Star Wars College AU (Solo & Sabre)

[Solo]

Ben should know better than to think that would be the end of it. When she redirects the conversation to something he's more comfortable with—and he never thought he would describe calculus as a more comfortable anything, but it's definitely preferred to discussing his trainwreck of a family—he actually makes an effort to grasp the material. He'd been at least somewhat trying since the beginning of their tutoring, but as he's grown to know her, he's found himself trying a lot harder, as though becoming good with the material will somehow mean he's become good with her. It's a strange language, a strange way to try to impress her, but even if he doesn't really care what grade he gets in the class as long as he passes, it seems like she does, and that's enough to spur him on.​

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They fall into their comfortable brand of silence, one Ben's grown to love—it isn't the oppressive silence between him and his mentor, with Ben scrambling to try and figure out what he's done wrong, or the tense silence that hangs over family gatherings, like it was just waiting for someone to say something so it can explode into a cacophony of voices. It's nice, and it's comfortable, and of course, that meant it couldn't last.​

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She breaks the silence, recounting her ridiculous ideas of what they'd done over break. The thought of any of those things happening in the Solo household was silly, though he supposed he couldn't rule out the possibility of an estranged sibling showing up. It wasn't like they had ever paid much attention to the child they did have, and with Han gone more than he was home, it wouldn't be the craziest thing in the world to find out he'd drunkenly fathered another kid he didn't take care of.​

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"Well, at least it wasn't that bad," he mumbles. The examples she'd given made the real events look tamer in comparison, and he is almost embarrassed that he doesn't have as eventful a story to tell her as the ones she'd dreamed up. "Just a lot of fighting. Let's just say my parents don't exactly approve of my choices in education and in my future." It's a simplified, almost political answer, and one that he doubts will satisfy her curiosity, so he sighs and shuts his book loudly, leaning back in the chair with his arms folded across his chest.​

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"I know you—what was it you said?—don't pay attention to gossip or whatever, but there's no way you go here and don't know the name Organa. There's a whole wing named after her, and there's a reason for it: she funded it herself. My uncle? Luke Skywalker, yeah, that one. And my dad? Well, your guess is as good as mine who Han Solo is. Not like I've seen him enough to form an opinion." Bitterness laced his tone, the venom evident with every word. "And I'm the black sheep, the family disappointment for wanting to make a name on my own rather than rely on fucking hand-outs."​

 

[Sabre]

“It wasn’t that bad.” Ben says, and Rey can’t help but frown at him and want to mock him a little, but she figures that’s not exactly going to get her feeling across.
“But It was still bad.”

The weight of Rey’s head fall in her palm as she lends Ben a sympathetic ear, and what she hears doesn’t exactly shock her but it is confusing. Her brows wrinkle and she shakes her head. “Why? You’re doing great at school, even in calculus! And-“ she could go on, especially about his job? internship? Last she heard through the grapevine he had a great one lined up but she isn’t familiar with it other than him being worked to the bone.

The wrinkle on Rey’s brow deepens with every word Ben elaborates on the situation. Its true that she knew of the name Organa, that it meant money to a lot of people, but she hardly understood the weight of it until she met Ben and did a little research. Still, it didn’t mean nearly as much to her as it seemed to most others. Possibly because she’s a foreigner and pretty detached overall from American politics.

“Of course I’ve heard the name Organa, since I use those buildings all the time. I didn’t really care or pay attention to how often I heard the name or not until I met you, then I- well I did start to actively hear it a little more, enough to know your moms a politician and it’s a ‘big deal’ to a lot of people. I have no idea who Luke Skywalker and Han Solo are but I’m guessing it’s a similar ‘big deal’ situation, right?”

Rey leans back into her chair, contemplating as she rubs her thumb in circles just above her knee. From where she’s sitting it sounds like a mess and she says so. “Sounds like a mess to me. It’s unfair that they expect you to shoulder the burden of carrying a legacy you didn’t ask for. Thats the real price of ever accepting those handouts, isn’t it?”
There’s also the inkling that maybe his family is just trying to help him, even if they are misguided and expect too much, but she can’t say that for certain without meeting them and thats unlikely to happen. The more she thinks about his family invalidating his feelings, and them fighting over him making choices different then their own, the more strongly she feels about it. It makes her angrier than she expected.

“I don’t understand how they can dislike your career and education choices so much that they want to fight about it? That’s atrocious, you’re doing great for yourself. Anyone can see that you study and do your job relentlessly and work yourself to exhaustion to secure your future. They should be proud.” Her arms fold, her fingers twitch like they’re being pricked with agitation.

“It worse that it was like that over the holiday, when families around suppose to come together and y’know, be happy and stuff. Were they needling you all week?”
Surely that wasn’t the norm? It went unsaid, but Rey started to wonder if the fighting and disapproval was recent or if Ben’s family life was always like that. What if it was worse the longer the family spent time together? Like the nearly three week Christmas vacation? That scenario made her worry just to think it.

 

[Solo]

It's been years since he's discussed his family with-- anyone, really. No one really seems to care whenever he brings it up, and quite a few (others on the water polo team, mainly, since he rarely socialized with anyone else) even mocked him for thinking his problems were anything in the grand scheme of things. While he could realize that others surely have it more difficult, that didn't make his issues with his family any less real, at least in his eyes. Rey is the first person who's taken him seriously in longer than he can remember, and he finds himself floundering at how to take it.​

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She's this polite to everyone, he thinks, convincing himself that it's no different from how she'd treat any of her friends, but even that thought shines a spotlight on the fact that he considers them friends. That brings up two more points for him to overanalyze: one, does she feel the same way, and two, how significant is it that he's this willing to call her a friend? He's known people for years and years that he wouldn't think twice about denying that about them, but this girl who's tutored him for a few months is suddenly in such high regard, and it's jarring.​

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"A similar big deal situation. You could say that," Ben scoffs and rolls his eyes at the mention of his other family. "Luke Skywalker, savant extraordinaire and author of any number of papers on philosophy of the atmosphere or whatever the hell hippy-dippy bullshit he's spouting off about now. Han Solo, who holds more NHRA records than any other drag racer since cars were invented. Leia Organa-- well, I don't have to go there. She practically paid for the whole fucking school. If she didn't, her parents did."​

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Bitterness laces through his tone as he speaks, increasingly getting more heated until he has a fistful of his hoodie's fabric wrapped in his hand, the only thing protecting his nails from digging into his palm. "They don't give a damn about me. They care about the status that I could bring them, or how it'll look when I work for someone who directly opposes my mother's campaign, or how much of a shame it'll be when their only child isn't around to do photo ops anymore and make them look better in the media. If they think they're gonna hear a word from me after my degree's in my hands, they're delusional." It sounds selfish, and he knows it, but how can he want to go back to people that do nothing but make him feel bad about himself? Sure, Snoke does the same, but at least he does it because he wants Ben to succeed... Right?​

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"That's an understatement," he answers and rolls his eyes again. "At least we made it through the first course of the meal this time. It's a record for us," he mocks derisively. "I finished up my mashed potatoes and took a bottle of liquor up to my room. Didn't come out the rest of the weekend until I drove home with a hangover. Wouldn't recommend that, by the way. I think I still have a headache." He purposefully ceases to mention that he'd almost broken down and called her; truthfully, he doesn't know if that's a real memory or if his drunken mind had made it up, and even if it is real, it's the last thing he wants to get into.​