Question about NB forum

[Deante]

So I went into the NB RT forum and I noticed that a lot are stating "I play a femboy".

Is femboy a non-binary thing? I thought non-binary was a specific gender like trans-f/trans-m, intersex, genderfluid, etc. Femboy is just an effeminate man. Even if he's crossdressing, if he's identifying as M then he's M. It's the equivalent of a tomboy girl, you wouldn't put tomboy girl threads in the NB would you?

 

[JaceMerner]

This actually always bugs me, too; it feels like femboy is a specific subversion of masculine gender expression and part of the play there is that it *is* a man, just not presenting the way you expect.

Not to yuck anyone's yum, but that rubs me kind of the wrong way to lump that in with non-binary expression? It's sort of a fetishization of gender expression, rather than an exploration/dismantling of it.

I'm not here to put down fetishes, but I agree that play that is about subverting male gender expression probably should still live inside of male RTs rather than with non-binary RTs.

 

[Deante]

Also yes not putting it down--I actually am looking for femboy play. But I'd been looking for it in the M forum, and am confused why it would be in the NB.

 

[Revelations]

It is a difficult situation. I admit the NB forum could be 'better'. How that better is, can be up for debate. The bets I can say is if you feel you see a thread that belongs elsewhere, report it and the mods will discuss it and move it if we deem it appropriate.

 

[-NekoUke-]

Another forum I was on before it closed had specific sections. Male, Female, Lesbian and Gay alongside a General section. The General section was used for request threads where the partner was willing to play as any gender for their ideas, rather than specifics.

 

[Siph]

I generally interpret the NB section as for any character not stereotypically cis male or female: that includes feminine guys, girls with male genitals, tentacle aliens with a thousand different genitals, and of course non-binary people like you describe. It's far from perfect, I agree, but I think it serves its purpose in offering a separate section for atypical gender expressions. Given the relatively low activity of the NB sections, I wouldn't say it's warranted to split hairs.

Perhaps it could be renamed, but "Roleplay Requests by Characters That Don't Conform To Gender Stereotypes" is a little long and "Neither of the Above" is a bit curt.

 

[captain_bond]

What about "Roleplay Requests by Gender Non-Conforming Persons"? Not quite as long as the above suggestion. Another solution if that's still too long would be to abbreviate to its accepted acronym, which I believe is "GNC" and elaborate on that in the subheading of the thread, i.e. what is currently: "Looking for a 1x1 Roleplay and intend to write as a CHARACTER that is neither male nor female? [Ex; Futa, Hermaphrodite, Genderless alien, gender fluid goo, etc] Then make a Request Thread here!"

 

[Applestoapples]

This actually always bugs me, too; it feels like femboy is a specific subversion of masculine gender expression and part of the play there is that it *is* a man, just not presenting the way you expect.

Not to yuck anyone's yum, but that rubs me kind of the wrong way to lump that in with non-binary expression? It's sort of a fetishization of gender expression, rather than an exploration/dismantling of it.

I'm not here to put down fetishes, but I agree that play that is about subverting male gender expression probably should still live inside of male RTs rather than with non-binary RTs.

Technically isn't everything here a fetishization? True I think it should be in the male category as femboys still see themselves as men.

 

[Lord DreamCrusher]

There are femboy's that identify as male gender and, sure, those should be posted in the Male request section but what about those that identify as gender-fluid? Or some other form of non-binary? Everyone is going to have a different interpretation of every terminology used to some extent and I think this is entirely a non-issue.

A femboy can be a cisgender male, or can be female to male (FtM) transgender. They can be genderfluid non-binary, bigender, they can be bisexual, gay, straight, or pansexual, while others don't use any labels at all, which are still totally valid. Femboys can fall pretty much anywhere on the gender identity spectrum, and on the sexual orientation spectrum.

As far as I'm concerned it's just as valid to be in the non-binary section of requests as the male section depending on the writers personal interpretation and beliefs. Since I don't think it's a good idea to police everyone's character backstories to such an extent for the sake of ensuring every character is placed exactly in the 'perfect' section of the site I figure it's far better to let people make such determinations for themselves.

 

[Siph]

Technically isn't everything here a fetishization?

I wouldn't say so; there are plenty of people that enjoy playing non-binary and transgender characters, regardless of how they identify IRL, without regarding it as a fetish. It's something they enjoy writing -- and in Jace's words, exploring -- without it necessarily enticing them on a sexual/erotic level. Similar to how you could play a dark-skinned character without ever going into the BBC/blacked kink.

 

[Spitfire]

Another forum I was on before it closed had specific sections. Male, Female, Lesbian and Gay alongside a General section. The General section was used for request threads where the partner was willing to play as any gender for their ideas, rather than specifics.

I wasn't really sure that felt inclusive to me when I was on that site. When I landed on BMR, I was glad to see the NB section.

 

[Spitfire]

As for the topic of the femboy set and where it fits, I have to agree with LDC. As I understood the site when I arrived, the sections are meant to specify the sex and/or gender expression of the requesting writer. I don't know that I feel right with people policing that for individuals they don't know.

 

[Sync]

As I understood the site when I arrived, the sections are meant to specify the sex and/or gender expression of the requesting writer.

Unless I've been misunderstanding things for a very long time, the Request sections are organised according to the gender identity of the character, not the writer.

Sure, the two often go hand-in-hand, but the character is the focus, not the author.

 

[Spitfire]

Unless I've been misunderstanding things for a very long time, the Request sections are organised according to the gender identity of the character, not the writer.

Sure, the two often go hand-in-hand, but the character is the focus, not the author.

That's what I meant by gender expression. Apologies if that was unclear.

 

[Solo]

Staff has discussed this, and our stance is that everyone should have the ability to identify their characters how they see fit; gender expression is a personal thing and we welcome everyone to express who their characters are freely.

If you see a thread that you think is placed in the wrong section, feel free to report it to staff for review, but please also be aware that we consider gender identity to be a personal choice.​