And I'm supposed to be an adult?

[Cheshire Pup]

Well I'm 18... Good for me. Now I can be charged as an adult if I ever decide to shoplift again or do something stupid, yeah, lots to celebrate there. The only person I cared about sharing my birthday with left long ago, not that it matters much to him. He wants me to forget about him, to go back to being the way I was before I met him. Sounds sweet right? Not. It's selfish, I like the memories of the time we had even if it hurts to remember thing! Besides, it's not like I could forget him if I would, for a while I tried and that got me no where. Things only got worse when my birthday came and passed.

My family did a little thing, took me to go see The Last Air Bender, I'm a huge Avatar fan. (Yes, I'm an adult and I like cartoons, so sue me.) Watching it all I could do was sit there and watch, naming every episode and explaining the intricacies and the differences to my father. He is a bit slow when it comes to movies and I'm far to fast to be able to enjoy most of them. (Yeah, remember when Fantastic 4 came out ad everyone was all excited? The minute I saw the statue of him in front of his company and saw the metal beneath the flesh I leaned over and whispered to my dad "He's going to become his own statue" and sure enough he did.) After the movie let out my dad took us to sushi. It's my mom's favorite, even if it was my birthday dinner. (I wanted to go somewhere mom wouldn't complain about what she could and couldn't eat on her diet.) During dinner I explained what wasn't shown in the movie and how the ending sucked compared to how the first season ended. My brother doesn't think there will be a sequel.

I'm not sure if I want one, my favorite character doesn't show up until next season so she didn't make it into this movie, I would have liked to see the Kyoshi Warriors in this movie but they didn't make it either. If there is no sequel then at least they can't crew up my favorite character. (Toph.) But none of this really matters, mundane stuff and all. Though I guess that is what journals are unless I have some big huge life changing event. I probably will eventually but right now it' meaningless chatter. I will try and get back into drawing and come onto the scene as an artist. But, about my birthday, my mother ended up throwing a fit about something when we got home. (Surprise, surprise.) So not even one break form the yelling.

Birthday month come and gone and I forgot to throw a party for myself. That sure speaks volumes doesn't it? Turning 18 and not having a party. I hung out with some friends after hanging out with my parents but they were on drugs, they made me a drunk, I sipped some and throw the rest down the drain to convince them I drank it, acting drunk was easy but I'm not a drug user and I don't want to be.... Hell I say that now but I may get into it eventually. Not in the best mood now, sort of rambling.

My eyes hurt from crying over him again, I've really got to stop this, it's pathetic and I know it is but it's a broken heart and I'll be damned if there is a fast way to get over that. Still, I wish it wasn't taking so long, I'm beginning to remember things I thought when he stopped talking to me, that I'll never get over him. I'm thinking now more then I did before that might be true. He knew he was hurting me but he did it anyways, he promised me that time would heal it. I've heard that line before, truth is time doesn't heal thing, it just lets you adjust to the hurt like listening to really loud music: At first it hurts your ears but the more you listen to it the more you get used to it and soon you're deaf and loud music will never bother you again.

Hell I don't know, maybe I just need someone to replace him, he sure found it easy enough to replace me. But then again I wouldn't know because he still won't talk to me. Instead he leaves me drowning in hurt and waiting for time to save me.

Me:"Help! Help me I'm drowning!"
Time:"Oh, me? Naw, to soon, I'll save you in a couple of months, but just sort of."
Me:"Sort of?"
Time:"Oh yeah, I can save you from drowning in misery but only slowly, really slow, first I'll keep your head above the water so you don't drown in it, then when you've been neck deep for a while I'll pull some more of you out, you're fingers will be all prunie but chocolate will make that feel better."
Me:"So when do you pull me all the way out?"
Time:"All the way? Don't be silly! That'd be to easy, first you have to wade through it for a while, waist deep, then slosh through it some more and maybe in a year or two you'll just be splashing in puddles."
Me:"But I'll never be completely out of it?"
Time:"Hey! Hey! Be grateful! I'm Time not magic. You want your instant fix go talk to Pharmacy! Watch out for those side effects, they're a duzzy."
So as you can imagine Time has been really helpful.

Then again I should expect much, it shouldn't bother me if he falls back into the way he was but it does. It really does. I cared about him and he just left you know? Well, whatever, this thread is supposed to be about me not him.

I'm wondering if it is okay to have a party a month late. I don't see why not, well, I don't see why not, yet. My mother will probably bitch about it but there isn't much she doesn't bitch about. Good things about living at home: Free food, free board, free power, water and laundry access. Bad things about living at home: Putting up with my mother. You know the good things should have more weight but then really don't. But what ever, she'll always have something to bitch about.

Tomorrow I get to go to my Aunt's lover's birthday party! :dodgy: yay :dodgy: I get to watch two grown adults get drunker then the people you see at the hospital with alcohol poisoning. Hope we can bring the (cheap) air hockey table we bought. Nothing funner then watching people with delayed reflexes playing air hockey. Trust me. Once my aunt thought my dog was talking to her, they had a long conversation... good thing I leave early!

Off to be a nerd and play some

tomorrow. Tenth level half elf druid for the win! ... Not really, I've been really bad with my class, it's a hard class and I haven't put the effort int it, as it is I forgot to study my spells. A few weeks ago (on a very hormonal time of the month based decision) I decided that I'd put the serious effort into it so they'd stop bitching at me. (Bitching at me seems to be almost a national pass time.) I've been better so they've found other things to bitch about. (I swear they bitch more then I do and I'm the only girl in the group! The only time I can even match their bitching is when I'm PMSing! (Ironically not often...)) Still, I like the game and I like the DM (not that way) so I stick to the campaign and do my best to get better.

I've become damn near nocturnal, waking up passed noon and going to bed after sunrise. I find it relaxing though. They sky turns the mot beautiful shade of blue for only a few minutes. I've childishly come to call it "Magic Blue." I find it calming and enjoy seeing it when I get the chance. So I'll log off now, end the rant for tonight so I can watch the sky for the magic blue I've come to love. And I'm supposed to be an adult.

 

[TakodaVega]

Wait wait wait. You were Underaged before? <_______<

 

[Trygon]

This has happened before. See you in a week, Cheshire.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

It will get better. You are strong and smart, so I am confident of your ability to bounce back. And glad you got to celebrate your birthday.

