His Greatest Treasure (Crusade & darkangel76)

Emma just gazed into Jake's eyes, her body feeling more than sated. He'd opened her up to an entirely new world, one she wanted to explore fully and with only him. It was thrilling, exciting and so very dangerous. Everything about it made her body tingle and in ways she'd only dreamed, fantasizing and writing about in her novels where the guy gets the girl and the girl finds her one. Well, she'd found her one all right. And it was more than she could've hoped for. Jake was the embodiment of every hero she'd dared to write...better! No...perfect! She looked at him with such longing, such desire and—oh god, she couldn't help herself—love. But he'd done it! He'd made her fall for him completely!

Basking in the afterglow of their lovemaking, Emma just wanted the moment to last. When Jake suddenly sat up and moved to get his clothes, she wasn't sure what was going on, what had changed. The heat in the room suddenly began to dissipate and she wondered if she'd done something horribly wrong or if the wish she'd made had gone sour or...

Or if she'd truly just been the stupidest girl to have ever lived!

Emma's muscles tensed and she twitched slightly, unsure if she should move. Jake had told her to remain as she was, to not get up. But...he was leaving? He looked startled, like he suddenly woke up to reality and realized he'd made the biggest mistake of his life!

No, just no! This couldn't be happening!

Emma felt her face grow hot, her eyes stinging as she fought to hold back the tears. What had she done? Could she fix it? She was about to lose her biggest fan, the best lover she'd ever known! And, truly, the only man she wanted to be with for all time. She wanted to share her secrets with him, learn his, grow with him! Just...what? Why? She clamped her eyes shut as she heard him pull up his pants and then dart out of her room. Hearing his footstep on the hardwood floor were enough to make her sit up. She bolted up, her body trembling, shaking, she peeked out the door, but he'd gone.

He'd left her.

Overcome with grief, confused, mortified, Emma walked back into her room and over toward her window. She hardly cared that she wasn't dressed. She'd just had her heart broken. Jake had ripped it from her heart and thrown it onto the ground like it hadn't meant anything at all. Oh, how could she have been so stupid! To think moments ago she was giddy to share great news with Jess about the new man in her life. She hadn't expected him to turn into a one night stand...not when he promised...

"They always promise," Jess said over the cell phone.

Emma could barely contain her sobs. "No. He was different! He really was. If you'd have met him, you'd have seen."

"That's the whole game, Em," Jess went on. "I know it well. Trust me." She made a sound that made it clear she was aggravated at this Jake for hurting her friend. "Want me to come over? I know it's late, but you could use some company and I'm up now anyway."

Emma nodded, "Yes, please," she answered, her voice shaky. She curled up under the blanket she'd gotten out and was already dressed in a pair of pajama pants and a sweatshirt. Her body had been showered, the scent of Jake washed away. But the marks he'd made on her body remained. And those kisses, those touches.

Emma could never forget Jake, didn't want to forget. Why did he have to leave?

"All righty. I'll be there in fifteen," Jess said and she hung up the phone.

Jake made the entire walk home with his eyes cast down at the ground. The wind had picked up and there was a biting chill in the air, causing his ears to tingle and turn a deep shade of crimson. His hands were tucked in his jacket pockets and he took long, purposeful strides, wanting to get out of the cold and into the privacy of his home.

Despite the spectacle he'd just put himself through, Jake was mulling over actually turning back and returning to Emma. His decision had been one made in haste and the longer he thought about what he'd done, the worse he felt about it. Emma had essentially given him everything he could have ever wanted out of a night together. Her only reservations had been to his knife and even then she was more receptive than he could have hoped. Had he just made a decision that would jeopardize the future of their relationship?

When he finally reached his building, Jake ascended the stairs to the third floor, tugged his keys from his pocket and unlocked his door. He sighed as the rush of warm air from his apartment hit him in the face and proceeded to shrug off his jacket, hanging it up in the small closet adjacent the front door. He kicked off his boots in the same methodical fashion that had been tradition, lining them up in a neat row along with the rest of his shoes before retiring to his bedroom.

