Just thoughts and nonsense

[Hush]

I do not know if moderators still frequent these pages to ensure trolls do not appear unwarranted, but if one happens upon this I will state here and now. These thoughts are my own and not meant to disparage any person or group. Though I will state my own feelings unfiltered by much at all.. I will not try to upset anyone. No promises past that since even breathing can irritate some.

Speaking of. I know some do tend to read others journals since they are somewhat open. That being the case I will first speak on my own basics before delving into personal thoughts. Best way I can think of to do this is to work off the 5 W's of writing. Basic I know. But then.. So am I at times .

Who:

Been around for close to 17k worth of days so the who would take quite a bit to explain. If it helps you can consider me closely related to the badger from The Wind in the Willow in my general behaviors. I prefer my solitude. I dislike crowds. I may be a hetero man, but I try not to get embroiled in actual relationships. I enjoy reading and writing, but have little use for TV in general. If anything of a distraction I do enjoy You Tube, though even in that I am a bit eclectic in my tastes. Am I educated? Quite so. Do I show that in most things? Hardly. I am an objective person rather than subjective. That being said I have in the past dabbled with myths and legends and other philosophies derived by these things for they led to what made us who we are. There is much more to me than these small factoids. But that will come out over time.

What:

When I was first here the series of Harry Potter hadn't even been completed yet. I so dreaded the requests for Snape or other characters. I was something of a Non-Con specialist.. Not by practical experience but due the fact that there were so more challenges in writing that form compared to so many others IMO. Romance was typically drama filled and fairly A through Z in their construction. BDSM was also fairly linear, and most whom were interested in it did not even have the true concept of masochism or the feelings elicited from it, nor its mirrored reverse. A small example that would/could be overlooked would be when a bead of sweat ran along a cut. Would they react? How would they react? How did it make their character feel? With regards to these formats and all the others available.. The give and take of the cooperative writing, the details which made the stories grand, and oh so many more challenges lay within the Non Con scenes I had the pleasure to be a part of at the time. Of course there were some who did the responses of *Moans* which caused a deep irritation somewhere within my core. Or worse still. Those who used my own writings as fap material foremost rather than responding in a timely fashion. (One month or more for a response?! As DA would have put it back in the day.. Bah!)

As for the writer himself? I have been a bit of a bard throughout my life. Once a soldier, another point I worked in the educational system. Plenty happened between point A to Z in my life. More so I have forgotten than many have had the chance to learn. In that I could die happily enough. However.. I tend to never divulge knowledge to the unwilling, nor indulge curiosity for the sake of itself alone.

When:

Though previously stated I will repeat myself in that I am older than some that would frequent these posts these days. I was a member of this site in good standing close to if not more than a decade ago. I was here in the days when DA had issues with her hair being so long she could use it as a belt, a certain Hatter loving lass regaled us with stories of whose heart she broke next, Nilly being rather stoic and ofttimes grumpy, and a bevvy of under aged twits being the largest concern for us all. But that was near the beginning of the cell phone access to sites like these so hills and roundabouts I guess. No.. I state these things not to brag, but to say that aye I was here to see some of the minute changes. Nothing quite like what I see here now to be sure, but I am fairly adaptable. Though funnily enough thus far one difference I see is the lack of full pages that used to be our main writing block in the place of these smaller text boxes. Not sure if I like this or not. But I do like the enhancement tools they added and how responsive they are.

Where:

Though I was born outside the U.S. I call it my home now and have for many a year. Lived on both coasts for a time though I prefer East to West. Not due to some sentimentality, but because I find it more a challenge due to smaller facets like humidity. Don't believe me? Take someone from California, plop them in one of the Southern states like Virginia or Florida and watch them melt from sweat alone. Or the inverse if it falls upon Winter in a state like Mass or any of the tiny ones nearer to Canada. Truly thought at times some ladies who did just that swore their nipples were about to burst from their chests and run away screaming like a loon in heat. If I have yet to say.. I do have an odd sort of humor. Abrasive some may estimate. ~Shrugs~ Which leads to the main reason I used to and probably will lurk about and focus most of my own writing here. Unless something is vital I try not to involve myself in many things. Online life is always a thorn ridden issue because one can not truly emote their intent, or at least do so in a way that can not be misconstrued.

Why:

I do have many thoughts during the day. Some of which confuse myself as to not only their cause, but justifications as equally. Since I only say things aloud that are needed.. Like 'Duck' when I see something swaying towards a persons head or 'Zip it' when someone risks my ire, things tend to get stuck somewhere within the wrinkles of my brain. Writing will allow me to examine those thoughts to some degree.. For just putting them to text manifests them into something that can be not only be prodded upon, but also to mold them into their proper form as they are instead of just bouncing like a wild stallion within its paddock. Plus of course I may think of asking some to be my writing partners one day.. Though I am surmising I may not in the near future until I can get comfortable again. With the changes that have taken place I may not ever want to, or I may be inspired so deeply that I fall back into the habit like an old addict.

Think that all this is a bit muddled, but I am writing without any concerns over paragraph construction, repetition, or any of my old methods. May tinker with it later.. Doubt it. In these pages I feel what is should stay just that. As is.

 

[Hush]

I am expecting a rather sedated day. Never truly works out that way when I plan for it.. Windfalls seldom fall into anyone's waiting lap after all. Though with a bottle of Captain Morgan's white rum? All things may be possible. Which gives ample opportunities to work through some story plot points I wish to work upon. Many purported authors run shy when it comes to ideas but once started tend to freight train their ways through from front cover to back. I on the other hand? No. I am more the reverse. Ideas come in abundance. The issue lies more so in narrowing things into a cohesive level which works for everyone. Honestly.. The backspace key tends to wear out more oft than any other if I don't just merely wipe the slate clean to begin again regardless of prior efforts.

So as for the general plot. One thing most seem to enjoy in modern movies and animation are things combined to make something more powerful. Maybe it is just cool to see something smaller gain purchase over overwhelming odds by linking abilities or armament. Frankly I think it just sates our natural needs of socialization. Humans are after all extremely social creatures. Look what happened when we were placed into isolation with the 'beer bug' as I call it. We used protesting and church's as a valid reason to leave our houses despite having absolutely no true outrage, association, or even religious leanings. Why those things? Just because the rules of the legal norm can be overridden by a larger body of legislation. It may be a twisted review of the facts that allow them to continue despite it being months later, but our culture tends as mature adults tend to allow tantrums to work themselves out. Which added together allows for many story musings.

Assuming all those things were co opted in a less than political aim and more of a fictional setting? We could have a breed brought to life using the base DNA/RNA of a single person + other 'special' people. It could be either both physical/mental or limited to one for more realism. This singular breed could be cut into two separate factions. One being mostly isolationists, the other more chaotic and of course typically more extroverts. One of these two factions could in theory make some sort of technology or have an innate ability to pull the symbiotic nucleic acid (be it D or R) from its host and then deposit it into another of their kind. Which would be reasonable since the tech would need to exist to make them in the first place in some lesser capacity.

However.. If it were more an innate ability another course could be while in a group they could tap into one of the others special 'perks' as it were if needed for a specific situation. So using the supernatural abilities I know of for example one who is overtly strong or have something akin to keen vision could swap out their own talent for one who has some sort of high jumping skill to scale a higher than average wall. Lackluster I know as examples go, but it could be exaggerated to any extent the world builder chose.

If I go off the latter idea that could give rise to a possible protagonist who unwittingly has found he or she has the extremely valuable talent of linking multiple special abilities together into one person for a brief time. That could put them in a position of being hunted more than the usual numbers were/are. For if that could be harnessed by either side, it would certainly lead to them reaching whatever goal it was they wished to obtain.

Not sure if I would add normal types into this story as a possible third faction. That would boost the possible perils immensely in either of the two other plot lines. Our own moralistic beliefs seldom lean towards the gray. Instead we see black and white, wrong or right, good or bad, etc. So if we came across a race of gestalt like beings which would be considered superior in any way our natural inclination would be to eliminate them, or find a way to have their own skills incorporated in a way which was in our own collective interests. Definitely something to consider in the very least. And gestalts are such a perfectly descriptive term.. I would most likely call them that.

Think I'll do a bit of sipping and mull these different ideas over.

 

[Hush]

I have to take a moment or three to express myself.. It would seem this is not quite the place it once was when I looked in upon this chat room. Not only the room template has become like pitch in color, but also the personalities as well. Maybe t was a bit of fan fare on my part but when I was Grey instead I would make it a point to try and include all, including those who had wandered in. Did it bite me in the digital arse? Oh of course. Not all can be met without them sharing some quirks which put off many. But today was such an oddity. People wanting to consider it a neutral conversation when it had to include colors, religions, races, and aye.. Even sexes. And how did anyone expect for it to end? Those who used the buzzwords of course was denouncing those things. So 'white privilege' is now an acceptable term in polite settings? Bah! The color coding at the beginning of it shows an undue leaning towards other colors while denouncing the color in question.. Then we had 'rich white males'. So now we have sex and race thrown in?

Then of course one of the ist's and phobes who wanted to use these terms had the audacity to use the term Straw man argument when they were merely deflecting from their own ism's. Which in and of itself is the essence of Straw man. And as for privilege? That is said on a site you have to prove yourself in by having an internet, a phone or computer, and income in which to waste on each. Every person has privilege. When I lost a limb I could sit there and claim someone who had both were over privileged. Does that make it true? Some expect the world handed to them and any who does not do so is termed as greedy or something more than what they were. Let's say a man works or even a woman or a Muslim or a polka dotted man parrot. They amass a fortune through their own labors. That means in these narrow minded twits eyes they should need give up what they worked for so some street addict of undisclosed variety gets their cut of what hasn't been earned by them? Hah! That almost amused me to the extent of forgoing this little rant.