Sorry I did not get you anything.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Yes, I was, as clearly Seraph also seemed to notice. Clear for the week long ban that was just just lifted. Oddly enough I have to say I'm not mad about it. I mean ,sure, being banned for a week sucked but I have to know its his job to do that and I did break a rule. (Though I find it funny that the reason I was banned for a week was listed as Rule Evasion.) I've been looking through the PvP and I see people banned for a week making a second about just to bitch about it and, having gone through the week ban I think I can say: GROW UP! I mean, its a week! Is there really nothing else in your life to where you can't last a week without this place?

Admittedly I hated, it but then again I wasn't really supposed to enjoy it was I. All in all the week is over, I am back no worse for wear and it's nice to see that not everyone was concerned about the fact that I was previously under aged. I'd be surprised if I was the only one. I used to lurk around here a lot, I actually followed Darker through many sights before it joined then like a lot of other Darker refugees I found this place and made another account here. When I first came here I didn't like it, my favorite partner hadn't found his/her way to the site so I didn't have much to do but it didn't take long to meet new friends, make new partners and such. Unfortunately my friend did eventually find his/her way here and I say unfortunately because when they got here I got really excited for the prospect of restarting (what at that point had been) my favorite role play ever. We tried it, well it didn't work out. In the time that he/she had been away their interests changed and I wasn't unto what they were into now. Huge bummer.

I got over that quickly enough though, Padan, as confident as you are I'll get through this I have to say it isn't easy. The ironic thing, I realized, was that I tried to hard to keep him form falling for me that I hadn't even realized I had fallen for him. Funny how it sneaks up on you like that. Maybe I'm the only one oblivious to things like this. Once in high school I had a crush on this guy and every one of my friends seemed to know that I liked him before I realized it. As far as what can be said of my love life it hasn't gone well.

I remember one boy I fell in love with on sight. He was tall, blonde, athletic, and really smart. He flirted with me and I flirted with him, we competed for the highest grade in the class. (Nerd love, cute right?) It was really nice, he gave me his number when I didn't give him mine. He sat around a bunch of kids that were absolutely cruel to me. (They threw paper balls at me and change if they couldn't do the paper.) I didn't want one of them getting my number and pranking me all the time. We texted, chatted, we never actually arranged for a real date but we texted all summer after school let out. Then one day during one of our chats he tells me that he got laid. (High school guy, real proud of it.) And I was shocked. I told him that I thought he liked me and his response was "You were serious?" Apparently all of the kids he sad around put him up to flirting with me. The fact that I actually liked him was just a bonus to their amusement.

I tried to keep a tight grip on my heart after that so it wouldn't get away form me again because that hurt. That was nothing compared to the hurt I go through now and time just doesn't seem to be moving fast enough for me. But I guess you can't really expect heart break to heal very quickly. It just ever seems to work out...

One of my friends had a crush on me, every few months he reminds me. He is good with words, and when I say that I don't mean poetry I mean debating. He could convince a group of high schoolers to do jut about anything and he ha been trying to convince me to go out with him and I really just don't want to. Whenever we hang out together someone mistakes us for siblings because of how much we look and act alike. I know he really cares but I am just not that into him, thankfully he met this girl over the internet who lives up in Maine. He'll visit her soon and see if they hit it off. Ironically after he first tells me about this girl in Maine somehow the conversation shifts and (admittedly, with the help of a friend of mine) I realize that he is trying to pressure me into going out with him!

I don't care how many of the same interests we have, when I say I'm not going to go out with you I mean it!

Well, enough of boys and the sad issues in life....

I bought a car!!!

It is my first car EVER so I'm really excited. It's a used, black KIA, it's so cool I absolutely love it! It's got tan, cloth interior and a huge trunk to carry anything I could possibly want! (Seriously, it could fit like three people! Knowing how cheap and carless some of my friends are some of them might just squeeze back there for a ride.) It is currently sitting in the driveway, I wish they would have washed it while the car place had it. My first sentence ever calling it 'my car' was: "My car needs a wash."

I'll post pictures of it soon enough, today was busy and I didn't get the chance to photograph it.

Today I went to my grandfather's third wedding! (Though first one I went to.) You know, on the list of things you'll do in life going to your grandfather's wedding is not really on that list but I went. MY grandfather is 84 and the bride will be 60 soon. I was kind of disappointed when the bride and groom on the cake looked young, I was hoping they'd have an old couple on the cake but sadly it was not so. I met the bride's daughter and we had fun, she seems interested in my brother, I say good for him but she's 10 year older so.... Well at least he is interested right back.

Not much to say about the wedding, my brother made me over an hour late but we got to sing and dance and eat so I didn't feel we missed much. If I came out of the experience with anything it was a reminder of how much I hate pantyhose! The stuff is just awful! Next time I'll buy some thigh high stockings and some sexy garters to hold them up or something. It'll be something lacy, I promise.

My mother got wasted, that was a hock, everybody was worried because she needed to drive herself home but she made it just fine. Had I known she was driving herself before I got into my dads car I wouldn't have allowed it. My family was clever to shoo me into a moving car before telling my that my mother was driving herself....

Not sure what else to say at the moment. I think I covered everything for now. Tonight I'm up late, I'll finish my latest book and take the first drive every in my BRAND NEW used CAR to the bookstore! ... I'm a reading addict >.< before I had a car if I couldn't convince someone to drive me I'd bike ride five miles in the Florida heat just to get there then five miles back to go home a read it... I'll need to keep up the bike rides now so I don't get lazy or fat.

I wonder how many 'adults' are reading addicts or am I just an exception?

 

[Rudolph Quin]

Actually, I think your being a reading addict as a minor was an exception - there are plenty of adults who have the affliction. We have a group called Bibliophiles R Us and we have meetings every Tuesday and Thursday at 8 to discuss our urges and help quell them...after which we all pile into vans and assault the tomes and paperbacks at the local Barnes & Noble. It's a bonding experience...

I'd give you a pamphlet, but as you can imagine, there is some difficulty with the more zealous of our members where it concerns any reading material.

Anyways, congrats on the new car. Like, FINALLY, yeah?

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Hahaha! Nice >.< But I'd cry if the poor defenseless books at my favorite store were assaulted!

