Genders and request threads

Before now I've used roleplaying sites which split request threads into hetero male, hetero female, and anything else was put into the 'gay / bisexual / other' section, which to be honest I never really liked since it lumped a diverse group of people together just because they didn't fit into the norm.

I much prefer the system here, but I've been having a bit of a problem with it. A lot of the time I'll read a thread and think, wow, that's great! I message the person, only to have them message me back and say "Actually I was only looking for MxF pairings" or "only MxM interests me" or just generally something along those lines.

The boards here don't place you in a category which tells people what kind of pairings you're looking for, only what you'd like to play as. So, can I suggest that people who are looking for a certain gender or have things that they don't enjoy, actually write that on your threads?!? We can't read minds!

Most people do - Like my request specifically states I won't do MxM - Anything else is fair game.

The Mods can't force people to put what they're seeking by way of pairings, though, that would be micro managing and I'm sure they pride themselves on not doing that.

Tess gives good advice,

I will have to make sure my own posts are clear.

This advice is hella sound and is something we've been encouraging for like forever. Thing is, we definitely don't want to lump people here and there if we can help it based on pairing preferences...MUCH easier to do it based on how you want to write. And shit, if that means you like to write in a bunch of ways, meaning you have more than one request thread...so be it! Means you have more options and fancies to be tickled. XD That said, it's very true that if you want to best advertise yourself and NOT waste your own time as well as others, you'll kind of give a clue as to what you're looking for. One clue is the pairing you want to write. I mean, we all will get it that you want to write as a female if the request thread is in the female request section and it won't matter what your genitals are or anything else. End. So, for sure. Try to be thorough when creating your request threads. And be sure to read them and see if someone has any before you up and contact a person for RP. XD

You know what? I'm going to sticky this because it's worthy of the sticky. : )

Well I'm glad that you thought the suggestion was useful! Though sith, I think you misinterpreted. Nobody was suggesting that mods enforce this, it was advice for people to make sure this information is available on their threads, nothing more.

some people state it I don't do mxm unless me or you will be turned female,

It's definitely worth it because this has come up time and again, just as it has that people don't seem to get it that you use the request sections as a means to advertise what you're writing as....not necessarily what you are personally. Because some people genuinely like to write outside of their gender and then some people just identify as both and thus like to write as both...you have a slew of things and reasons behind them and thus to keep it simple: request what you're writing, NOT what you are (even if it turns out to be one in the same). This is why we have THREE basic request sections--namely, the standard male and female and other. Other is for all other categories that don't fit the standard, but NOT for pairing, rather for what you plan to write as. So, if you want to write as a futa, really, the best section to post your request in is 'other' whether you yourself are male, female, trans, makes no difference. Same can be said if you are writing for some crazy alien beastie that is as inhuman as it gets...'other' would work for that too. XD

I have to say, I'm kinda digging this thread and I'm glad it came to be. I hope a lot of people read it. <.<

XD

darkangel76 said:

It's definitely worth it because this has come up time and again, just as it has that people don't seem to get it that you use the request sections as a means to advertise what you're writing as....not necessarily what you are personally. Because some people genuinely like to write outside of their gender and then some people just identify as both and thus like to write as both...you have a slew of things and reasons behind them and thus to keep it simple: request what you're writing, NOT what you are (even if it turns out to be one in the same). This is why we have THREE basic request sections--namely, the standard male and female and other. Other is for all other categories that don't fit the standard, but NOT for pairing, rather for what you plan to write as. So, if you want to write as a futa, really, the best section to post your request in is 'other' whether you yourself are male, female, trans, makes no difference. Same can be said if you are writing for some crazy alien beastie that is as inhuman as it gets...'other' would work for that too. XD

I have to say, I'm kinda digging this thread and I'm glad it came to be. I hope a lot of people read it. <.<

XD

Click to expand...

I thought the request sections were for what you are .. because I can write as male or female, but I post my request in "Roleplay Requests by Male" because I am male.