I care little what sex, color, sexual appetite, any single person has or claims. All that matters is to be treated with as much dignity as they claim they deserve. I tested this theory during all that heated 'polite conversation' by just coming in there and saying "Greetings all". Out of the dozen or so who were either actively speaking, a mod, or casual onlooker only one said hello. If not for the fact that I am not wearing my legs at the moment I would fall out of this chair laughing! And before I read this later and think myself a cad for testing as I did I will remind you sober me, I did write a quick thank you to the person for being a polite human rather than some tantrum ridden child who has to be heard rather than truly listen.

 

[Hush]

Amazing how moods can change with a bit of concentrated effort. Read a few chapters in the newest of the Dresden Files books, did a bit of wood burning in that side project for Svenja, think somewhere after that I napped for a nap, and now at half past 4 in the AM I'm wide awake yet again. Tis something of a constant surprise to me when I sit upon my front porch just staring at the moon. I tend to lose myself in so many thoughts and contemplation's. It's phase is a Waning Gibbous this morn, and though not at full illumination still it finds a way to demand attention from this wandering eye. This is quite welcome really. I find audibles like the cricket's ear puncturing cacophony grating to the extent that the visual stimuli soothes in equal measures to that constant racket.

That being sad I really ought to get started with my day. Digital papers to grade, I really need to go up to the VA and help again with the PT of Charlie, videos to watch and comment on, and I did promise to send M some money to help with her bills. Good lass and a dedicated wife to her down on his luck husband. Still. I can't help but feel bad for her more so of the two. Not because she is a woman, or some misguided notions that she needs my help or even concern. But because she works a 9 to 5, runs her YouTube channel, the Twitch stream, and still takes time to cook and care for him when he is medically disabled. It shows character which not many could show as a claim to fame. Still though.. Our running joke of her being such an ageist does at times agitate me. Again it is fortunate in equal reverse to such an annoyance that she is charming in her own unique way.

Speaking of. I have found it startling on just how many from outside the U.S. I have found common links to. Not that I prefer one to the other, but learning of these different customs, foods, and even outlooks is extremely fascinating. It alongside my own edge of societal leanings gives at times a fresh perspective rather than anchoring me down to pure ignorance. Between she and Svenja, I had and have the opportunity to learn more of what the world sees of my own countries behavior. And more importantly how the decisions here shape so much of the worlds joys and aye, even its woes.

Don't misunderstand me. I have no use for politics in general. Didn't even when I was in the service. It was to me just a job. One in which I did things I am far from proud of now if I take the time for introspection. Which is maybe why I value their friendships as much as I do? Though if anyone dared to listen to some of our conversations they would think us cats and dogs in most ways. Hell's bells I wouldn't blame them either! Some of our more heated debates have resulted in terms like 'Wallowing thunder cunt' or 'Insipid piss waffle' being coined. They rightly think at times I am too on the nose or robotic in my world views. And I refuse to admit or even delve into those arguments for that would put me in subjective rather than objective which is something I am keenly aware I am weakest in. Which of course they well know and love to pick on me over. Mostly due to my first college major being in the outdated mode of Criminal Psych.

Besides politics which in at its heart as dishonest as a $3 dollar bill I also have small use in the arts of conversation in most areas surrounding my life. Could I be more diplomatic or *le gasp* charming? Probably. But that would be disingenuous in most facets of my own life. Think I was built to observe, find issues and problems, solve them as simply as possible, then move on. Convincing people feels like such a waste of resources at times (or the time itself being wasted). Take all these conflicts we have rushing around us like turbulent waves beating down the cliff side. Just like in war times there is only two possible outcomes. Either annihilation or the only other true goal post.. Sitting down and talking. No.. Not like that silly tantrum fest that occurred in the chat room today. They weren't looking to solve things. They were looking to vent. Or more to the point.. Justify their anger while generally lashing out. No use can be found in instigation's or veiled insults hiding behind the mask of 'civil conversations'. Again I say BAH to such false terms. It is more akin to the term shown on large news networks like 'peaceful arson' than anything remotely civil.

The speaking I refer to is quite simple and quite hard. Air your complaints. Break them down to the simplest points.. Then find common grounds from there. Issue there is forgoing Ego where lies ideals such as 'I am right and refuse to hear you or anyone else'. Those sorts of fallacies led to the destruction of the Twin Towers and oh so many lives. Don't think like me? You should die. Don't believe in what I do? Then you should die. Not I, but my people have been subjugated.. So give me things or I destroy. Group A has it rough. Aye I know others have too but they don't matter only my group A does. Pure ego which leads to outrage which leads to harm for most everyone in one way or the other. All this I care less than a fig leaf cares for a mote of sand in the air. My God is better than your God. Good for you. That's your lifestyle. I don't care if you believe in Allah, Buddha, Jesus, or Larry, Moe, and Curly. It is nice to feel that we become more than dirt and stuff that makes the cosmos when we pass on. Feel that a group is being held down more so than EVERYONE else? Seriously? I could on a whim point out any number of people who have harder lives. And aye. I say people in the form of groups, or even whole cultures not just some random passers by. Don't believe me? Let's start with one simple one I can rattle off from the top of my head. There is an actual Death Camp in China reserved for a sect of Muslims. Some may be too young to remember and since our educational system is lackluster in some countries I will put it bluntly. It is a place where they kill you because of a color or belief or just because of who your parents are. And they kill those families as well. And your neighbors, or at times people who have associated with you. Kind of overshadows the whole I have a sucktastic job and it is because of my color/age/sex I don't get more that I deserve.

These sorts of things need to be addressed without Ego, without rewards expected. Baseline.. Humanity. That is what matters. Everyone should in these talks be given a modicum of respect and understanding. But let us again be blunt. Those things start at a value and decrease or increase depending on your actions alongside your words. Try to reach a goal of understanding (be it giving or receiving) you gain. Sarcasm or instigation? Lose some. Start small. These things are logical and simple. Though honestly? Most are incapable of such a feat without force to make them do so. Because that listening thing and absorbing information rather than repelling for the sake of Ego? That is greater than trying to see each other as people. Plain simple people.

Then again.. What do I know?

 

[Hush]

At this point in the day I tend to take some time for myself. Mostly just to recoup from helping with PT though I loathe admitting it. Today though was quite light. Only one patient was deemed safe for me to work with and he merely needed to learn the basics on how to get around without sight. Thanks to HIPAA I have to give broad strokes. Poor person had surgery to contend with retinopathy but due to complications has lost the vast majority of his sight over the past two weeks. Using the guard rail around the box structure I led him to to specific things and let him try to identify objects by touch alone. Of course this brought about stern looks by the superiors there. They want the patients to be bound to their rooms like some sort of prisoners. Luckily they had little cause to raise a skunk sized stink. Had him wear his mask and once back to his room made sure he washed his hands numerous times. And we took things one literal step at a time so they could not claim that our work interfered with their milling about giving meds. He caught on fairly quickly and since I afforded him the respect he was due there was quite a bit of progress made. Even allowed him the last six feet to his room without playing guide dog. Along the way we spoke of his personal life before this travesty that so altered his life so drastically. Full and supportive family. Not only a wife but some children and hopefully some grand kids one day. Sadly of course he isn't allowed to have them visit due to the beer bug, but they do call most every day. Was there any undertones of pessimism? Of course. Anyone who plays Pollyanna with me causes a slight eye twitch when it comes to doubt. That being said, compared to me when I had my own surgeries? He is sunshine while I was a meandering shadow.

Have already sent M that money. Doubt they too celebrate Labor day where she is. And why would they? ~Chuckles~ Being a transplant from Lithuania to England she has more than enough culture shock. Just hope she can use the money to get to the store before they disallow anyone else from shopping there today. Feels at times it is more akin to a bread line rather than going out for mere essentials when we speak. On the reverse side of that negativity at least the job isn't too physically taxing. At least I would assume coding isn't causing her to breathe heavily? Though she is extremely slight of weight and stature so that could just be a possibility. So if I were to guess her schedule for today.. Get off work, go straight to the corner Mart, get cheaper foods such as liver, gherkins, and the like, head home, begin cooking as she works up her next YouTube video.. Most likely concerning the serious influx of micro-transactions or something dealing with the retraction of the in game ads from that UFC game if I can hazard a guess. Eat her meal and make sure her husband does as well. Settle in with her Twitch stream, do so up until bed time.. Rinse and repeat. Either way I did my part and won't be needed until time to comment on the video itself.

I *could* grade those papers. Not due to post their results until Wednesday. Slightly boring since the test they had to take could easily be managed with a Google search to obtain their answers. Plus the questions themselves are merely refreshers so no need for originality or even really attempting to activate those brain cells. So instead I think will work for fun on that over bloated F-list design. Won't bother with any Favs or No's. Besides experienced writers, long term plays, hetro plays, and the genres I dabble in? I think the rest should be somewhat sense and nonsense in equal measure. Doing that and maybe listening to a comedy like Tim Minchin's musical lunacy should burn up a couple of hours.

After that I only have Svenja's box to work on. I've finished the lid and some of the side designs. Still need to finish the inscription and the other swans I intend to use as space fillers. Then there is the glitter, spray, felt, mirror insertion, yadda yadda. This time though I intend fully to use what common sense I have left to hold back until the high heat of the day is over with before beginning. A wood burning tool is more or less a soldering iron with a absurdly short cord. It will heat my in house workshop by roughly seven to ten degrees. Tack that to the semi comfortable eighty degrees and I may become more like Frosty in a sauna than I think I would like. Might be able to put a small insert of the top and front on here for future reference. Just in case I get the urge to make something else for her or someone else before New Years.

 

[Hush]

This is a nice moment for a relaxed thought or three. 9/11 was quite a day many moons ago. Towers falling, people losing their lives to senseless violence. Then there is now. Worlds in turmoil due to a sickness, media refuses to cover so many important details, both movie and video platforms putting out material that just a few years back wouldn't have seen the light of day, so on and so forth. Makes a persons eye twitch and the chewing of ones own cheek wouldn't be seen as surprising to anyone honestly.