As to the car, it really is. I feel kind of bad about the car because my brother and I were shopping together and it was out of his price range but it was in mine.... so I kind of bought the car he wanted >.< Though I don't have my license yet! I blame him. My friends and his friends would ask me why I haven't gotten it and one answer explained it all. "Well, I was learning how to drive in Dad's car... then Jon happened." and they all under stood.

What had happened was my brother had gotten into a really bad accident, if he hadn't sped up to avoid the car then it would have hit him drivers side and killed him. There was a stop sign placed so far back you couldn't see around the corner and he was following his friend. His friend went and he stopped at the sign, then he went up to the road and stopped again but a woman in a jeep or something saw him coming up to the road, overreacted, and swerved towards my brother's car thinking he was going to go but he wasn't. Seeing her coming he tried to get out of the spot before her car hit his. It managed to only hit the back of his car but it was a nasty, nasty dent. Wouldn't you know there was a witness that agreed that she had overreacted but he fled when they called the cops to report it. Bastard >.> THEN THEY TRIED TO CHARGE MY BROTHER FOR RUNNING A STOP SIGN! BASTARDS!

His car was totaled and call me bitter but I can't feel all that bad for him. To me it just seems like Karma because he shouldn't have been there at that time. My brother and his friend were judging a debate tournament I was involved in (free entry if you bring a judge). We are waiting to hear who won what (that takes like two hours) and my brother comes up and asks if I can find a ride with someone else because he wants to go. I'm shocked because he is supposed to be my ride. He's my BROTHER after all. I try and convince him to stay and when that fails I ask around all of my friend who drive but none of them can give me a ride home. I tell him this and he goes off somewhere. About ten minutes later I get a text message. "You're getting a ride home with Mr. Hall." Mr. Hall is my teacher! I got really mad and started texting him because it was humiliating to have to get a ride home from my teacher because my brother decided to abandon me. I called him a Bastard. Then he texted that he got hit. Then I called him a lying bastard. Then he texted me the picture of his car's dent.

All I can say I that if he hadn't been such an asshole and dumped me on my teacher, if he had taken me home twenty minutes later like he was supposed to then that wouldn't have happened! See? A touch of karma. If he had just waited for the awards to be over then he wouldn't have gotten hit, his car wouldn't have bee totaled, he wouldn't have had to go to court, he wouldn't have had to use dad's car, mom and dad wouldn't have been so frustrated at him for not doing anything with his car and would not have been so short with me, and, on top of all else, he wouldn't have taken the car I was using to practice and I would have my license!

Funny how things work like that isn't it?

Well, today I had my first day of college! Yay! I had to care a load of HEAVY books al over while we loved for a parking pass for my car but I still had fun times ^.^

My first class is Health, the teacher is really cool, he is 60 with a (surprisingly convincing) comb over. He is really cool. He actually had us go around the class, say our name, age and what we were studying. It was kind of childish but cool. I learned I have a kid from Vietnam in my class. I have to say I like the look. My teacher told us a bit about the draft. Apparently they used a lottery technique first, like bingo I think only there would be a birthday on all the balls and they would recruit you by your birth day. My teacher said that his birthday was the first birthday called.

Between classes I had the best time! At first I felt all lost puppy and alone type thing because I had two hours and nothing to fill it. (My class even let out early so even more time.) I wanted to get a coffee drink but after I put down my books and purse I really didn't want to pick them back up again and if I left them they were likely to get stolen. So I just sat and moped a bit. I tried to go on my lap top but it wasn't working so I drew a picture and then I sat around eavesdropping on another groups conversation. Apparently someone his Justin Bieber (Yay~!) (Oh come on, will you really tell me this is a boy?) and they were like ten years older then I was, they were saying how their style is so different form high school and how they think it's stupid to still be wearing high school cloth now that you're in college. I have to say I looked down at my cloths and was a bit sad. When they all left I was sad again because at least listening to them had been interesting.

Then this other guy comes up and he asks if I can sit with me. He looked soooooo familiar I had to say yes just so I could stare and try and figure out who he was. then I remembered and said. "Hey. You dated my friend." and he says "Who?" and I tell him who and he was all like "Yeah, it didn't end well." and I said. "I remember. You're dating Amanda now right?" (Utterly fascinating isn't it?

) and he said. "Yeah but I think she is going to break up with me. She keeps saying 'We need to have a talk'." and I was sad because I liked the two of them as a couple. (My friend Amanda has a facial deformity, it is minor but noticeable. It's so sad because she is the sweetest person. She is also likely to be too proud to get it surgically fixed.) So I notice he has a HUGE coffee drink and I was like O-face "Can I have some!" and he was like. "Yeah sure. They gave me a free donut with it. I don't want it but it came free, you want it?" and I was all like. "Ohmigawd! I loooove you!!" and then he pulls out this big lap top and as I sipped his coffee drink and ate his donut I was like. "Hey... can you fix my lap top?" and he looked up and said, "Oh, yeah, sure." and I was all like, "Nya! I LOVE you! You are like my hero today!" so I ate his donut and drank some of his coffee while he fixed my computer ^-^ it was great.

Then this girl with pink hair comes up and we start talking and all I can do is stare at her head. No lie, bubble gum pink EVERYWHERE! Then she asked me if she could give me a... Tifa hug I think she called it. Not sure what that was I asked and he (Mr. Awesome) laughed and she explained that it's an anime character that sneaks up behind people she is meeting and hugs them by reaching around them and squeezing their boobs... while squeezing her boobs to demonstrate... a few times... okay more then a few times... Yes, there was a lot of her squeezing her boobs in my face. I was quite confused.

(Assessing the fact that I have had neither a boyfriend or a girlfriend and seem to have no serious preference (other then serious hots for smart guys. Serious, there is this kid in my math class that looks like a total nerd and I was mad I wasn't sitting closer >///<) I am deciding to classify myself as pansexual. Love is love and lust is lust. Anyways, we had a brief discussion about anime and such and about the upcoming anime con (CHIBIPA! I love it, always close to home ^-^) and she went off to "Return books to her lover" knowing this girl briefly I couldn't be sure if she was serious...

Anyways, sadly, it came time for my next class and Mr. Awesome showed me where it was and I met my math teacher. He had an accent I am unfamiliar with. It is sort of french, sort of American, sort of something else. Anyways, he is a very up tight and together man. he walked back and fourth in front of the class, I'm not sure what to make of him. It seems to me that as long as I do well he will be a good teacher but if I do poorly I will hate him... if that makes any sense at all... Oh, and he has a nice ass ^-^ other then that I have no interest in either of my teachers thus far.

