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- Aug 21, 2010
"Curses!" screamed The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr. "Can't you dimwits shoot a simple space scout from the skies?"
"Well, our Very Expensive and Evil defense system was meant to defend against an armada of ships, not a lone scout ship. That ship is difficult to hit. It has the most sophisticated randomize defensive manuevering algorithm I've ever seen. It's as if... as if..."
"As if what, pea-brain?"
"As if someone was sliding around the cockpit cabin chasing a tin can in an attempt to do anything but steer the spaceship."
"Idiot." The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr smacked the pod creature with her Very Evil Staff of DOOM. "Now call my henchmen!"
"HENCHMEN!!!" the pod creature yelled.
"I could have done that," she yelled, whacking him again.
Only a handful showed up, which actually was quite normal for a series like this for some reason. The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr pointed to one of her Very Evil minions and asked, "Which one are you?"
"T'K'La'T'Hp'Vt'Tr'K, of the Cl'D'F'H'J'K clan of the Race of the L'H'J'Kl'Fr'K", it replied.
"Oh, right. Fred."
"And you?"
"Chuck."
"Got it. Fred, why can't you have a normal name?", she said, smacking Fred on the head with her staff of DOOM. "Go get the Very Evil and Expensive CGI Beast and greet our friends. Nyahaahahaa!"
"Nyahahaahha," chorused her minions.
"Shut up!"
*****
"Nyahahahaha", said The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr. She was watching her Very Evil Henchmen and the Very Evil and Expensive CGI Beast on the monitor overhead. She saw them greet the Magical Space Pirate Ninja Catgirl Ranger Princess Maids. "Hmm. What are they saying? And why the **** can't we get a monitor that *isn't* above our heads?"
"Well, in our language, it's 'Hello, sisters. I mean you no harm. Let us sit down and discuss peacefully the dismal state of women's rights in this quadrant of the galaxy'," replied the pod person.
"Hmm. Do any of them have translating devices?"
"Well, if not, Fred's going to be in a bit of a surprise."
"Why? What did he say in their language?"
"Hmm. Well, I just typed in what Fred said into Google, and it translates, "HEY YOU SKANKY HO BITCHES, WE IS GOING TO RAPE JOO. NOW BEND OVER AND LET US **** YOUR BIG FAT ASSES.'"
The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr paused a bit.
Then she threw her head back. "Nyahaahahaha!"
"Nyahahaahha," chorused her minions.
"Shut up!"
"Well, our Very Expensive and Evil defense system was meant to defend against an armada of ships, not a lone scout ship. That ship is difficult to hit. It has the most sophisticated randomize defensive manuevering algorithm I've ever seen. It's as if... as if..."
"As if what, pea-brain?"
"As if someone was sliding around the cockpit cabin chasing a tin can in an attempt to do anything but steer the spaceship."
"Idiot." The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr smacked the pod creature with her Very Evil Staff of DOOM. "Now call my henchmen!"
"HENCHMEN!!!" the pod creature yelled.
"I could have done that," she yelled, whacking him again.
Only a handful showed up, which actually was quite normal for a series like this for some reason. The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr pointed to one of her Very Evil minions and asked, "Which one are you?"
"T'K'La'T'Hp'Vt'Tr'K, of the Cl'D'F'H'J'K clan of the Race of the L'H'J'Kl'Fr'K", it replied.
"Oh, right. Fred."
"And you?"
"Chuck."
"Got it. Fred, why can't you have a normal name?", she said, smacking Fred on the head with her staff of DOOM. "Go get the Very Evil and Expensive CGI Beast and greet our friends. Nyahaahahaa!"
"Nyahahaahha," chorused her minions.
"Shut up!"
*****
"Nyahahahaha", said The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr. She was watching her Very Evil Henchmen and the Very Evil and Expensive CGI Beast on the monitor overhead. She saw them greet the Magical Space Pirate Ninja Catgirl Ranger Princess Maids. "Hmm. What are they saying? And why the **** can't we get a monitor that *isn't* above our heads?"
"Well, in our language, it's 'Hello, sisters. I mean you no harm. Let us sit down and discuss peacefully the dismal state of women's rights in this quadrant of the galaxy'," replied the pod person.
"Hmm. Do any of them have translating devices?"
"Well, if not, Fred's going to be in a bit of a surprise."
"Why? What did he say in their language?"
"Hmm. Well, I just typed in what Fred said into Google, and it translates, "HEY YOU SKANKY HO BITCHES, WE IS GOING TO RAPE JOO. NOW BEND OVER AND LET US **** YOUR BIG FAT ASSES.'"
The Very Evil Queen MILF S'mthingrthr paused a bit.
Then she threw her head back. "Nyahaahahaha!"
"Nyahahaahha," chorused her minions.
"Shut up!"