Spending quite a bit of time on You Tube as not only a supporter of others content, but also a content creator creator myself.. I see some odd things many days. Yesterday for example. The debacle over this new Netflix movie Cuties bringing even gaming content creators out to rail against it. Personally I already cut my own subscriptions to them due to this, but it was a long time coming for this individual. More and more shows pushing agendas rather than entertainment in general. It is like buying an ice cream cone and opting to wear it as a hat rather than eating it outright. Sure you can do it.. But why would you? Not sure where we lost what the definition of things were and instead creating a reality where something is not what it was intended for, but rather something else entirely.. Here we are though. Living in a side show mirror.

~Ahem~ Back to topic. M posted her take on the movie. She had actually taken the time to watch it which did surprise me. In her 40 min review she stated around 80% of the movie steered clear of the objectification of adolescent children. The rest though.. Another story all together. So I posted in comments. Think I used more F bombs than I had ever used in a singe comment block. Did make it clear that I could not find an objective bone in my body, and I did apologize in advance to her and the community. She was nice enough to allow me to leave it up. After all the comments section does not cut from her monetization so long as she curbs her own verbiage and the like. This wasn't the issue though. What was, (for me at least) was some putz who tried to coincide the Manga and anime censorship to Western interference. I've yet to lock horns with this person.. No sense in worrying if it be female or male, that doesn't lend any support or negation to their claims after all. But if I do.. I would love to hear their cogent argument in the pro corner of the over sexualisation of a child under even the age of 12. Why such a tender age? Because of all countries I have heard of, this is the lowest I know of that allows that age of consent. Do I approve? Hell no! Just a baseline fact though. Think 11 is it and it is in Nigeria I believe? This movie is French made, won some sort of Sundance award, is shown in the US and around the majority of the world.. None of which makes it okay to me.

In this so called 'movie' the child isn't even 12. Isn't a drawn or made up entity but a living, breathing 'actress'. IMDB lists its rating as a MA movie. Netflix has lost over 4% in the market just since the movies release due to the backlash.. So far I believe the moral outrage seems as real as the sun rising in the morning. Then what is the rationalization this person could possibly be working from? Is this really a case like Uzaki-chan? Think I will have to mull this over for a bit before saying more.

 

[Hush]

After a few long debates and conversations I feel confident that my previous assumptions and facts were more objective than first though. Some are demanding he DOJ investigate Netflix itself due to the content. Mind you I have little faith in their handling of any case considering their track record. But still it is heartening to know I am not in the minority.. Though would that stop me? Not for a minute. Odder still was in private M asked me to look into this silly Disney debacle when it came to Mulan. Didn't need to really. Having a Jewish mother and a father who was once a Catholic priest I was already aware of the now present concentration camps in the Northern part of China. It is Muslims of a sort who are being segregated, herded really.. Due to their faith they can typically only get any sort of medical procedures IF it is organs, blood, etc of their own faith. So the government is collecting those things along with hair and the like from the people there to basically sale to those who can afford it.

So why did Disney do the deal? Money of course. No one needs have a degree in Journalism to figure that one out. They try to make China happy because despite the world being in such a mess, China will give them the green they need to stay afloat. Ironic though since Walt himself was an avid and quite public figure when it came to his hatred of Communism. Again.. I care nothing for politics. It is just a corrupt system in most aspects of any culture. Sure the ideas of each are grandiose, but those who implement those principals are the issue. Focusing on wordplay and manipulations to get what they desire. All while the majority under whatever flag they raise have to pay the prices. So that crud can jump out a window. However.. My focus is on the people who become downtrodden due to all these sorts of things. Not because I have any fondness for the majority or even the minority, but because it makes no long term sense to do these things. Sure, the Chinese can offer a quick fix if you are strapped for cash, but if you damage the image that is decades long by taking their handouts? You kill your value long term. If narrowed to a field most would understand. You give a certain amount of trust to others the minute you go outside your yard. That sliver of decency we expect from our fellow humans can be bruised if not completely broken by the smallest of actions. A lie, a behavior of superiority, even something as small as verbal backstabbing in jest can damage that fragile trust. So siding with a group who not only oppress and kill single individuals, but large groups and then go as far as to sale the remains for monetary gains? No. Disney put its own foot in that bear trap.

Not much I could add to my own channel or comments in any other that could express it more clearly. Though I must admit that when I see the op culture channels reach out and broach these subjects I inwardly give applauds. Yes the media and entertainment industry needs an overhaul when it comes to what they do and say. But when a dedicated entertainment channel decides to become involved you know things have reached a breaking point. For the moment though I think I will leave the heavy lifting to them while I focus on some lighter issues. Until of course I see something that catches my eye that the masses have not spoke on.

 

[Hush]

Got an interesting request today in my mail through Tube. Seems Drinker and a few others are thinking of a round table discussion over some of the before mentioned issues and a few others and may want me to participate as well. Not something I relish mind you. Truly don't want to become a cause of concern for monetization for any of the others involved, and I certainly won't cross any lines with my own views on morality. Would be nice though to speak with some of them regardless on which parts get edited in. Many of those he mentioned may be involved are quite well known creators, and of them I know of only a few that I have spoken to. Didn't get the specifics past the who, what, and when though. Plus the time zone differences would mean that some of them would not be all that fresh in the day as compared to others. Especially by that 6 hour difference.

Regardless I have a few days to consider the offer and it is kind. But I do have so much already on my plate and of course my usual concerns on privacy I may have to side step it. On a lighter note M was selected as one of the finalists in that Sims competition. She seems quite proud and a bit of an Ego boost may just do her some good channel wise. She has seemed quite down due to the attitudes she has had to face in the comments of her videos of late and though I like to help her? I am no white knight by any stretch of the imagination. If I jump in every time she says something off to her viewers she will never learn how to let those comments fall from her back like water off a ducks back. Plus of course if they want to debate, they can always jump in and do so in the comments I make on my own. Wouldn't be the first or last time that has happened. Only drawback is it being on the net. Which most fall back on because they want a one sided debate.. I.E. Somewhere they can express their views and if anyone takes issue with it they can just be blocked.

Also I took a few moments to review this sites own modified rules. Interesting honestly. I see some rules which are open to interpretation, not unlike platforms like Facebook. In it one person can take issue and strike a person or post down while another would see no issues with it. Quite a confusing ball of wax really. That could lead to favoritism to be implemented as well. Where someone who has been a member longer gets away with an infraction that a newer member could be wiped from the face of existence. I have in the past seen it here, and in other forums. So I will just consider this a visitor station where you abide by their rules publicly while wondering on the specifics to yourself. Though I will point to the top paragraph of my own post. I did give warning in abundance that these are my own thoughts and feelings on anything I speak on and if any may take offense easily, I would suggest they go away.

Something happened yesterday that put a bad taste in my mouth. Went for a 'walk' for my daily exercise once I returned home. It is a daily task I usually do at night because in my condition I do not prefer folks seeing, no less bothering me as I move from point A to B. I typically take a break at a church around half a mile or so away to catch my breath and relax my arms before moving on. Seems I made a mistake in thinking anyone would be welcome to take a breather at a church. Or maybe because I did so while there were people there? Either way as I sat there in the parking lot one of their parishioners called the police! When he first pulled into the parking lot I took little notice. I have no love for the local authorities. Seen with my own eyes how they act when on duty. And it is far from neutral in the vast majority of instances. It was only when he explained to me that the called because people had once harassed some of the folks inside that I had to laugh. I am wheel chair bound without my legs. If they felt afraid of me all they need do is step up on a damned sidewalk and I could not physically do anything to them! So the idea that I could or even would do them harm was a bit of a joke. Still though I left. Thought about calling today and trying to get a hold of their head pastor or priest or whatever he/she is and asking how is it they can be tax exempt or no less call themselves a place of worship when so much mistrust and apathy exists within their congregation?

What made this even more a travesty was when I returned home. I hadn't even made it completely on my own front porch when the self same police man came pulling into my driveway. Luckily I had a neighbor already there waiting for me as a witness. You see this is a normal daily occurrence when it comes to my next door neighbors. Not because of my disability or my charming nature. Neither exist in their eyes in all frankness. It is no brag when I say with my own upper body I am stronger than I look to most, and so with that I hardly ever seem to be in need. At least this is so once someone takes the time to get to know me. Of course that hardly happens in the world we live in. But back on topic! Mr Cop man decided to try and question me once he got out of his car and moved to my porch without my permission mind you. Asking for my SS number and name, etc. Didn't mind giving it for I am not a shy person. Just awkward because of my bluntness. Then he asked if I was registered.. As if I am some mongrel that NEEDS to be leashed! Of course this triggered my natural smart arse comment center of this muddled mess of a brain. I answered that though I did not understand the nature of the question I do pay my rent at my abode and even better I have had my rabies shots and if he wants I could get my collar and tags. He didn't find the humor in my sarcasm. Made it clear that if the folks a that church wanted to press charges for trespassing he would be back. Which of course made me almost fall out my chair laughing as did the humor of it all strike my neighbor as well! I am well acquainted with legalities and his statement had so many holes in it that frankly I could not help myself. So once I could breathe again I kindly smiled at him and made it abundantly clear that I think it be for the best if he did so off my rented property and most likely out of my sight. Utter nonsense he was spouting to try and intimidate me. Even if I were to be taken to jail or some such rot like that, I would easily get out and oh how the lawsuits would come. But no. I truly didn't care for much in the way of company after that irritation occurred so I spoke briefly to my neighbor as to what happened that sparked all this and after he balked at the nerve he went quietly home.