I have the two guys on Monday and Wednesday and two girls who I will meet tomorrow on Tuesday and Thursday. The boys are on late days, the girls are on early mornings. I'll explain that more tomorrow. I really need to get to sleep. Good night everyone, sweet dreams.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

Pansexual, eh? õ_o

Sounds like an interesting first day. Meeting lots of people with very intriguing personalities. Hopefully tomorrow will yield just as good results.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Yes, pansexual, I'm in college, that means that I can safely experiment without my parents throwing a fit. Besides, I think my aunt is a lesbian but she refuses to admit it to herself and it old and sort of alone. The sort of is because she has a neighbor she is really close to and she helps raise her daughter. The neighbor is a single mother.

Anyway's. Yay! Day two!

Awful!

Today started at 6am. I was up late last night talking to a friend of mine and I got to bed at 3am so I only had three hours of sleep. I wake up and I get dressed and ready and one of my three rings I wear as well as my watch was missing! I'm a creature of habit! I wear one necklace, always the same necklace, one pair of earings, (recently changed but I'm consistently wearing the new ones) three rings, always on the same fingers and a watch. I need to have them because I've got sort of a nervous tick where when I need to fidget I fidget with my jewelry.

So I'm like flipping out because I'm going to be late and I can't find my things so then my mom starts yelling at me which is totally unfair! I realized rather recently how much I am like her and when I flip out it is exactly the way that she flips out and she yells at me for what I Do. And you know what happens when I point this out to her? She practically throws a temper tantrum! "Do! We are not alike! Stop making excuses! When I was your age I was skinny! I had a job! I was productive! I had a boyfriend! I actually did things with my day! I had friends!" and so on. (Does she just sound like a wonderful person?) One day I made the mistake of trying to explain basic psychology and how by acting the way she does I unconsciously learned to handle my emotions the way my mother (the woman who raised me) handled her emotions. And she flips and throws out lines like. "Stop making excuses! Quit trying to blame me! I didn't teach you that! You control yourself!" and I was like. "Yes, I can change it but I've got you set as my default." then she throws a fit and turns on the music to end the conversation. (Its really funny because she fumes for a while and when she has to blow off steam she will turn off the radio to make a comment then turn it back on after she is done. This usually happens about four times.)

So I get to class and find that my class is in the same building as my Heath class and even in the same hall. So I get there at the same time this cute guy was. He isn't cute by popular standards but I think he is cute. Something about the combination worked. He's got blonde hair, he's tall, lanky, tan. His nose is kind of big (Think skinny jewish nose.) and his face seems a bit concave but (while I realize this doesn't sound like it) I think he's attractive.

Well, anyways, we stood outside the door looking in the window and saw the teacher in the class talking. So we looked at each other and wondered oiut loud what was going on. Sometimes I get there and the previous class hasn't let out yet so we were wondering of that was the case, then we checked out watches, (I have a back up watch, it's got Tinkerbell on it ^-^ (Real adult right :dodgy) and schedules and saw that cl;ass hadn't started yet so he was like. "What do you do?" and I told him. "You go in and see what's up." and he responded with "You want me to be the guinea pig?" and I nodded enthusiastically. so he walks in and the teacher greats him, I hesitate in the doorway and he says. "Yeah, I'm the guinea pig." and we both go in and sit with one chair between us.

Wouldn't you notice this attractive girl sits in that seat! I was irritated >.> I mean, in high school I had a crush on this guy, we sat close to each other then this new girl came to class. She was beautiful, she had her hair straight and had really good taste in clothing. She was really nice. One day I left the class and cried in the bathroom because I was so frustrated and she came in to see if I was okay. I didn't even know her name. Well, anyways, as time went on I noticed her spending more and more time with the guy I liked until one day I saw them holding hands. Then this new girl that sat between us, also black, also attractive, though she wears her hair in long loose curls, comes and sits between us! The girl seems nice, in fact, I'm quite sure that she is. She has a visual impairment where she has to have every paper that the class gets handed in larger font. (I've noticed people who have it harder tend to be nicer.) We didn't talk much. The teacher was cool, a woman with three kids. The teacher had it hard going through college but not much interesting to say about her. I spoke to the girl behind me briefly a few times. She seems nice too.

Status: Day 2. No bitches.

Anyways, when class ends I notice that my next class is in the same room. You'd think that would be cool but it means I have to sit for over two hours! I got up and got a snack. Miss Potential Boy Thief asked me where I got it and I directed her to the place, the teacher let her go because she was about to pass out without something to eat. (Possible anorexic? She didn't seem skinny enough.) So we get through the second class and I have never watched a clock closer!

It is not that the teacher isn't nice it is that she reminds me of this girl I was friends with before she turned out to be a man stealing whore. No, that is not an insult, it is a fact. She enjoys sex with her boyfriends and does not care if she takes them form someone else.

Last summer I got a call from her asking if she wanted to go on a trip to Disney with her, her boyfriend and his friends. You know, I knew this would be trouble, I really did, but I wanted to go to Disney. I should have listened to myself... Well, the trip was planned a month in advance. (Lets play a game. I'm going to list everything that should have warned me before hand that this trip was going to end badly. Here is the first. Hint towards disaster 1: Her relationships usually last a week or two, sometimes they last longer if she is having sex with him.) So when I go to meet them to set up the plans I notice that he is like a younger version of the last boy she tried to go out with. He turned her down. She had tried to steal him away while him and his girlfriend were having a fight. (See? Not an insult, man stealing whore.) So this guy she is dating is so much like the guy that turned her down I want to introduce them because I think they'd make good friends. That is really saying something considering the guy I'm comparing him to is an asshole and is hardly nice to anyone. (Have you seen it yet? Hint towards disaster 2: The boy is way to much like the guy that turned her down.) So I go there and the two of us share a room. (Thank god this was before she started snoring.)

So (Hint towards disaster 3) she was short with me the entire time we were alone together. But the parks were fun. Her boyfriend brought his two best friends. One of them was short and chunky and the other one was tall and cute. Naturally which one do I want to hang out with? But (Hint towards disaster 4) every time I started to talk to one of the three guys she suddenly had something to say to them and would cut me off and get in between us. She seemed to be planning something (Hint towards disaster 5) she kept trying to pair up me and her boyfriend! Sure, under other circumstances I would have liked him but I am not a man stealing whore.