Jake undressed down to his boxers, setting his knife down on his nightstand in its usual resting place. He settled onto his bed and turned on his side, studying the knife, trying to clear his mind completely. It was a fruitless endeavor. Bringing a hand in front of his face, Jake inhaled deeply. He could still smell the lingering scent of Emma on his fingers. He breathed in deeper, relishing in the scent. He could have still been there beside her, reveling in the glow of her body. Instead, he was painfully alone.

Knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep, Jake got up and fetched his laptop from the desk in his room. He unplugged it from the charger and carried it back to his bed. He lay on his back with his legs bent at the knee, setting the laptop down on his stomach. He quickly headed for Emma's blog, curious to see if there was going to be any quick posting or hint at what had just happened. Would she give him up? Would she mention how some psychopath with a knife had wanted to cut her up? As he thought longer and harder about it, his palms began to sweat and his fingers nervously played over the keys, not actually typing anything.

What had he gotten himself into? He'd divulged way too much way too soon. No one alive knew his secret and yet Emma knew one very crucial detail. He'd spared her, but it made more sense to kill her and start anew. He loved her as much as he was humanly capable of, but if he didn't mend fences, she was bound to tell someone.

Signing on to her blog, Jake opened up the private messages section and clicked on Emma's name. He stared at the blank box for ages it seemed before he finally started to type:

Emma,

Tonight was magical. I've never shared a night with someone who I've felt so connected to. So bound to. You made me feel things I didn't think I was capable of feeling. I've always been someone who shies away from emotion. I distance myself from things that make me feel, because as you witnessed tonight, I don't know how to handle myself.

I'm not some Prince Charming to sweep you off of your feet and give you the white picket fence and the cozy house full of children. I'm not the guy who's going to surprise you with flowers or massage your feet after you've had a long day.

There are so many things about me you don't know. I want so desperately to let someone in on them...let YOU in on them, because if there's one person in this world who might understand, it's you. But I find myself at odds with the thought of actually doing it. And with the scene I caused tonight, it might be best I keep my distance.

Forgive me for tonight. I didn't mean to hurt you in any way, but I'm afraid the look I caught in your eyes as I turned to leave told otherwise and it's stabbed at me since. I have to go. I can't sleep, but I can think some more.

Maybe we can see each other again. Maybe.

--J

Emma didn't even have the desire to bother making tea and no doubt Jess would be expecting it given the state she was certain in. But she just couldn't bring herself to do it though the idea definitely appealed. Sighing, sniffling, she brought the blanket tighter about her shoulders. Tea typically comforted her, made her feel easier. But she was sure nothing could settle her emotions after what had just happened. She felt stupid, foolish, like someone who'd just been played. Ugh, she'd been so caught up in everything in...Jake.

Oh, Jake had been so absolutely perfect! His face, his eyes, the way he smiled. Emma remembered the way he'd looked at her. No man had ever looked at her in that way before. Not even past boyfriends. As if her list was long...a tiny smile tugged at the corner of her lips for a brief moment only to be quickly replaced by a frown. Images of Jake swirled in her head. It was as if she could feel his dark gaze upon her body. So much heat and fire. She shivered at the memory, now a cold and distant dream. A tear dripped down along her cheek and she angrily wiped it away.

If only she hadn't gotten lost in the moment, so carried away. She was hardly a heroine from one of her novels even if Jake fit the description of her heroes.

Just then, Emma heard the call button go off. Sniffling softly, she stood up with her blanket and went over to her door. She pushed the button and within minutes, Jess was inside and sitting beside her on the couch. The brunette hadn't bothered getting dressed, donning a pretty flannel pajama set that Emma envied.

"So, are you all right?" Jess asked, reaching out and taking Emma's hand in her own.

Emma just shook her head. "Yeah...no...oh, I don't know."

Jess just frowned and glanced around. "No tea?" she asked and then smiled. "I can make you some."

"No, no. I don't want any," Emma sighed as she curled up on the couch and pulled the blanket over her body.