Sadly though it seems the Copper couldn't get anyone to sign or fill out any sort of paperwork against me. Almost surprising since unlike these supposed minorities we that are considered disabled seem to be the biggest eyesore to the masses in general. Seriously.. Think how most react when they see someone with no legs, or no eyesight, or someone who can't help themselves due to some mental issue. They garner more stares than any photo negative of their own pigmentation. Oh they KNOW we exist. They just want us unseen so they do not have to think on such things. Of course there are some who fawn over us as if we are infants needing a change. Sometimes it is a religious thing that prompts them or a civic nicety, but even then you can see it in their nervous laughter as you politely refuse their help.. They think you have a severe case of the cooties. Which makes me in turn laugh all the harder with my own antics. Especially when I come across a social justice warrior who wants to tell me what the newest 'greatest type of person in the world' is. Not sure half the time if I want to give them a cookie for their efforts, or put them in a corner to think over their childish ramblings.

But enough on all this for a few hours at least. I have to get to work soon. Wonder what sorts of folks I will get the pleasure of acquainting myself with today? Or more to the point.. What sorts of Hades I will have to make them endure so they can return to their new/old lives.

 

[Hush]

Whirlwind days the past couple of weeks. Many high and low points involved. One of which was what seems to have taken days, though was only a twenty four hour straight debate between 4 You Tubers including myself. Funniest part for me at least was just how much I have already forgotten due to sheer exhaustion during the event! Can't say I was completely impartial or even logical once I hit near the 16 hour marker. Didn't help that I had agreed to take a few drinks during the event. My idea of a 'few drinks' and their own were obviously quite different. They had maybe a six pack of beer or a couple of mixed affairs while I decided to see if there was any hidden writings at the bottom of my fresh bottle of Capt. Morgan clear. Upon playback and after a couple days of dull aches and mindless slumber I found myself wondering who it was with my own voice and inflections calling one of the other debaters a 'Thundering Cunt Walleyed Pisswaffle'. What that is I have no clue, but I can honestly pull an Ollie North and claim I have no recollections of those events.

The topic was Subjective vs Objective in regards to Media and Pop Culture. I of course chose the objective side of the argument for without that there can be no subjective. First ten hours or so it was extremely civil. Only real contention was what exactly should be the definition of the two terms in regards to media and pop culture themselves. One deemed it as facts vs feelings which is a bit generalized I thought. I chose not to give my thoughts on it short of abiding by what the mass decided for none of those small sections mattered so much in my eyes than the actual crux of the debate itself. Then again I do tend to respond rather than initiate conflicts. Find it far easier in all honesty to focus that way. Do remember that there was a two hour argument somewhere in the center of the debate where a couple of this crew just kept repeating the same things over an over without giving way to any logical points the others were trying to interject. Might be the point that my patience was most tested and my Irish blood came out in those insane ramblings. Seems to have worked to break the tensions for they spent another ten minutes just catching their collective breaths from laughter rather than devolving further into 'No YOU listen' back and forth sort of bits.

Luckily I think the owner of the account wont be able to upload the vast majority of out little chat. You Tube has some odd rules. One of which is over the age range of the content we propose to put out there for general consumption. I think it safe to say that we put enough into it that would be considered shall we say.. Condescending at best and offensive to at least one group or another at worst, that it would be in their best interest to never let the world hear the insanity that ensued. Besides... The copyright claims that would pop up with music we played in the backgrounds and other issues may just make it less than marketable.

As for the low points of the past weeks. We lost one patient the other day in the real world. Not sure of all the details but he did seem to be what I may consider a good person. Two sessions with him gave me only broad strokes but he had no real family that he spoke of, and yet was quite social minded about the world in general. Seemed almost laser focused on getting better. Possibly to the point of obsession. Loved the idea of finding ways of incorporating exercise into even the most hum drum of daily tasks. Positive and yet not Pollyanna in realism. Does kind of make me appreciate some of the distancing nurses and their counterparts opt to take when dealing with their charges. At times I honestly should take the same jaded views. Just.. No.. Can't do it. Not sure as to why. Could be due to the points I laid bare in the past of being in their shoes as the patient. Might also be the fact that emotionally I tend to appear distant even if I do care.

In truth I could flip the ole mental switch and take the life of someone if the need arose yet again. Thing is I feel so apathetic to the mere thought of it though I pray it never occurs again. I've fought violent tendencies through many of my later formative years.. Many of which came from my own less than stellar father. So easy the excuse could cross my lips that I was abused so I should be allowed to abuse others through learned experiences. Which is something I was reminded of recently. On my birthday in fact. Sibling offered to treat me and our mother to a meal. During which she decided to remind me of something I had long forgotten. An instance after our mother had left the abusive ass where he tried to abduct my sister while she was in my care. She gushed at how caring a brother I was while the truth was far less heroic. It wasn't so much he was trying to take her. It honestly was a case of him trying to take her from me that drew my ire. Really sounds horrible now I know. But at that point in our childhood I hardly knew her as more than an infrequent irritant. He however had damaged more than my body alone, but had tried to beat the spirit from its shell to make himself feel better about himself. All that pain, all that denial of my own humanity, the attempts to diminish my self worth, all of it.. And at that moment I had snapped off the fear of harm in favor of howling at the moon sized threat that tried to take yet something else away from me. And yes. He did attack me. With a chain no less that he had in his trunk. And yes. He did hurt me when it hit my flesh, but instead of recoiling as I had when able in my younger years? I rolled into the pain and allowed it to wash over me. It felt something like a blush from my cheeks at that point that worked its way down my body until the whole of my being seemed to be aflame. Most glorious part of it all back then now that I think more deeply upon it? I caused him to bleed in response to his own attacks.

Which led to me being more and more aggressive in regards to others. It was as if I could cause harm to a stone and make it wince so suddenly I was better than I truly was. Luckily I caught myself before I could rationalize going down that road further than need be.. But so many years the temptation was there. Along with the pent up rage. Don't get me wrong. I did plenty of stupid things in regards to anger. But I refused to direct it towards anything living until I was in the service. At that time anything that threatened me or my own though? Well they earned it didn't they? Wasn't until I had gotten back to what is now reality and spent some time sorting myself to see just how broad ramifications could be due to that negativity. Apathy is far safer than actual anger. Especially anger that could change the visuals of turning some idiot into a two legged PEZ dispenser into something that once could breathe and no longer has the need to. Which is PRECISELY why the switch stays in the off position. If I needed to release that sort of energy I may as well direct it into things like I used to when a vent could make the difference. Overworking to make a profit or if needed, sex.

Though the latter would be more a pipedream unless I made some serious modifications. Wearing those prosthetic legs are so draining. After all they are just glorified stilts. Not to mention I already broke the last pair and insurance really frowns on replacing them. So much frowning TBH that they refused to give me another pair with working 'knees' (not that I blame them considering I managed to break what they thought were unbreakable). Though isn't that just the way things go. One in a million chance turns into a solid 50/50 in my case most days.

 

[Hush]

Was looking through a few request threads for fun when a sliver of inspiration struck me. Hardly a full fledged idea by any stretch of the imagination. But I need a break from writing my other works so this disjointed jumble needs to break free from its housing.

From the shadows of the pool
Black as midnight, think as gruel
Come my nymphs and ye shall be
Silent images brought forth from me​

Those were the first recorded words that described the thing which exists on the thinnest membrane just outside our reality. Before that it existed as paintings or more truthfully in the hind minds of our first upright walkers. They found those smallest ruptures between the here and there and of course animal curiosity all but forced them to use what senses they possessed to examine the ichor like substance. To them it looked like pitch or tar. It smelled both sour and sweet. When prodded with a stick or stone it made an almost sloppy wet sound. Then there was the choice to make physical contact with it. This fluid like ooze gave them a flush and oily feeling at equal levels. Didn't seem to roll off the skin, but instead held its shape. To creatures with such basic drives this seemed like a miracle! They had yet to find animal hides or other creature comforts for warmth, and the harshness of their colder surroundings led them to decide that if they used this goo on their bare skin, they would find comfort.

Such simplistic minds they were. More need than thought, less a chance for fight and instead chose flight. Little desire and more necessity. So for them there was no real side effects to contact with this otherworldly being. Well short of one. With each passing hour, and then day of physical closeness between them.. These Neanderthals began to show signs of their first negative emotion. Greed. There was only a finite amount of this gloopy pleasure, and there were so many of them clustered together. Grunting led to howls of protest when one saw another go back for a second application. This like a domino led to anger. To this day the being does not understand if it was the rush of adrenaline, or possibly it was the increase in blood pressure, for all it matters it could be due to aura change. No matter what it reacted! Seeped into pores, this thing triggered the illicit response of joy (dopamine and serotonin) when met with such a ferocious negative response. Was it trying to causes the violence that ensued or was it just releasing those neurotransmitters to counter this oncoming bloodbath? Doesn't matter really. The effect from cause left few still standing. Mostly thanks to the fact that so many had yet to allow this substance into their lives.

Could that have been the preamble of Abel and Caine? The possibility does have merit. But those days led to other instances where the mind of men led to more logic. You see others had throughout time found this mire like stuff. Some to greater places in history, others gone in the whimpers and whispers of eternity. For as the mayflies that call themselves humanity evolved, so did this organism. Myths were laid around it. Hypnos, Morpheus, the Alp, Sayaa, Oily Man, and so many others.. The only common theme was no matter what or where it was found the results seemed to intensify during slumber. Plain enough we had advanced, and as we began to think larger thoughts our minds had grown reckless in the possibilities. Conqueror's and their desire to take more, Kings/Queens and the urges to take hold of larger groups. Shaping them into whatever their ruler desired for their futures. All the way down to beggars and urchins who wanted more than they could handle so long as it was their own. No matter the pocket size or political power each were just human, and thus wanted something other than what they solely could muster.

Another thing all those had in common was a basic need. Something all animals share in necessity and yet not the same as us. Sleep. A place where the frontal cortex relaxes and allows that primal brain to flourish. This is where that primordial ooze plumes best. You see as we developed it did as well. Not quite a complete creature, it did have something as it grew over the millennia. A type of hive memory. When one ounce met up with another it shared the experiences. Learning in its own unique way what drove us and more to the point.. What it drew substance from when it came to its hosts. In our slumber we gave way to such dark thoughts that our rational minds balked at. These were its bread and butter.