It was awful!

I mean, can you imagine you friend constantly choosing her boyfriend's best friend to pair with on the rides and then pairing you up with her boyfriend? I guess she was trying to fix us up so that she could date his friend but there were two problems with her plan. Even if I liked him he was dating someone and even if he liked me he was dating someone. All in all things ended poorly.

Anyways. So this teacher reminds me of the man stealing whore, as nice as she seems it is going to be difficult to get past that.

Well after class I met this girl who was an amazing artist, I started talking to her, she does realistic, I',m more of an anime person so it was kind of cool. I text my mom and tell her to take her time getting me because I had already called her. I wanted her to go do something while I made friends with this girl. (New lost puppy at college, it's nice to have a friend.) So I chat with her for nearly an hour when my mother walks in! Oh my god I was humiliated! I did my best not to let it show but wouldn't you know she has to come over and sit next to me? Now she gets me to leave and I get home, sleep for 5 hours and then chill. I'll say more later, bye for now ^-^

 

[Nathanromml]

Wow...you do like to write about yourself, don't you?

 

[Cheshire Pup]

I like to write and I like to tell stories. Period. In this the topic does happen to be myself so yes, I will write about myself when I am the topic. When I am not the subject I put just as much effort into writing about other things.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

I came home with a head ache that has yet to go away. I'll report on day 3 tomorrow. Likely after a nice nap.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

So I've been a bit depressed lately, one of the reasons I haven't been keeping up with my entries...

I cried over him again. I don't even know why this time. It was just something stupid where I remembered something and then I began to cry again. I can't believe I am still crying over him. I think I know what it was. I was just thinking about something, I forget what it was. Then I remembered something I found so tragic I burst into tears. I loved him. I still do and I never told him so. I have no interest in the guys I have mentioned in here. The blonde hasn't even glanced my way and oddly every time I glanced his he became less and less attractive. I met a guy who spent nine years of his life terminally ill. He went off for an experimental treatment that made him better.

And still I think of him. It seems like it doesn't matter what I do I still think of him and I still cry over him. Because I am a curious person one day after I finished crying over him I looked down at the pillow I had been crying into and you could see my tears. I came up with something from that. I call it The things we tell our pillows. That was when I only cried briefly, I have other images from when I cried a very long time.... He is the first guy I ever cried over. When he left I was completely caught off guard. I had no idea that a heart could hurt as much as mine did. I had no idea that someone could hurt that deeply with that kind of pain.... He promised that time would make it better but time is really slow and I keep slipping back.

I went to an anime convention today. It was cool. I got a picture of myself commissioned.. I called up some friends top go with me and it turned out that they were already there so I met up with them there.I kept wondering why they didn't call me before they went but I tried not to think about it. Then they left me there so I had to solicit a ride from strangers. It was awful! Thank goodness there was nice people there because I ended up getting a ride with someone I didn't even know. He turned out to be a cool guy who knew my brother, they work together. We had fun chatting and there was one very strange moment where he says. "I can't wait to tell you're brother, 'Hey dude, you've got a hot sister.'"

It was such a strange moment for me because I realized that no one has said I'm hot other then that guys who has a crush on me and that isn't saying much because first of all he is like 300lbs and secondly we look so much alike people confuse us for siblings so I never took him seriously. Then I have this guy, total stranger, calling me hot. I couldn't tell if he was serious or joking but I like to think he was serious. It's nice to have people find you attractive...

And now I have come full circle because again I remember the man who broke my heart. Well, that is all for tonight. I might journal tomorrow. I don't know. Like I said I've been really depressed lately... I'll see how things go in the future.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

"The Things We Tell Our Pillows". Sounds like one of those anonymous rant sites(you know, like "Not Always Right" or "Ruined My Day") except...emo version or something.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Yeah, I guess it does. It would make a good title for some crappy teen angst book. Or maybe, depending on the author, a good one. I don't know, my mood doesn't seem to be picking up any time soon...

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Well, I realize I haven't filled you guys in on my life in a while (Not that many of you guys really care) so I decided I might as well fill you in.

My reading addition is ending cold turkey, it is quite difficult and I could easily continue it if I wasn't such a stubborn person. Yes, I'm a stubborn person, I will admit that. I will admit all of my faults because I have them because I'M HUMAN. So sue me. I will make mistakes and Fuck You if you expect me to be perfect. Anyways (on the last note I read a really good quote, "Finding your soulmate is not about finding the perfect person, it is about finding an imperfect person you love so much that in your eyes they are perfect." Cute huh?) the other night I actually had a nightmare fitting of the kinds of things people roleplay in here.

In my nightmare I was abducted by a man, there was another girl there and he had already 'trained' her to do what he wanted. He had her give him a blow job while driving. I looked away. I knew he was going to do the same thing with me but I didn't know when. In a strange, twisted we he seemed to care about the two of us. He brought us to places we would have fun, like Arcades and gocarts and such, but he would always take us away before staying to long, we traveled a lot. At one of the arcades I faked an injury so that they would take me away to check on me and I could tell someone what was happening and hopefully get away. There was a detective there, he worked for the police, he checked me over but the man was there too. I pleaded with the detective with my eyes, to frightened to speak but preying he would see my fear and take me away from the man so I could tel him what was happening. He didn't notice and the man took me back to the car. There was another girl, she was hitchhiking, I tried to warn her away form this man but the first girl make me shut up. While the newest girl was sleeping the first girl told me that in two days "break day" would come. She told me that when it came for her it had been the worst day of her life.

Thankfully I woke up before it came and I was utterly terrified. I couldn't even think of anything remotely sexual. Thankfully a friend of mine form here talked me through it so I wasn't scared anymore. I spent hours after waking up being just terrified.