"Emma, that's not like you," Jess scolded. At that, she marched over to the kitchenette and began preparing the tea kettle. "It'll be a minute. Have a kind you're craving?"

Emma shrugged, her eyes fluttering shut.

"Don't you fall asleep on me now. You need to talk to me. Okay?" Jess complained. She then rummaged through a cabinet and pulled out white peach infused green tea. Smiling and nodding, she set up some mugs with the tea bags. Once the tea was ready, she went back over to her friend. "So, tell me about this asshole?"

Emma groaned. "That's just it," she went on. "He wasn't an asshole. Just..."

"Not an asshole? He left you! He fucked you..." Emma winced at Jess' choice of words. "And left you high and dry. Sorry, Em, but he's a dick."

Emma cringed, her skin crawling. This night was turning out like she'd imagined, not after she'd bumped into Jake and things started going so well. It had been a roller coaster ride of emotion and she wasn't sure where it was leading her. "I...I guess, just..."

"Em, I know it's been a while, but seriously, just because a guy knows how to use that thing between his legs doesn't make him a good person." Jess paused and looked at mug in her hands. "Just means he knows how to fuck."

"Jess!" Emma shrieked.

"Well, it's true!"

Emma frowned and sipped her tea. The warm liquid tasted good, the gentle flavors making her feel better, especially with Jess there. "I suppose so. I think I want to check my blog."

"At this hour?" Jess whined. "Why?"

"It'll make me feel better, occupy my head. Oh, I don't know. Humor me," Emma begged before taking another sip of tea.

"Fine," Jess conceded and she followed Emma into her bedroom.

Emma couldn't even look at her bed. All she could think about were the things she and Jake had done on it, the things she still wanted to do. It was mortifying that she was reluctant to let him go. But he'd left her. She had to move on even if she didn't want to. Taking a deep breath, she opened up her blog and saw a blinking alert that she had a message.

"So many fans," Jess teased as she nudged Emma.

Emma just snorted and opened the message and began to read it, Jess standing there over her shoulder.

"What an asshole way to apologize. Can't even be a man about it and do it in person," Jess harrumphed.

But Emma just sat there, her body frozen in her seat as she stared at the screen. Just what was Jake trying to say? Didn't he trust her? She'd trusted him...she wanted him...she... Fresh tears fell along her cheeks and she began to shake.

"Shit," Jess rasped as she leaned down and hugged Emma tightly. "It's not you. This is all him, all right?" She rubbed Emma's back and smoothed down her mussed blonde hair. "Just let him go. Hey, isn't there some new guy that started working at the library?"

Emma's body stiffened. She didn't like where Jess was going. Her friend meant well, but she didn't like this. Not one bit. "What about him?"

"I've seen him eye you a time or two when I've stopped by. Why not try your luck? Or, since I know you'll never do it, maybe I'll give the guy some encouraging words." Jess gave Emma wink.

"Don't you dare!" Emma shrieked.

Jess just giggled. "That settles it. I'm doing it, whether you like it or not."

Jake didn't feel any better after the message was sent. In fact, he felt it was more an act of desperation and would be seen that way instead of some sentimental, heart felt act. He twisted and turned on his bed with his laptop still out, refreshing the page every thirty seconds to see if she'd responded to him. Nothing. She couldn't have been sleeping. The night they shared together coupled with his untimely exit would mean she was still in shock and most likely was as uncomfortable as him. She could have gone out, but he didn't see Emma as that type.

After what felt like an hour with no response, Jake finally resigned himself to closing the laptop. He placed it back on his desk and then without any second thought, make his way back out of his apartment and into the cold night. It was even more deserted than it had been earlier in the night when he'd bumped into Emma for the first time. The only sound was the rustling of leaves the wind kicked around and the only light came from the street lamps that sparsely lined the road.

Jake walked the same path he had from Emma's apartment, unsure of what his plan of action even was. Would he dare go back and apologize for his rash decision to leave? Should he divulge everything it was he was hiding from her and gauge her reaction? If she knew and she took it well, they could have had a chance. If she was disgusted or the slightest bit terrified by it, he would have to kill her, but at least he had that one night to think about for the rest of his life.