It had learned through trial and error (Lost Colonies for example) how to influence us in those times of REM. Causing all sorts of maladies like avarice, paranoia, schizophrenia, and oft times a fracture of personalities within a individual. All while we slumber! This is not to say that these could only be the work of something we would term as evil.. But if it is within us naturally, who is to say it could not also add as a contributing force to cause such occurrences?

Even now as I sit here I know this thing is real. How so you may rightly ask? For I have come into contact with it. How is not important. Suffice to say that it will soon take me.. So I must stay alert and awake for as long as my body permits. I must put to pen this warning. I am not mad! It tries to trick me. Tries to make my sleeping moments seem reality. When I try to resist it causes what some would call sleep paralysis in the littered moments of its amusement. When it does truly become enrages it steals my very breath. When I dare become mentally listless I find my arms moving of their own accordance. Giddy am I when at times I see a fork and the soft whispers in the back of my mind try to convince me it is wise to try and plunge it in my eye. All the while it beckons me to go back to the pooling bog and douse myself in its embrace.

When last I slept it shared with me some of its history. How man tried to use it so in return it uses man in something I can only describe as a driving need or vengeance. People our own tales call witches or magicians working to devise ways in which to enslave it to meet their own needs, only to find the reverse happening without even knowing it occurs. Truthfully I think it a curse much akin to the monkeys paw. Giving wonders only to pervert them to in the long term hurt the one asking its boon.

My lids grow heavy even now. I must put this journal away somewhere in the hopes that someone finds it one day soon after I am gone. I no longer trust myself with simple lock and key to protect it. For the malevolence knows what I attempt to do. It slips into my mind and can read me as simply as we take in written medium. Each thought seems stifled now. Much like trying to wring a damp towelette for its final drops of moisture.

I can resist no longer. I find I must leave my home and these warnings. Again please do not think me mad. I shall go to its home and do as it says knowing full well I shall not return. This is my final act to preserve these words. I beseech whomever reads this.. Guard your dreams as if your life depends on it. Give not unto temptation.

<Here below the dates show these entries all flowed over a span of three months. Each entry a bit more rushed in style after the first 20 odd days.>

 

[Hush]

Something bad must be bound to happen. Has to be the case with all the good that has dropped in my lap this day. Some of the other channels and I have a deal where we swap merch out. Nothing major mind you. A pin from CFTV or a beanie from Gary in exchange for my own stuff from Crowdmade and other avenues when available. Today was either a planned bombardment on their part, Amazon decided to hold all my packages until I needed a spare wheelchair to carry them all, or just one of those if it can happen it will sort of windfalls. Not to mention I had a confirmation letter from B&N that my copy of Peace Talks is on its way, AND I found I won an autographed copy of Battle Grounds from Butcher himself! That of course is something of an extremely pleasant surprise since last I checked almost all his penned works tend to go for well in the hundred dollar range. Not that I intend to sell it. I am not so much a collector if I enjoy a series as I am a devourer. And considering that bearded bastard took years to get these books finished? I may have to pace myself lest I lose sleep consuming them both. In fact of all the authors I have ever frequented I think only he and maybe King ever managed to put out 2 full sized novels out in less than three months time. So in this I am completely floored over.

Though I am sure some may think things like that less than stellar, or even look down on me more so that I have such a love of actual physical media vs the speed one can get when it comes to that digital claptrap. I know most of my own colleagues feel that way. Even the Prof who I grade for has went upgrade happy when digesting anything current. I really do understand the appeal. If it comes to gaming I prefer Steam to CD on my P.C. I like ordering movies rather than going to the cinema. Though that is partially due to the setups of the theaters themselves. Handicap is either back or front row and I prefer mid range. Plus the advantage of eating a steak and potatoes vs popcorn and Sour patch kids at nearly the same cost? Aye. I will stick to home purchases for things like that. But books? No.. No.. NO! The feel of the pages and the scent of a good well worn page? That just satisfies something inside me down deep. Maybe after I enjoy a book from cover to cover three or four times I may listen to one of the audio titles just to hear wat sort of inflections the voice artist has compared to what my own imagination can muster. But I would never sully my already dirt filled mind with voice before turning the page.

Speaking of voice I had better hurry. Promised to moderate a live stream which means eyes need to be on the chat rather than fixating on spelling and all the squat and bother my mind wanders through when I sort myself in journals. May add more later though depending on how this livestream is. Have no idea on the topic.. So long as it isn't a doom and gloom who know?

 

[Hush]

That was not the best of pop culture news to hear today. I had heard inklings of this yesterday, but the sheer scope of it was more than I expected once I got the actual details. Disney kicking over 28k cast and crew to the curb. You'd think after Star Wars fiascos, Mulan remakes being filmed near a current concentration camp, mass violations being posted daily of them not cleaning rails and rides during the pandemic, the kerfuffle over certain actors claiming abuse due to color. etc.. They'd try to avoid doing a mass exodus of employees. Nope! They want to keep the higher ups salaries going despite putting even more people in dire straits. Swear between the sickness, the riots, and all the other things we have seen the human spirit endure this year we'd hope that some entertainment would be just the tickle our bodies needed to make it to tomorrow. I know. This doesn't have any actual bearing on my world specifically. But there in lies the rub. World around us cares not for the most part if yet another light dims or worse still flickers until gone. We only see the terra firma beneath our own feet.

It is one reason I carry two jobs. One for survival since I refuse federal help, the other to help support those I find in need. M for one. She tries so hard and gets so little. Sure she is a complete pain in the arse when it comes to her Lithuanian pride. But as she has learned. Her ego doesn't put food in her belly, nor does it help her husband who can not work due to his injuries. So though reluctant and even hostile when I help I know she appreciates it. In fact with the last bit of cash I sent her I think she ordered some new clothes. Something which she has had to do without for nearly two years. Wasn't all that much truly. About the cost of a triple A game in our market here in the US. Only bite in the back side is the conversion rate kills around 20%. So a Franklin only balances out to $80. And no. I know some would think I am simping or some ridiculous term they have invented when it comes to helping the opposite sex. Truth is despite never meeting face to face (nor do I have ANY desire to) I consider her a friend. She has been trying her hand at You Tube for over 10 years now. That shows determination and frankly any who can't respect that can spread their cheeks then do a dryer spin on a thorny cactus.

Sure there are other channels I run Patreon for. Even thought for nostalgias sake I may even work out something for this site. Have yet to decide that one though. First impressions on the changes makes me waver more than any interpersonal contact with those who frequent this site in general. Most of these I have spoken to or messaged are a bit stuffy or completely nonplussed. But when I was that age I think I was about as bad, hells bells I may have been worse! Oh well. I know there is at least one person here that has some grace and isn't above showing it. And sometimes one is more than enough.

So today had some ups and some downs didn't it? Feels nice to decompress without having to speak any words. I've come to that point in my life I can still multitask thoughts but I still stifle my communications. Mostly because if I did speak it may embarrass someone. Not me personally mind you. I am the man who when nurses tried to insist on showering my hairy ass I not only refused, but did a handstand in that PVC shower chair while singing 'I'm a little teapot'. Did I care that I had three grown women staring at my dangling cock as I swayed forward and back on my hands? Not only can I say no, but I found it hilarious that I had them all blushing. Only thing that could possibly put some crimson on my own cheeks is when someone compliments me. Though with the beard I keep luckily no one would see it.

Speaking of crimson. Tomorrow is my weekly gym visit. One would think bench presses would be a simple task. Try doing it with no leg support to brace off of! Each time I get half way up that bar the strain to my shoulders has my very bones screaming. But I made a bet and I will be damned if I will let those pulling for me down. My current weight is around the 160 to 180 marker and I am lifting 200. Tomorrow I go for 225. If I can pull that off I just may go for broke and slap on that extra quarter. Wont be worth a damn for a few days after that though.

Luckily I do not have anything more pressing than grading a few papers over the weekend and maybe working on that commission work through Etsy. Hate working with staining though. Still it's a hefty sum for such little effort so the stink and subsequent headache more than averages things out. Oh and have to record the voice work on that video, but that is something I can do while allowing the wood to breathe. Sounds like a boat load though truly isn't. It'll just feel like it.

 

[Hush]

Pushed a bit more so far today than I ought to have. Feels like I tried to force my rotator cuff through the rough side of a cinder block. Bah! Pain is a temporary thing in most aspects so no reason to be a weepy cockhead over it. Looking through my E Mails I found something odd.. Well odder than the usual barrage of get rich schemes and other Malarkey. Someone wrote to my channel and asked what it takes to be a You Tuber. Mind you they weren't as elegant as all that, but that's the general gist of it. Typically I am concise and quite blunt personality wise. Depending on dry humor and snarky comments only in character. So I have to debate on which way or even if I will respond.

Most likely with an honest retort. In fact many seem to think it is just a matter of record, upload, make money. Stars and stones if only it were that simple! The best ones already have a script set up along with some sort of hook. And that is AFTER you go through the whole 'What sort of channel are you trying to produce' jargon that You Tube wants to categorize you under. Don't get me wrong. There are many like P that run gaming channels. In those you still have to do a rump roast more than just record and play. After you set up the parameters of your channel you normally want to work on the background of your shoot. Greenscreens, lighting, camera setup, making sure nothing CS (channel strike) worthy is in the background, run a mike check, blah blah..

There is the script/no script option once you sit down. Many of the bigger names do this as I mentioned. Even if it is a list of bullet points most still want to make a limit list to make sure they say nothing that could get them demonetized. Up until recently for example we weren't even allowed to say the words Corona Virus on screen. Frickin algorithm would catch you in less than a second on that one. So if you were just damned and determined to talk about current events you needed to be creative. Beer Bug was an option, as was the sickness that shall not be named (Harry Potter is such a staple that worked with most households), or any other unique mix that gets the point across.

