Snow White and Seven Filthy Goblins [Huginn x DummieBlondie]

[Huginn]

Deep within the wilderness, away from the eyes of civilization, hidden from the villages, the kingdom, the nobles and the knights, there lived a family of goblins.

Humans, in general, had very bad opinions about goblins. They were considered evil, filthy, sadistic, manipulative and coward creatures. People were mostly right about that, so it was to be expected that the two species rarely interacted.

This family of goblins, in particular, was quite peculiar. Goblins usually lived in caves or holes on the ground, but this family found an abandoned shack, and decided to call it home.

Seven goblins, they were, all males. Since motherhood is not a goblin’s best feature, they could not know if they were related or not. Goblins were usually raised together, in the group, or simply abandoned by their mothers at a very early age. Family was an alien concept for them, but this particular seven elements decided to live together and share a home.

They were:

• Domy: The leader of the group, with a strong dominant personality.
• Baddy: The one with the worst temper.
• Bully: The humorous one, always playing tricks and funny games.
• Cocky: The strongest and biggest, physically, and the most confident one.
• Psyky: The one with a mental condition and lots of creativity.
• Sady: The one who really enjoyed watching other creatures in pain.
• Pervy: The one with a constant erection.

This shack of theirs, in spite of being away from any sign of human civilization, was well built and well located. What it lacked in furniture, and compensated in space. It had a large door (totally unnecessary for goblins), broad windows, and plenty of room inside. Just behind the shack, there was a creek, excellent source of clean water and fishing. Also good for attracting wild animals, that went to the creek for water and often found themselves caught in goblin’s trap.

Having a nice place to live, easy access to water and food, meant this goblins had time to spare, and the group became increasingly tedious. Also, having no female goblins around – after Psyky killed the last two – made them increasingly horny.

That is … until the day SHE showed up ….

 

[DummieBlondie]

Once upon a time, there lived a lovely princess with fair skin and blue eyes. She was so fair that she was named Snow White. Her mother died when Snow White was a baby and her father married again. This queen was very pretty but she was also very cruel. The wicked stepmother wanted to be the most beautiful lady in the kingdom and she would often ask her magic mirror, “Mirror! Mirror on the wall! Who is the fairest of them all?” And the magic mirror would say, “You are, Your Majesty!” But one day, the mirror replied, “Snow White is the fairest of them all!” The wicked queen was very angry and jealous of Snow White. She ordered her huntsman to take Snow White to the forest and kill her. “I want you to bring back her heart,” she ordered. But when the huntsman reached the forest with Snow White, he took pity on her and set her free. He killed a deer and took its heart to the wicked queen and told her that he had killed Snow White. Snow White wandered in the forest all night, cluelessly without knowing what to do.

When the sun shined the next morning, she came to a tiny abandoned cottage and went inside. There was nobody there, but she found seven plates on the table and seven little beds in the bedroom. She cooked a wonderful meal and cleaned the house. Eventually, the tiredness of the day won, and she finally fell asleep on one of those little beds. At night, the seven goblins who lived in the cottage came home and found Snow White sleeping.

 

[Huginn]

The goblins were greatly surprised when they saw her, as I am sure anyone would if they returned home to find a creature of another species sleeping in your bed. Imediately, Domy called them all out, to discuss what to do.

Domy himself started: “We should enslave her and order her to do all sorts of things for us.”

Baddy suggested, “I think we should beat the shit out of her.”

Bully said, “We can put worms in her ears while she’s sleeping and watch what happens.”

Cocky said, “I don’t give a damn about her.”

Psyky said, “Why not take her skin and hair and make a human disguise so we can walk into the village?”

Sady said, “I agree with Baddy, let’s beat up the bitch.”

Finally, Pervy said, “Are you all crazy? We have been here for months without a female now. When was the last time any of us fucked something that could talk? Sure, she is no goblin, just a tall, white skinned, weird human, but still, the hottest thing around. I say we keep her and do our best for her to stay. With time, I’m sure she will agree to fuck us all. We just have to be smart, not scare her away, and not kill her.”



They all had to agree. Pervy’s logic was perfect. She was a female, and they needed one. The group of short, bold, green skinned goblins went back inside.

Domy, who was the leader, tried talking to her: “WAKE UP, FEMALE HUMAN!!” He shouted.

“You invaded our property, but we are benevolent goblin, and we are willing to forgive you, if you explain yourself and tell us what the fuck you are doing here.”

 

[DummieBlondie]

Snow White jumped up as she got woke up with a sudden shout. She was surprised, and a little bit panicked when she saw the goblins in the hut. It was obvious she was afraid to face them. All her knowledge about goblins were from the spooky tales her maids were telling her when she was a little child.

She stood up and nervously took a few steps back from them as she tried to fix her dress.

"I am so sorry... I didn't know that you were living here... I was lost in the woods and just thought this cottage was abandoned. I mean, It seemed abandoned to me at least..." She looked the filth around as a gesture. Inside of the hut was literally seemed like a dumpster. She was sure that it was never cleaned since it was left by humans, and everything got worst after goblins settled in.

Snow White still couldn't be sure what to do. She knew at least taught that goblins were dangerous and evil creatures. As she tried to sweet-talk her way out of this situation, she was also trying not to make them angry and hostile to herself.

"I have prepared some food. Why don't we have some first, uh?" Snow White asked as she pointed out the pot, which was still pretty hot.

 

[Huginn]

“Food?” They asked, a little surprised, looking at the pot. They had never cooked anything. “What have you done to our food?”

Goblins had little knowledge of fire and cooking, and liked their food raw.

“You stole and ruined our food, you bitch.” Said Bady.

“I told you we should beat her up” said Sady.

They all became a little nervous, and surrounded her.

“Calm down, calm down.” Said Pervy, “It is fine, we can get more food. I’m sure the female meant well … and I’m sure she will try and compensate us for invading our home and spoiling our food.”

One of the things the goblins stared the most was her clothes. They were barely wearing anything, most of them having just a rag or animal skin, strapped around their hips, protecting their private parts. It was the first time they saw that much cloth on one individual.