"What are you going to do, Jake?" he kept asking himself as he finally reached her apartment. He grabbed hold of the front door and was preparing to open it when he thought better of it. Instead, he jogged across the street and nestled himself in the same row of hedges that spanned the area behind the bus stop. He was quite familiar with the surroundings as they had been where he stalked Emma on a nightly basis ever since he learned where she lived.

He had a perfect view of the front of her building and would see anyone entering or leaving, although unless they were Emma herself, he wouldn't know for sure if anyone was actually there having visited her. It wasn't an ideal situation and Jake would have preferred to actually be inside the apartment, but he stood a bigger risk of being caught that way. There in the hedges near the bus stop, his only risk were bums and squirrels.

He would stay there overnight and through the next morning if he had to. He needed to know what Emma's next step was going to be following their night together. He had to be one step ahead of her.

Emma didn't like the look on her friend's face, the way her dark eyes sparkled in the soft light of her bedroom. But she knew Jess all too well. Whenever the girl got something in her head, she just wouldn't let it go. Ever. She'd been that way for as long as she'd known her and most of the time it had served both of them well, kept their friendship strong. Only now, Emma wasn't so sure. Yes, she knew Jess was meaning well, trying to help her get over everything. But it was all too fresh in her head and...as much as she didn't want to admit it...a part of her didn't want to get over Jake. A part of her wanted to hold on to the thought of him, how he'd touched her, looked at her, how he'd even held that knife against her skin and told her he'd wanted to see her bleed.

A shiver ran along Emma's spine just then causing her body to shudder. She smiled weakly at Jess and shook her head. Her thoughts were on Jake, imagining his face as he gripped her hips, palms splayed against her skin as he brought her body achingly close to climax. Biting down on her lower lip, her blue eyes fluttered shut and she sat back and sighed. Jess just snorted. Her friend's mind had been made up and there would be no deterring her. The only way Jess would let things drop regarding the new guy at the library would be for her to suck it up and go on an obligatory date with him despite her conflicted feelings. If only there was a way for her to make Jess understand.

But there wasn't. Jess would scold her if she knew what was going through her head, be infuriated if she knew that gift she'd given her had been touched by Jake's hands. Ugh! Perhaps a failed date with 'library guy' would be enough? Emma was certain it would be. It would have to be. No one would ever live up to Jake. Not now, not ever. Not when she now knew how things could be, should be...just...

Why did he have to ruin it? Why did he have to leave?

Emma's tummy twisted again at the notion of even bothering with the new guy at the library. It would be wrong to even give him hope of anything when she knew there was none. But what could she do? Jess would surely talk to him and then...oh, what a mess!

"Don't worry," Jess said confidently, breaking the chaos of Emma's thoughts. "I'll talk to him. You won't have to do a thing."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Emma sighed.

The night wore on and the two girls sipped tea and chatted about old times. Emma decided it best to discuss other things that had nothing to do with men. When the sky was beginning to brighten, Jess glanced at the window and scowled. Fortunately, she had the day off and wouldn't have to work until later on in the evening.

"Well, I'd better get going," Jess said as she moved to get up and bring her mug to the kitchen sink. "I've got work later this evening and you've got to be at the library in...what...a couple hours?"

Emma groaned and nodded. She'd barely slept and would have to face work. Originally, she'd been hoping to call in sick, but now she really had no excuse. Staying home seemed a terrible idea. All she'd end up doing was wallowing in self-pity. She needed to get out, to occupy her mind. Though she really wasn't looking forward to seeing the new guy at work. She could only hope that Jess didn't text him or stop by later on trying to set them up. It was a useless hope. She'd have to play her 'part' just to ease her friend's mind. But it wouldn't mean anything. Ugh, she just hoped it wouldn't make work awkward. That was the last thing she needed.

Jess slipped on her shoes and her jacket. After giving Emma a hug, she opened her door and headed outside. Emma waved from the door.