Then you start to record. Surprisingly this one flubs most people up the hardest. We try to make it seem natural, but try talking normally to your computer. If it carries on a conversation back please seek some help. You are in essence talking to yourself. But you can not do it as if in a conversation. Need to look relaxed and get your words across.. All while calmly staring at a camera and gently plying your hook in there. You want to get that point across in the most engaging way possible. Got to keep in mind though what not to say as much as what to say.

Now let's say you breeze through all that so far. Keep in mind his is the broadest of explanations. I try not to overburden a person with minuet details on some of the in-betweens unless it is somethin akin to online roleplay. Then comes the editing. And ohh yes there WILL be editing. That pesky algorithm and analytics tends to favor videos that are between 10-20 minutes in length. Anything less or more and your video will be less than top ten in the keyword search. Keep that in mind as you watch yourself multiple times saying the same things to a camera while cheesing it up. They (You Tube that is) know that an average person at best can only be engaged in a topic for those 10+ minutes. Anything more and they begin to lose either interest or focus. Which is understandable. Those just hitting their adulthood now hardly listen to basic instructions, no less keep their attention solely focused on one thing. Which is one reason we call it a hook. Get it in your catch and you just don't yank them in. You tease them just as you would a lover when you find that G spot.

Which then leads back around to censoring yourself. They have programs that try and catch you saying anything You Tube finds.. Shall we say unmarketable? Hard to stay relevant if you can't speak on current events, or make even the slightest hint of lewdness, or talk about certain groups in general, or politics, or even comparing apples to oranges in most conversations. One can keep sex and profanity out entirely but still someone will inevitably get offended and try to manually strike your channel. All these things can get you in hot water if you ever intend to monetize the channel itself and there are scores of pitfalls in the interim. Three strikes and your channel is gone. Put out the wrong message and the video is gone. Same if you have anything in the video that is either copy right protected or can be considered the intellectual property of another person. And the list of don't and can't grows from a hand full of dirt to a mountain in no time.

So now you would think. Made video, looks perfect, now just upload? Nope. Now to look for thumbnail, title (gods forbid you clickbait someone), and setting up all the legal jargon in the description. Then you can attempt the upload. Sometimes You Tube is being slow or even times out at the worst moments possible. Makes dial up seem fast as it converts what amounts to less time than it takes to make a pot of spaghetti into something that can take up to an hour to maybe even multiples of that. At times I think a turtle dipped in honey from its legs down could make it up the side of Kilimanjaro before a single upload completes.

This complete it is now time to wait. Sometimes a day or two in fact just to see if anyone makes any claims on the video itself. But now you can't stop there. Want to get higher than 10 on that keyword search so you may want to repeat this process daily. In fact you all but need to. You have no sponsors and your definitely not partnered so if you want to get any gains money wise you got to churn that butter baby. Views under 2 minutes do not count towards anything as the system doesn't recognize it, Likes and dislikes matter not. It is publicity after all and that You Tube just loves. Then there is monitoring the comments section. What a viewer says has to be kept in check. Feedback can make or break a fledgling channel. Got to keep the trolls from verbally abusing what is to be your fanbase as it were.

All these things I mentioned and it is still not the whole picture. Quite a bit more than just hit record, talk to yourself, upload, and relax isn't it? And this doesn't even begin to talk on Live Streams and all the other things you might need to do to promote yourself. Times you may have to whore yourself like a hooker on prom night. Or you can try to latch onto a more popular up and comer just to promote your own channel. Which is why so many go into podcasts. There at least you are talking to someone else and can bounce off of them when it coms to your own content interests.

Heh! Now to try and crunch all this down to the poor chap who E Mailed me. And people wonder why I seem so standoffish at times. Just explaining all that makes one just want to crawl back into their beds and as they do flip a bird at their monitors.

 

[Hush]

Todays topics on You Tube are less than stellar so far. EA is trying to push loot box like mechanics in kids toy adverts. South Park supposedly pissed off folks with their pandemic episode, more Japanese games ditch PlayStation in favor of X-Box due to the strange new censorships the former seems intent on introducing. On that first story I could not help but put a comment in that reflects my thoughts to a T. Would repeat the comment but surprisingly You Tube would bend more for the sarcasm than this site might so let's not!

Past that I writing while my own video uploads. Notice I never speak on my own channel directly or name any others specifically? While open to speaking on the ins and outs of the business I do separate and I certainly respect the privacy of those I 'work' around. Some I associate with on the platform do not even know I have a channel of my own, and I hardly want them to! It leaves me free to put out my own thoughts on their topics out there in the comments without inviting the trollish fops to my own door.

Had one commenter that was damned and determined to make me break my objective points in favor of subjective opinions. He tried to insult my ideas up until he found he could not fault the logic, so instead he tried to verbally attack me. Trying to question my patriotism when he found I had served. Then my manhood when he found I was male. Even tried the 'come face me on discord unless you are a chicken'. I saw and see no point to even consider Discord. Nothing there that I could not state in the comments of You Tube. Only reason he wanted to drag me there was to try and say things the current platform we were on would not allow. Which meant he tried hate speech and the like. Besides. Our little discussion was doing wonders for the content creators views. Many were clicking on an hourly basis to see what would flow forth from our fingers in retort, which meant the video was getting multiple views. Win Win for everyone.. Expect for the poor twit who wanted to argue while I was focused on it being a debate and treated it thusly. And to her credit the creator did not try to interfere when he got heated over my 'innocent' jabs to his ego. She even allowed some of his more.. Colorful? Comments go through when she could have blocked them entirely. Something I gladly thanked her for.

Yes. I can be overtly sarcastic. In fact that is my favorite past time once in awhile. But never would I let it come before putting my case out there in the comments themselves. Consider the objective being my main course and verbal thorns are my sweet and savory after meal delight. That of course being said, I do know how to incite anger if I so wish it. Once I got beneath his skin during our exchange I did what I found works best to both insult while diminish his next arguments. Just be polite. Apologize when they could not seem to grasp the simplicities you speak. When egos flare people tend to go onto one of two tracks. Either they defend or wildly swing. Either fails to do any real damage to the words you already spoke so you are free to press in further, laying more points and laying a foundation they find close to impossible to refute. Of course your arguments have to have some merit or you are merely bluffing, and in debate a bluff hardly lends any merit to your side at all. Funny in a way how that self same premise can hold true to so many other pursuits.

So many look at things where people differ as a one side must win. Maybe that is due to the gaming worlds influence or other factors like it that molds minds into thinking one must lose and one must win. Don't misunderstand. In games of course that is normally the case. But there are so many sorts of contests that ask for so much more than prowess alone in order to succeed.

Once when I was but a pup I fell in love with music. I was not content to just sing, but play instruments as well. First was the tin sandwich. Got my ands on a C harmonica and learned how to trill and toot as well as anyone around me. Took awhile but I loved it! No where would I ever claim to be an expert but that mattered not to what I guess most would call my soul. When I caught the pitch I held tight and rode each note like it held my entire breath within. Without my knowledge one of my elder cousins decided that I needed to be taken down a peg for some reason. Not sure why. I was like Pan and he was akin to Apollo in most things and we both knew it. Anyway.. He had entered me in a talent contest. Also waited until the day before to announce this to my family and me simultaneously. They seemed pleased. My father thundered threats if I embarrassed him, but that to me was par for the course. I would be beat for doing well but never well enough or for failing something. Either way I would be black and blue while thankful if he didn't break one of my bones in his efforts.

Day of I found that I was one of the younger contestants. Not the youngest by far. Those made it due to being cute. Older ones had proficiencies in their crafts (be it magic, comedy, or other arts). Each astounded me and drew me into their own performances so much that I felt fairly inadequate. Can remember it quite clearly. Dressed in my jeans, small flannel shirt, fumbling just to get my harmonica out. I must have looked so silly wetting my lips by sucking on each before I made my mouth into a bridge time and again to loosen up those stubborn cheek muscles. Yes.. There were snickers and nervous laughs from those in the audience. I could hardly see from the stage lighting but I imagined the whole of Killarney out there as the judges asked what I intended to play. I more croaked than said the name of the tune "You've Got a Friend". Normally that would be something better suited for a lower key, but I managed by playing dominantly on the right side on that small instrument I considered a trusted friend.

And it didn't let me down. Made it well into the mid range of the competition without having to do anything. While others were performing this one other instrumentalist and I sat down together behind the curtain and gushed about everyone who had shown their wares. It was a truly enjoyable chat. He was somewhere I had to wager in his thirties or so. Jovial was not even a strong enough word for him. He was like a young Santa if he really existed. No.. Not because he was fat. Just so friendly he could made the dead sit up and smile. Sadly the conversation had to take a for he had to perform. You see he had yet to play, and his instrument of choice was a Baby Grand. By all the tips of a pentacle could he play that thing.. And it was just a loaner at that! I do not know the song to this day something that sounded classical in nature that felt like thunder in my chest as it reached its pinnacle. Couldn't help myself. When he finished I stood up and went to the edge just outside of view from the crowd and gave the best round of clapping I had yet to at that age. Think my hands were swollen afterwards but he deserved the applause and I wanted to know it had reached someone other than the audience.

Of course I could never compete with that. I knew it and I am sure the judges did as well. But we had another number to do after the first round of contestants were sent home for somehow I had made it through their preliminaries. I always think to this day it was at the skin of my teeth despite what folks told me afterwards. When we sat back down he told me a bit of his own history. Classically trained, he had been playing longer than I had even been alive at that point. He had even been invited to join some fairly large venues.. Well at least in Ireland they were huge. Of course had to ask him for tips. On that he said time is the best teacher but I had heart so that can more than make up for it until then. He made it clear through our talk that playing for him had become more mechanical than inspirational. Don't ask me why exactly but it made me sad for him. Was so young I could not see no less understand how music failed to resonate on the same scale it did for me. Like I said.. I was a pup.