The holidays are coming up! Most people who read this will be confused but see it is the Jewish holidays that are coming up. The Jewish New Year and the day we fast. It is on a different day every year so it is difficult to keep track of. Why? Well, for some reason I don't yet know, the Jewish calendar follows the moon instead of the sun. (Strange huh? Well, look at that, you learned something new.) My dad is unreasonable. The world doesn't stop for Jewish holidays like it does for Christian ones. I don't blame the world for it, the world has a lot bigger issues then not worshiping my holidays, hell, that isn't even a world issue, that would be my issue because I just need to figure out a way to work my schedule around it. My father thinks everything we do should stop for the holidays. He thinks my brother should QUIT HIS JOB so he can go to temple Friday night. I dislike him greatly. >.>


Well, back to my suffering reading addiction, the reason it is suffering is because I am stubborn. While buying the last book currently out I noticed another book seemingly by the author of the book I was reading with a story involving the characters inside so next time I get money I can buy it. So I do.... It turns out to be a sort story book with only ONE story from the author I am reading. I am stubbornly refusing to read any of those other stories even if I would like them simply for the fact that I might not. (I know it is unreasonable but then again why do I have to be? It is my book and no one is being harmed by my not reading any other author.) I am currently hung up on three authors. Jim Butcher, Kimberly Frost and Charlaine Harris. Jim Buther writes about a wizard in modern day Chicago (I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE (I can go on but I'll stop) The Dresden Files. With passion I love this series. I will recommend this series to EVERYONE (and do) and this is the only series I will loan books out for simply so other people can love it as much as I do.) Kimberly Frost writes about a witch in modern day Duvall, Texas but her powers don't really work all that well and there is a sexy wizard there who is constantly trying to get with her (and sometimes succeeding) and a host of other fun. (I love this book but this series is my guilty pleasure. This is better then anything and those that know me in person would be SHOCKED to know I like a series like this. If you're not a girl you simply won't enjoy it. If you're not a girl who likes Guys you won't enjoy it as much.) Charlaine Haris is my latest addiction, her series is about a telapath in modern day northern Louisiana who gets mixed up with some vampires and it is cool because in the story the Japanese have developed a synthetic blood that fills all the vampires "nutritional needs" so vampires went public with their existence. It is so much fun. All three of them are fun. There is one more book out by Harris but it is another book of short stories only this book is supposed to be filled with only stories about the characters in her series. I will check and buy it the moment I can get my hands on the cash.

While suffering a lack of reading material by the authors I like I have gotten back into writing. I am coming up with a story idea. I'll tell you guys, I would love to hear what you think so if anyone is reading this please feel free (or obligated) to comment (whichever makes you respond.)

• • • • Some question are just better left unanswered, especially the bigger ones. Questions like: "Who am I?" "Why am I here?" and
        "What will happen when I die?" Unfortunately I know the answer to all three of them and it isn't nearly as profound as you'd
        think. Who am I? Nivy Davis. Why am I hear? To learn how to not suck at my job. What will I do when I die? Go back to that
        job I previously mentioned. Now, you might be asking, "Nivy, what kind of job will you be doing after you die?" and it is a
        good question. After I die I will go back to my job, working in Hell for Death.

Well, what do you think? I call it "Forced Living Vacation." Nivy Davis is a teenage girl who has just had life's biggest questions answered with unexpected results, all her life she has been able to see ghosts all her life and has been very good with children. As it turns out she is even more different then she thought. Before see was born she was a "Piper" and her job was to bring children's souls to heaven or hell. However, instead of calming the children like she was supposed to she ends up scaring enough of them that those that worked with her force her to be born so she'll learn what to do not to scare the dead children that she is supposed to be helping. I've got some plans for it. Death runs hell, he isn't as mean as you'd think, he has a gay lover, lots of fun stuff. Tell me what you guys think.

I have been working on my drawing to but I am very critical of myself so I never really like the way they turn out. Other then that I haven't much else to say. I look forward t your comments and I'll hopefully update everyone again soon.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

I should be sleeping but I'm not. I am tired but at the same time I am not. I have been up all night reading an online web comic. There is a story below each strip that tells so much more then the comic. I love it. It is addicting but I worry. Each comic i dated and I am reading things written seven years ago. I worry that if I check to see if I is still going I will find that it isn't and, like many web comics, that it never had a complete end. I don't like worrying about these things when I try and enjoy myself. I have been having trouble enjoying myself lately. I keep having head aches in one concentrated spot. I wonder if I should be worried. Some kind of blood clot in my brain or even a tumor or something. Probably just paranoia from the doctor shows I have gotten into. Still. I am up late, sitting in the dark with my little net book typing out random streams of barely conscious thought. I should be resting. I start getting ready for classes in 50 minutes. It usually takes that long for me to get to sleep.

I don't sleep well lately, little concerns bog down my brain and my bed isn't as comfortable as it used to be. My legs always seem hot and it is the strangest feeling. I don't know. I'm tired and typing things without thinking. I just came to my senses and deleted a few sentences after realizing what I was saying. Not that saying this will really matter, I could say nothing and no one would ever know. That is if they even read this.

Well, I know someone is reading this, the views go up. I keep stopping by, checking the journals forum and watching mine drop lower and lower on list. I asked for replies and I don't get any, I don't ask and I do. Things are funny that way. Tomorrow I'll be spending a lot of time at college, it is so strange. I have begun to hang out with a group of people. For a second today I actually thought of them as a family, it was so strange I paused in what I was doing. I should reread my journal and figure out exactly how I was adopted into them because I can't seem to remember the details. I know I was with them before my friend form high school showed up. She still has the same scars she did in high school. I guess that makes sense but every time I see them I wonder what made them and can never find the time to ask.

My brother's friend has something wrong with his face. It isn't like scares but it twitches sometimes, his cheeks, it is strange to watch. Once I asked why but someone spoke before he could answer and they said. "You have no tact do you?" I do. Really, honestly I do but I have known him for three years and have never found out why. I asked my brother once. It turns out his nose was broken twice so maybe a muscle or nerve is pinched? I don't know but I am nervous about asking again.

40 minutes till I prepare for classes and still no sleep. My and my brother were close friends for a very long time but shit happened. I don't like it when shit happens. I hate it. If shit never happened I would be perfectly okay. He was friends with my brother and another boy. I became friends with this girl and she fell for him because she said he looked like John Lennon. (probably mispelled the name but at 5:21 am I don't care) So she started talking to them but she approached him when the three of them were together and my brothers other friend fell for her. So Tom (not really his name but I will call him that) fell for her but she fell for Dave. (his name isn't Dave, it's much cooler.) So while she flirted with Dave Tom flirted with her but she didn't like Tom. She liked Dave, Tom was too tall (not being picky but he was over a foot taller then her) and Dave had a beard that she loved so Tom grew a beard. When she and Dave started dating Tom still flirted with her. He got her presents and stuff but she didn't love him, she loed Dave and she told him so. She didn't want to lead him on.

