There's no time for us. There's no place for us.
What is this thing that builds our dreams,
Yet slips away from us?
What is this thing that builds our dreams,
Yet slips away from us?
It happened like clockwork every other Saturday. He'd come home, the condo next to her own, for about five to six hours and then leave again later that evening to get in his car and leave. Sometimes Aine would sit at her window and watch the beautiful creature with the long red hair and those dark, wicked eyes. Something in her chest would constrict and her stomach would get this fluttering sensation like she was nervous or doing something bad. Maybe it was bad sitting here just to watch him come home and then leave. Oh, she never sat there for five or six hours straight. Just... just checked. Pressing a hand against the small of her belly, she gasped softly. The pain, what she thought was pain, always felt so pleasant. Warm, tender... so warm. It was probably the reason why she reduced herself to this lowly stage in her life. Spying, stalking. Watching her neighbor as he went about his life.
She laughed softly at the idea. At one time, she honestly thought he was a woman! And that had bothered her. Was she attracted to women? Oh what a fuss her mother would have thrown. No, he was definitely a man. She caught him washing that car of his bare chested and god, he looked like some sort of, well, god! Maybe she was just being a stupid, over protected teenager. Which was kind of funny. Girls her age already had a job, knew how to drive and went on dates regularly. That's what seventeen year olds did, right? And soon she would be eighteen. Legal. Just a couple of days. Licking her lips, she pressed her forehead against the cool window pane.
What kind of girls did he find attractive? Maybe he preferred men. He certainly was pretty enough and Aine wasn't stupid. Just ignorant. Raking her fingers across the cool glass, she flung herself away. This wasn't puppy love or genuine love. He just represented everything she wanted. Freedom, knowledge and beauty. The ability to go anywhere and do anything. In her mind, she always pictured him as a model or something fascinating. If only she knew... could she know?
She could. Aine just needed the courage to approach him. Just once. Maybe a hi or hello? It was about time for him to leave and the mailbox for the entire complex was just a short walk away. They could bump into each other. She could look at him in person for the first time. She could, she really could! Just... courage.
Biting her plump bottom lip, she dashed off into her room and checked herself in the mirror. Blonde and blue eyed. She was her mother's perfect little girl. Natural hair that had been cut short above her shoulders for summer and wide blue eyes that competed with the seasonal skies. So bright, so beautiful. That's what her mother thought. She felt plain, personally. Tugging on a pink shirt and white shorts, she rushed down the stairs while pulling a brush through her hair and slipped on a pair of sandals. Even her mother picked out her own clothing. Everything was planned in her life. Except for him. He was her secret little fantasy, her guilty pleasure. And she was going to look into those eyes.
Even if it was just for a moment.
"I'm going out, mom!", she shouted before hitting the door. The family dog, really her dog, following close at heel. If she was excited, the dog became excited.
"Where are you going?" An older woman came out of the living room to watch her with narrowed eyes.
"Just to get... ah, stop it, Dakota!" The white husky mix suddenly latched onto her leg and started humping air. That always embarrassed her. When Koti became over excited, she did things like that. She batted the animal away while reaching for the door knob. Her leg, just one, already started showing those red scratches from her dog's claws. Not bleeding. Just irritated. "Just going to get the mail, that's all. We have Netflix coming in, right? Right! So, I'll be right back."
Finally out the door! She stopped. Damn. Biting her lip again, she knocked on her own front door and waited for it to open. That was when her mother cracked it just far enough to thrust the mailbox keys out. In the background, she could hear Dakota terrorizing one of the cats. If it couldn't play with humans then she started nipping and grooming the other animals. One cat liked it... the other, an old male, not so much.
"Forgot the key, yeah. Thanks, mom."
With the key palmed into her hand, she turned to leave. Freedom! It was almost time. Almost... she stopped on the side walk. Gotta be cool. People are friendly here. They always say hello or hi and wave. No big deal. Just... she stopped just in front of his place, her lips parted as those bright blue eyes sought him and his car.