Things seemed to drag on after our talk. So much so that the judges decided to shorten things up in a most peculiar way. So during the intermission we were told that due to their initial competitions the judges had decided who was gong to likely come out in the top three slots. I was fourth and of course was crest fallen. A singer who had done a rousing rendition of Billy Joel's Uptown Girl was to be 3rd, my new friend was to be 2nd, and 1st was going to a comedian who I admit had me in stitches after only 15 or so seconds of speaking. Was so used to adults having the final word I couldn't help but feel dejected though I knew I had no place complaining. Those who were in those spots more than earned them. However the singer was not so easily sated. Red as a ripe cherry tomato he went out and spoke to the judges rather tersely I think. Either that or he was giving his best impression of s pissed off rooster. When he did come back it was nearly time for our finals as it were. Guess he was quick on the draw or determined to give that comedian a true gambit run for he convinced the judges to allow for a slight alteration that would give them some extra minutes while still allowing us to compete.

Idea was simple. They would risk their 2nd and 3rd place standings if we were allowed to form a trio. At first he had sworn that he was going to go for a duo but there had already been duos therefore it would not be fair to change things that way, at least that was the judges first shut down of his idea. So trio it was. Guess he figured I was so small I couldn't detract all that much from their efforts. Another chance to play was more than I could hope for so of course I eagerly agreed.. Our possible third however had some reservations. Couldn't blame him. His position was good enough for him. Maybe if it were just he and that singer it would have stayed that way. But with my exuberance and beaming face I guess he lost the old business before friendship emotional tug of war. So we agreed. On the proviso that I pick the song for us.

That took we other two back a smidge. Sure I knew some tunes and could play many by ear, but I had never once read from any sheet music. Plus there wasn't all that many sheets of music to choose from! Think now that I look back upon it was fairly smart of him to pull this wild card like he did. He knew I only had my own training by listening then playing, he was classically trained so he wouldn't be expected to know anting either of us may have known, and the singer only had his one book of sheets from a single artist. You would almost see the smug indentions of a smile form on his lips as those facts slowly dawned on me but I was taught to make do with what I had. Grabbed that book from Mr. Billy Joel fan and poured through it. A few caught my eye but nothing truly spoke to me. That is until I stopped on a particular one. This one was so damned fitting it was like a sign from Saint Peter.. Or Paul.. or Mary.

Couldn't help but show my eager delight as I handed those lone two sheets over to the two. The singer knew this one and our impromptu piano player both laughed and groaned at the irony of my choice. He did fairly warn us that we wouldn't have a chance to practice as he might like but he was semi confident we could pull this off.

The handful of remaining contestants did their thing. Now they had a fighting chance since 2 positions were off the table and even my non prize winning 4th was also available. The judges announced the change we had made which seemed to draw a few boos and hisses, (Got to remember this is Ireland we are talking about and intermission normally comes with a few pints downed and some pissing to make room for later inebriations.) and also they decided it best to put the comedian back out before us to quell those angry sods. Different material he put out and I am sure it was as good as the first bits. Couldn't remember nor laugh at what was said. My mind set on the chords and possible harmonies I needed to contribute.

Finally it was our turn. Nerves began to fray as I took a seat on this stool I was offered. The mic for my own height was used for the piano so it was either that or go without the amplification. There were a few murmurs and a woot or two but strangely the lack of sound made me more nervous than possible negative reactions. Then we started.. Or should I say I started. The song was Piano Man and my harmonica seemed to whistle out that starter without me even being invited to join. As my part began to end our own piano man began to join in. It was absolutely perfect. That is until our singer began. Not sure what their issue was, but piano seemed to compete for the stage with his medium ranged voice. So less than 30 seconds in and there was absolutely no way they were going to match tempo to tone. I only had until the end of that line 'tonic and gin' before I had to pipe up again so I made a split second decision. One I knew the others may not, like but for me it was a screw it sort of moment. So off I hoped off that stool which parked me far off to the side and a half jog/half slid across the stage until I came to the piano bench. Made it just in time too for I was only at half lung capacity when my part came in. I played while angling up. My eyes screwed shut so I didn't have to look at the dirty stares and started to bob my head at a slower pace as the notes broke free from my wind pipe outwards so all could hear.

What I had done and not because I thought myself better or more skilled was slow the pacing down. What any who are musicians will tell you (if they are worth the weight of their instrument) is each is to accompany the other, not drown out each other. An ebb and flow if you will so they compliment and not clash. If it ruins the piece then proper tempo be damned. Took a second or three for our maestro to catch on but I could hear the difference more acutely with my eyes closed. Slower tempo, softer strikes on the keys, and then our singer came over a couple of feet closer and began his next bit. "He said son can you play me a memory, not really sure how it goes." At that moment it wasn't them vs me or the adults vying against each other. We were in harmony. At that very second I didn't care about the beating I was going to likely get, or not winning, or even the crowds and lights. All that mattered was those vibrations as my lungs felt free to give them every ounce of air I had and his voice and that piano resonating like a vocal bubble.

How it turned out doesn't matter. All that led up to this moment didn't either. Point is it really wasn't about winning or losing. Wasn't because I wanted to be right or I wanted to beat anyone. I just wanted to get my music out just as a debater wants to get their side out. Might not change minds or the world around them but least they had their say and the opposition listened.

For the record though? Still have that damned harmonica to this day.

 

[Hush]

Great news for me despite having a case of lead arms. Peace Talks arrived as did the vinyl record. There was a long pause in the making of the record thanks to Covid which is utterly paradoxical considering the making of it was to support Doctors Without Borders and the research for the cure to Covid itself. Must admit that crowdfunding was a brilliant idea rather than just sating buy this and proceeds will go out to help. Funimation and the cast of Bebop/Seatbelts/voice talents from various games and animes/JPop stars/Rappers were a nice touch in garnering more support and I must say I have more than a modicum of pride in being a part of it all. Total goal was only a few thousand and we managed to net out over 10k. And best part of all? All the proceeds went in for the projects intended charities rather than some rich actor/actress/company. Took a bit of fine tuning to get that accomplished, but when they decided to cover the costs of manufacturing with iTunes sales of the single we were eustatic! I'll pop a pic in the end of this post of these two things. Mostly because I know I will wear them down quickly and a memory of when they were new and non blemished would be nice.

So far today the news front has been awash with politics. Pelosi putting that horrible bill that does very little for the people in our country here, Mr Sweet Potato and his wife testing positive for Covid, Rick Moranis getting sucker punched in NYC for no apparent reason, Inktober partnering with Primal and Adult Swim and the controversy involved with that . Not much I would enjoy reporting on today so far but the day is far from finished yet.

Also I have been chewing over the idea of a request thread again. I saw one last eve that gave me such a chuckle that I was sorely tempted in contacting if for no other purpose than to congratulate them on it. Would I try to pick up a story with them? Doubtful. As it is I have written a few people offering ideas and the like, but I know how it is here. Even back in the day you could send requests to those who say they are friendly or despises when people do not have the decency to say Yay or Nay, only to ignore potential new partners entirely for what ever reason. But I am far older than I was at that time and feel no real rejection at those prospects. My writing acuity hasn't diminished all that much from then to now, I just enjoy descriptive writing and of course quantity so if they can't glean that? 'Vivre et laisser vivre!' as the old idiom goes. Still.. Might be fun to create a request thread of my own just to cement my place rather than living on the digital fringes. No hurry though. I still have time and many an idea to work the creases from before I go down that route.


Think for a few hours I will relax and do a few stretches while listening to some of my current comedy/music obsessions. Been going through a phase where Tim Minchin really speaks to me. Always is it a strange cohabitation in my mind where adding a bit of music can at times simplify thoughts while connecting them to emotions one can't express through common place alone. Then we can see just where we stand on recording something for the Tube today.

​

 

[Hush]

Spoke earlier of Tim Minchin. An Aussie I actually enjoy listening to. Always had a soft spot for comedy in my heart. Maybe that is due to that sarcastic streak that is housed somewhere within my spine and made its lay to the base of my skull? Nah. I'm a natural ass and I just like it that way. Most Irish are known for their charm and beguiling ways. I was the one of hundred that much rather piss a person off and get it over with rather than polish a turd and call it gold. Could I possibly be the reverse? Sure! But sooner or later a golden tongue tends to weigh down the truth and I abhor that notion. 'Sides. A good spat or fight clears the air while beguiling words tends to just muddy the waters.

Of course my jobs gives most the idea that I am more water and air rather than fire and earth. ~Shrugs~ If it helps them sleep and night I will let those around me think just that. Those that really know the man can't seem to wrap their head around why people seem to see me that way. At first glance folks see the wheel chair. One or two conversations and that image is the last thing they associate with me. Fiercely independent and have been that way since my crib. Any who dare grab the handles of my chair always gets the fair warning that unless they want their hands like my legs they best remove their mitts gives that little 'helpless' myth a burial in the Marianas Trench. Hell I have gotten released from Doctors for headbutting them for Cremini sakes. Not that I am violent. I just hate when they risk my life due to absolute incompetence. And trust me. I have had more than my share of people trying to see if they could shorten my life. Opposing soldiers, ex lovers.. Well, let me prove my point. When I was recovering in an old folks home once I was released from the VA I happened to begin dating one of the nursing assistants in charge of my case. She was QUITE a bit younger than I, but we had fun. That was until she decided to become what I term as clingy. Most would call it jealous or obsessive on her part but I gave the benefit of the doubt. This was of course well against the rules. Can't go dating those you medicate and look after. I didn't care.. Should have, but didn't at the time.

Decided to check myself out for a few days. Being cooped up is not something I am good at and I had a bit of spending money due to me burning movies off of Pirate Bay for a few months for the majority of the staff. When I told her I was going out for a few she got quite offended. Accused me of just trying to go out and get laid. Which of course I not only scoffed at but also had to joke over. Made it clear that if I had any inclination of cheating on her I could just as easily do it there at the home rather than waste money going out. She knew that to be true. I may have been her senior by close to double numbers, but the ladies that lived there were nearly 30 years my senior.. So to them I was something of a catch should I have allowed that to happen.