Tom and Dave stopped being friends because Tom couldn't just stop loving her. Tom got into drugs and started smoking. Dave went off to college and they kept dating. At college sometimes he would drink and she didn't like that, sometimes they got into fights over it. Then eventually she relaxed and she started doing it too. When she admitted this to Dave he flipped and they fought and broke up. Then she got really into drinking and drugs and started dating Tom who had never stopped loving her. ow they both go and do weird drugs (like 'weird Chinese acid' and such) and my brother still hangs out with them. As far as I knew my brother was just going as the sober guy but why would a big brother tell his little sister what he was really doing?

One day Dave was giving me a ride home from DnD because my brother had dropped me off to go to work and he was able to vent the whole story to me. It turned out that my brother was doing shit with them. Not perverted things but the drug and alcohol stuff. After watching his former best friend go down that route and his girlfriend go down that route he didn't want to see his best friend go down that route so he stopped being friends with him. Dave can be an asshole at times but strangely enough while he was venting he seemed like a real good guy. it is a shame I likely won't see more of that side of him.

30 minutes until I start getting ready for morning classes. I can hardly believe I started writing this 20 minutes ago. I haven't been paying attention, I don't know how long this thing is yet, maybe I am just moving slow because I am tired, maybe not. Whatever it is I am here and I a stringing together random thoughts and committing them to type for any member of this site to read. It seems like a strange thing to do. Well, whatever, I am doing it and it feels good to just let myself spill out through my fingertips.

I'm a bit disappointed no one has commented on my story idea, I was really looking forward to feedback but I guess I am in the wrong forum for it. But then again it isn't s story yet and maybe I am not reading enough stories in there but it doesn't seem like people give feedback for the stories there. I guess you just have to judge how popular you are by the number of views.

I don't know. I like being able to spill myself out online because I don't have to pretend to be something I am not. The birds are singing outside my window even thought it is still dark at 5:37 in the morning. When I am with people I am strong. At least I try and look it. I am someone you can come to with all of your problems, someone who won't judge you and will help you no matter what. I am someone who does not like to see people hurt and doesn't care how weird you are as long as you are kind at heart. But inside I am not so strong. Inside I am quiet and sad and scared and hurt. Inside I am hurt and closer to tears then I feel safe admitting. While I am in public I dig my nails into the skin of my thumb to hold back the tears, forcing myself to look strong. If I look strong people think I am strong and they don't try and hurt me. Sometimes I hate the way the world works but I cannot hate the world.

It is our responsibility as people to be strong and to change what we do not like. You cannot hate the world for being what it is, you can change to world to being what you wan it to be with strength and determinations. It is hard. People do not like to change, the world will not like to change but if you try hard enough you can make anything happen. I do not want to change the world but the people that live on it. I want people to be kind to other people, to stop seeking out ways to hurt them. I want people to be kind to those less fortunate to them and help each other and to stop looking out only for themselves. Utopia. I want it. But people cannot always have what they want.

I want him to talk to me but that will not happen. I want to know what exactly happened to Amelia Earhart but that will not happen. I want to be loved. Who doesn't?

15 minutes until I have to get ready for classes. I will drive to my classes, I should not be driving with such little sleep, that is if I even get to sleep now. And still random streams of thoughts spill out through my finger tips all over my tiny keyboard. I will look back on this later and maybe feel embarrassed, maybe sad, maybe even take it down but now it is so late that you could say it is early. When does it stop being late and start being early? To late for one day and to early for the next? The world is a strange place. People are strange but if we were not how would we deal with each other? If I ever met someone who was not strange I would think that they were strange just because of how normal they were. Everyone is strange. No one is normal. That is just the way I like it.

10 minutes until I get ready for classes. Good night. Good morning. Sweet dreams.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

About your story idea: You really don't want to know what I think. But I wish you good luck with it out of a distant need to be polite.

And you want a utopia? I hear they've got something pretty close to it in China. You missed the train on Soviet Russia though. But seriously, lighten up a little. You can choose to always be the strong one, but it's not going to give you what you want, if you want to be happy. You'll be safe though and if you're willing to settle for that... Pain is not the opposite of life.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

>///> You know this should really teach me a lesson about posting tired ramblings online at damn near 6am.

For those wondering, no, I did not get any sleep and no, I did not get to drive to school the next day. However, ironically, being sleep deprived made me pay more attention to my classes today then I had before. However I also did several rather silly things such as during classes, there was a binder check I wasn't ready for but the time ran out before my group had to present ours for checking so once I got out of the classroom I raised my airs to the sky and called out "The time gods have smiled upon me today!" in a rather crowded hallway... And while I was hanging out with friends I realized my watch matched my shirt (I have a tinkerbell watch >.> I can't find my serious one, my shirt also had tinkerbell on it) and I called out rather loudly "Holy shirt my watch matches my shirt!" .... sleep deprived me is very interesting...

<.< While I thank you for your well wishes I believe a utopia is more of an ideal to be worked towards but an unattainable one. However, if you constantly work towards perfection you may come out with something pretty close. I know that pain is not the opposite of life. It be in pain shows that you are living because only the people that truly live their lives allow themselves to be hurt. If I were to hide behind my computer screen and never speak to anyone I would never get hurt but it is because Ihave been out there, because I have been living I am hurting and hoping that it will fade. What would you suggest then if I want to be happy? Have you found your key to happiness?

Also, Curse you Padan! Now even if I delete it you have my post preserved! >.>

 

[Rudolph Quin]

My key to happiness... This is your journal about you. Nevermind.

~

 

[Cheshire Pup]

My key to happiness... This is your journal about you. Nevermind.

~

Oh come on! I want to know!

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Damnit. I want to write out another nice 'little' rant about my family pissing me off, my father's bitching and the holidays. I should have started it sooner. Within three hours I have gone from being perfectly healthy to being hot and cold at the same time, unbelievable ill and pretty much bed bound. I will have to do it tomorrow. If I am not on tomorrow I am either hospitalized or dead.

I haven't felt this bad since I caught pneumonia and had to be hospitalized for it.

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Well it's it nice to know that no one cares.

