn't understand the word.
"Yes. What do you do for fun outside of school?" he answered like he thought Hanul really didn't understand the definition of the word 'hobby'. Not really all that far fetched considering his grade in literature last year.
Hanul made a questioning face to the man, though, for most onlookers, the teacher included, it looked like the troublemaker was scowling at him. The man stayed silent, though he visibly balked.
"Fix stuff. Cars. Bikes. Whatever."
When Hanul didn't offer any more and sat down in his seat again, the teacher took it as his cue to move on to the next student. He wasn't the first teacher that had been intimidated by the tall and rather muscularly matured teen.
"Alright. Um. Do? Kyu Sang?"
Kuyumi.
"Holy shit."
The entire class turned around, all pairs of eyes going straight to Hanul's face. He didn't even notice the stares, because he hadn't yet even noticed that he'd cursed out loud. He was staring at the grains in his desk, not seeing a thing.
"Excuse me?"
Hanul looked up then to find all the students and his teacher looking at him with disbelief. Just wonderful, he must have said that out loud. With everyone staring at him, he couldn't help feeling on the spot, so the explaination he attempted was probably. . . lacking.
"Um, holy shit this class kicks ass?" He didn't even try to sound confident.
Somehow, the diversion worked, mainly due to Hanul's mixed popularity, because about half the class burst into laughter, while the other half either rolled their eyes in acceptance or gave Hanul disapproving looks. He allowed himself a small smirk, though the teacher didn't see what was so funny.
"Lee. Prin-"
"Yeah yeah," he cut the man off with a sigh as he pushed up from his seat. "I'm going."
The fact that he'd just been wrongly accused of making fun of his teacher didn't bother Hanul in the slightest, because he'd just remembered sock girl's name. Nothing could cloud over his mood. And all thanks to the dude sitting next to him. He'd have to thank this Kyu Sang guy for having that name.