I put her anger off to youth and collected my packs of meds from her that would last me a few days. Give her a bit of time to cool off and a few calls and we would be fine. Swung by a store for some spirits, snacks, then went to a local dive hotel.. One which you had to check under black light sort of dive and proceeded to settle in. Felt good not having a room mate and the snacks were settling in fine like. Hoped in my chair and rode across the way to a cheap fast food setup and wolfed down some real greasy food as opposed to the slop served in the home then went back. As I was pulling in the owner of the hotel came out and said that some crazed woman had been looking for me in the parking lot. When he refused to let her in my room she had done a few donuts and rode off. Okay.. Maybe a simple phone call wouldn't quell her anger. No matter. I would just go to my room and deal with her insanity in the morn. Hunkering down in my bed I changed and got ready to doze off when it dawned on me I had forgotten to take my meds.

So now off to the bathroom I went. Rather tired I failed to really take into account much that could be off about the situation. Normal six bottles worth of different types I just popped one of each into my palm and was about to down them when I noticed one pill a powder blue color. Pink, red, yellow, and white. Those were the shades I gulped down each night. Last I checked none of those were blue. So I looked at each bottle. All them were the proper names and dosages I was accustomed to. Maybe it was just a substitute for one of my generic brands? Best to double check. So I dug out my laptop and began to look for variations of my current scripts trying to find this blue one. Nope. None of them were that shade. Finally I decided to work off the fairly obscure number etched into the pill. Ten minutes later I sat gob smacked as I found the proper result. Not only was it not one of the scripts I took but it was something I was deathly allergic to! You'd think that someone made a small mistake except for one small detail. It was my current lover who filled the bottles with my meds. She knew better than anyone else there what would cause me harm. So yes I called her then and there. She answered rather surprised that it was me calling. When I confronted her she admitted rather smugly that yes she did it and she meant to do it as well. Figured in her own twisted mind that I couldn't dick around on her if I was hospitalized.

That of course ended our relationship in my mind right then and there. Left me in a bit of a conundrum though. If I turned her in I would be sealing her termination notice. If I didn't it would just be a matter of time before she did this again to me or worse. It is one thing when deployed if you get fired upon. I had that risk more than once outside the wire. I signed up for it and knew the risks. This though was a different ball of wax to contend with. So what did I do you may wonder? I did the only thing I could think of. I waited for her and I to be together there at the home a few nights later and confronted her face to face while the head of the establishment happened to be working. I knew that would limit her possible actions unless she wanted to lose her job. Made it clear under no uncertain terms that it was over between us. Also made it crystal that if she tried to get froggy I would gig her to the wall then and there. She knew the generals of my own record and military history. She knew I had no qualms over taking a life if I needed to. What she didn't know was if I would be willing to harm a lady. Luckily for me she decided not to test to see if I were bluffing or not. We didn't speak after that night. She did try to make my life difficult in other ways. One of which was sending her kin there when she knew I would be heading out for the eve to try and intimidate me. Didn't go well for them and that is all I should say on that. But it did sour me more than not on wanting to allow anyone into my life romantically. Not saying I have yet to do so here and there. But now I refuse to get attached or even allow myself any feelings short of limited term enjoyment.

 

[Hush]

Lasts night recording was a last minute decision and I had something of a special guest. Since I wanted to take something of a breather I asked a fairly prominent virologist in my state to pop on and answer some questions. This went well outside my own fields of knowledge (as well as typical channels specialty) so it was enlightening though wont be allowed to be monetized. One issue within the topic was quite telling now that I had some time to replay the entirety of the whole thing. If we have so many ignorant people who still want to consider Covid a hoax, how will we convince them to take a vaccine if and when it is mass produced? Which I thought was an excellent point until I truly started to ponder it. We are by definition a social creature. Even down to forming connections with others it boils down to biology. How are those social bonds formed? Through repeated interactions. We associate feelings which are then connected to the interactions with specific people. Which relegates things like love and hate when it comes to those people or groups. Very few have strictly positive interactions when it comes to police, so we tend to place them all in the negative grouping due to the uniform more so than the individuals behavior. How as a general rule do we punish those who do wrong? We separate them from the collective. Ergo jails, prisons, and even in those places we separate the worst even further through absolute isolation.

Working upwards.. That is one reason why we are rebelling through riots and the like, and ultimately looking for any and all excuses to do the opposite of what will eventually protect us. We needed to find a reason to ignore the basic laws of human preservation which are ingrained within us. That of course includes the 'It's a hoax' philosophy. So it is simply logical that people in large droves will refute that the vaccine is just that. Or the polar opposite may happen. They will assume one shot or pill is all it takes to become immune. Which is simply silly to assume. It is after all a virus. Think of it much like we do the flu. Can you get that repeated times? Of course! Even with a flu shot it doesn't make us immune from it. The shot merely makes the body think it has it so it begins to release the proper counter measures. Doesn't even last through a years time. So what makes anyone truly think it will solve any problems by taking an initial dose? At least that will be one of the many counters that I can already hear the public yearn to say.

Personally I prescribe to a rather pessimistic belief. Our world has over sterilized itself. We no longer even allow children to play in parks where the equipment can do harm. We over fill foods with anti this and that. We have in essence made it so that children's bodies (or minds) can no longer fight off things so they become prone to both physical and mental woes. Now i am not saying I am more resilient than many people. If anything I may have become more prone than I ever was due to aging. In fact one of my few advantages comes from having a rare condition which causes my blood to be more viscous as well as clots more frequently. I.E. I get cut and my body stops the bleeding within minutes so long as I do not get a nicked artery. But that is only good for external injuries rather than internal ones since that very clotting is what can induce heart attacks if not kept in check. Though it is something of a cute parlor trick I do admit. Plus it comes in handy in fights which is something I gladly admit I used to my advantage when I was a scrappy youth. But back on topic.. This retraction of things children need in order to build natural immunities can cause detrimental effects later on in life. One such thing is countering viral infections.

And I am sure many would scoff at that. But let us face facts. One of the first counters hospitals use after saline IV's are steroids. What do steroids do that is negative? They compromise the immune system, and that lasts for days after the initial dosing. Now of course while i a hospitals care they are sure to pump you full of antibiotics. But what after you are discharged? You are still compromised for days. Now follow that logic step by step. You have those steroids in your system and they almost always supply you with more through proscriptions to last for somewhere near to if not double a weeks time. So they should during that period give you equal amounts of antibiotics right? Nay! They give you a prescription for only two to three days. So that remainder of time you are taking something that puts your body in the red without a counter to things that could attack you while you are compromised. That is how the medical field works. Also it is why you will 40% of the time get sick from some other ailment days after you leave the hospitals care.

So now we circle back around to Corona itself. Even if they make a vaccine for it you can still get it again. Not to mention with all this supposed fast tracking the clinical trials will give jaded if not utterly useful data to even prove if it works.. No less the side effects that will go unnoticed. The symptoms are much like SARS. Quite devastating to live through and that is if I am being generous. The only sure way not to et it is to keep clear of possible infected people and places those people have been. People will not do that, or they will consider themselves and only themselves for that is yet another folly of youth. And frankly that irks me. They heard that only those who are older are at risk of dying so they care not if they become carriers even if that means risking the lives of those who may be more easily targeted by the pathogen.

Let us add up what has been stated thus far and be reasonable about it. People are social creatures who tend to use any excuse in order to meet their desired quota of interaction in a days time. Many will refuse treatments to stem the possible infections. Some will claim hoax. It will roughly take at least twenty years to truly isolate and contain the sickness even if a vaccine is made and fast tracked to come out sometime around March of next year (that is me being optimistic time scale wise rather than being pragmatic). People will not continue to take the needed precautions when dealing with others such as washing hands and giving one another space and yes, I think people are are too lazy to argue this for if they were trying, these spikes would not be occurring now would they? Quite a few will not take the social responsibility claiming it is their right to refuse preventative treatments even if they do come out. I know.. Many would claim otherwise, but remember how hard it is to convince people to use condoms, not run stop signs or red lights, pay attention while driving as not to not rear end the car in front of them, not litter, not pollute, etc, and so on, and so forth. It would be easier to scold an elephant successfully than to get people to take social responsibilities seriously. So this cycle will keep on occurring due to one person being irresponsible while 50 people around him/her are behaving.

Sounds horrible I agree. And that sort of negativity would be what a protagonist would say in one of those cheesy save the earth sort of movies. One of my regular commenters over on You Tube is a bit of a conspiracy nut. Love him though due to the humor his words bring. But anywho. He thinks that China released this sickness as it were knowing full well that the US would get hit hardest and longest. Because we value our freedom to such a zealot like state that we would consciously (or carelessly) infect one another time and again. His thought process is thus. We here in the US, U.K., and Canada due to our 'freedoms' will rinse and repeat ourselves to death while more shall we say 'strict' countries such as China, what remains of Russia, Germany, and Japan will enforce their lockdowns so they will in effect stop the virus's spread faster. Thus lowering the numbers and military abilities of the less communistic parts of the world. Now I do not quite think it will come to all that. Though I do agree with the idea that for a short while each continent needs to lock down its borders (more so than we currently are) until we get things under control, or at least a more manageable solution is found lest we just start the cycle over again. Say something akin to the 9-11 strictures but focusing on health rather than bomb detection may help.

I think he is funneling The Stand with Red Dawn sort of ideologies as did my guest speaker when we spoke afterwards. Either way it is both frightening and enlightening what he said and what people seem to think at this moment over the topic and I could go on more over what we spoke on and read but I rather keep this floating about in my head so the thoughts can marinate before I go on over the rest of the convo. Though one thing I can say semi off topic. We had so much that we covered I could easily make this a two or three part video rather than just this one off. But I would need to space it out a wee bit so I do not throw off You Tubes algorithms yet again. My so called 'Partner' You Tube gave me once I did reach a certain subscriber base whines when I muck about with content as I did when I broached this subject (and a few other touchy subjects in the past I wanted to cover).