I'm still sick and it royally sucks! First I had a fever and I practically swaddled myself in blankets and fell asleep until my fever finally broke. I spent about 4 hours healthy before I caught a cold which I have had off and on since then! For the love of god it is like Pestilence has taken up residence in my guest room! On top of that I keep coughing and sometimes when I speak it sounds funny. Have you ever had a cough and a headache at the same time? It fucking hurts! *Cough* Oww! *Cough* Oww! *Cough* Oww! I so very much hate being sick!

Well, I finally seem to be getting better which is a good thing. Though I am actually considering cleaning up my room. My mother is slightly racist and slightly sexist and refuses to admit it. She says things like "You're a young lady! You are supposed to have a clean room!" She has been saying this all through out my teenage years and I have not met a teenager, boy or girl, who kept their room clean... Then again being eighteen I only have like two years to use that excuse so I might as well get started cleaning now.

I'm loosing weight! 5 pounds this week ^-^ I'm excited, through a combination of lots of water, frequent trips of three flights of stairs and sleeping in Florida with two quilts (and sometimes a heating pad) I have managed to loose it! ... big woop right? Not really. It is only five pounds but if I keep this up then hopefully I will continue to loose, of course the season of eating is upon us. What is the season of eating you may ask? Well it stats like this:

First we have Halloween where we send our small children out into the neighborhood in the dark dressed in clothing no one will recognize and instruct them to visit every stranger and pedophile in our neighborhood and ask them for candy. And we eat pounds of candy.

Then we have Thanksgiving where we celebrate how the Indians saved us form starving by teaching us their ways. This is of course before we spread plague and enslaved them, working them to death and stealing their land. And we eat pounds of starches.

And then we have Christmas where we celebrate the birth of a cosmic Jewish zombie who is not yet a zombie because he is just a baby whose mother accepts gifts form strangers. Having this baby without sex I can't imagine her being happy about this. Really, think about it. "What... what do you mean I'm pregnant? An angel? And angel got me pregnant and I didn't feel it? What do you mean I don't get to feel it? I get to have this Angel's bastard child and I don't even get to enjoy the sex?! Is his winged ass going to come down here and help me raise him? NO! Does he know they stone people for things like this! Angelic bastard!" And we eat starches and candies.

And then we celebrate the new year where everyone just wasted off of their ass and makes resolutions that never see the end of January of the new year. Pretty self explanatory. And if you follow it you stuff your gut with foods meant to bring you luck in the new year.

Then we have Valentine's day, a day for pretty people to feel good and those that aren't to feel bad. It is a day for couples to remind us single people out there to get our act together and find someone to bone. And we eat candies and chocolates and cakes.

Then we have Easter were we celebrate the Zombie's return to life! Of course technically they say he was a ghost but whateves. Well, we celebrate this ghost's return form the afterlife when really is is just a Pagan holiday that the Christians took over in another of their "Make the planet love Jesus" attempts. (Christmas was one too. Remember that song Deck The Halls? That Yule word that keeps coming up? "Troll the ancient Yule tide carol," "See the blazing Yule before us," and so on? Yule was the name of the Holiday that Christians took over. It explains the tree and the presents. Ever noticed that trees don't fit Jesus? It's because it wasn't him that started it.) And here we eat candies and a massive dinner.

AND THEN!!! AFTER 6 HOLIDAYS OF STUFFING OUR FACE WITH GARBAGE....... We have swimsuit season. Really. You wonder why you see all those fat girls in bikinis. They weren't that way before the holidays!

Well, anyways.

I am trying to loose weight so that I can wear a bikini because I don't one to see one of those fat chicks wearing one. I am also trying to get tanner so lots of trips to the beach in my one piece!

As far As school goes I am doing AWFUL in math. Like horrendous. Really, it's just bad. I forget to do the homework so I am not ready for the tests and I forgot to do the practice quizzes online... my teacher lost my last test (A test I completed thanks to sharp eyes and quick wits by the way) so I am hoping that he has a policy where if he cant find it them he has to give me an A because I could SOOOO use it.

I haven't been writing as much as I need to. I was to be a writer and while I have been rping a lot on other sites I need to get a solid book going again. The problem is that i had one going and then I stopped having time. I used to do it in my high school classes because they were so easy but you actually have to listen to what your teacher is saying in college. And I'm bad at planning out my time but I am getting better... slowly...

well, I'm tyring to get back into drawing, I may have something to post next time but until then, Farewell!

 

[Cheshire Pup]

Ever notice how an old movie can bring back old memories? It doesn't even have to be that old. The Good Witch is on... I'm watching it... Last time I said that to someone I was telling a good friend of mine, I was so very excited too.... It came out two years ago, I watched it the first time and I just loved it. Later, a few months later, I told my friend about it. When it came around again I was so excited, I tried to get him to watch it but I don't think he did. They even made a sequel to it and I was just ecstatic...Not anymore.

I want to relive the joy I felt hen I watched the movie the first two times but now when I watch it all I can do is think of my friend... I miss him. You'd think after as long as it's been I wouldn't miss him so much but I still do. I still find things that remind me of how much fun we had... And I didn't really get to say my goodbye. At first I tried to get him to stay but he had to go... when I was finally ready to say goodbye he was already gone... And I cried... a lot... I could tell him anything, it didn't matter what it was, I didn't have to feel ashamed telling him anything... I miss that. I miss him. It is always hard to loose a friend, the timing didn't help much either.

I was transferring out of high school and into college. In high school I always had friends that were younger then me or older then me, none my age. It's been that way since I was little. All of my older friends had graduated and didn't have much interest in hanging out with me now that they were in college. All of my younger friends are still in high school... None of them answer their phones... New friends are good but you can't invest yourself as deeply in them as you can in old friends... I miss my old friends... I miss him...

Well, all for now...

 

[Cheshire Pup]

I am sick.... Again. I'm getting sick every other weekend. And this is halloween. Not only am I to old to trick or treat, not only do I have no party t go to but I may be too sick to give out candy. I don't even like horror movies and that will be the only kind of movie on. Only one person on this site knows why. However I do not feel like telling the masses. I will say that I do not like zombie movies or ghost movies or demon movies or dream killing movies which, as you can imagine, knocks out just about every horror film in existence.... And I really like dressing up but my family has buried the costume box in the depths of our garage. I guess I shouldn't be worried, if I am to sick to hand out candy then there is no reason to get dressed up... Still... No big 18th party, no big event for Halloween. This is turning out to be a really lucky 18th year. Well, at least two Dresden Files books come out this year, that's better then nothing...