Nope. Has nothing to do with your own gender, but the characters you wish to write. So, if you want to write females, feel free to write a second request thread and post it on up in females. Plenty of people do that. Sure, you might have some people who have issues regarding 'the who' behind the screen...but it's actually more of a rarity than you might realize. Most won't actually care while others simply won't inquire (kind of a "what I don't know...." scenario, I suppose). However, if someone does care, best to just leave them alone. But yeah, you can certainly go ahead. Expand those creative limits! : )

I'm ambivalent to the op, myself being pan and pretty much open to anything(minus pedo or scat/vomit) so my compatability issues have always been on the personal level never on the kink or pairing.

Aside from the fact that the req threads forums have in bold caps lock "these designations apply to roleplay personas not players genders" and they have for a while, it's role playing and the assumption is that you will not be playing yourself. So I don't understand people applying it to their real world selves.

Yeah, I'm the same, Quin. I don't care who writes opposite me. I do care about the pairings--much as I state in my request thread that I only write mxf--but I don't care who writes my males so long as they help me write a wonderful story. XD I've written with men, women, transgendered...basically, people of all kinds and of all sexualities and it's been a fabulous experience and I wouldn't change it. Not ever. Like you, it's about the chemistry I have with the writer and that goes beyond the gender you actually are. : )

You're kind of missing the point I think Quin, unless you consider yourself ambivalent to having your time wasted. It's all very well and good that you're open to all gender pairings, but not everyone else is, and I assume you actually write this on your thread so people know that they can suggest whatever they like. Some people who do have these preferences just don't think to write them on their threads, so people will messages them asking for things they don't want due to the absence of a single sentence or even just something like (MxF, MxM) in their thread title.

For example a request thread might say "I want to play the younger partner in a BDSM relationship between a zookeeper and someone who owns a lemon farm, I would like to be the submissive, and have a fetish for lemon juice". - granted the scenario itself is unlikely, but a lot of people write gender-neutral posts (which is fine) but then don't then give any hint of what kind of gender pairings they like to roleplay about despite having certain things they do and don't like. All that means is that someone who is only into MxM might end up getting a bunch of MxF requests, or vice versa.

My OP had absolute zip to do with real world gender by the way, some of you seem to be reading into it that way. The only point that I made was that if you're not interested in certain genders of character, or only looking for certain ones, say so.

I hear you, Tess (is it ok if I call you that?). I think the main thing people should state....and do so in their request thread titles regardless of the where in which they decide to post since it just makes it that much easier for people to sift through (though this wouldn't be a requirement, merely just something to make things easier for all. I mean, come on, who wants to sift through a bunch of threads, click one and be either like: I'm still unsure OR oh, this isn't my kind of pairing...though the latter is DEFINITELY better than the former). But anyway, I'm long winded as hell, lol! If you put the pairing you want in your title, you save yourself and others a lot of time and aggravation. : )

I am attempting something new that Might help with that on my RT, where I will post a roleplaying characteristic, and then a number of different symbols next to each characteristic. Its not perfect, and there are some redundancies and overlap, but for the most part it gets the message across.

Perhaps its micromanagement, but micromanagement is not always a bad thing. (Call me OCD, I like shit to be organized!!!)


Legend:

❤❤❤Craving to play a certain characteristic❤❤❤(Hearts):

❤❤❤❤❤ I very much enjoy playing this characteristic
❤❤❤❤ I generally enjoy this characteristic
❤❤❤ I am indifferent to playing this characteristic
❤❤ I have little desire to play this characteristic
❤ I have no desire to play this characteristic

☠☠☠Experience playing this characteristic☠☠☠(Skull and crossbones):
(This accounts for all of my 29 years of roleplaying, not just BMR)
☠☠☠☠☠ I have played this role 10+ times
☠☠☠☠ I have played this role 6 to 9 times
☠☠☠ I have Played this role 3 to 5 times
☠☠ I have played this role once or twice
☠ I have not played this role before

★★★Performance playing this characteristic★★★(Stars):

★★★★★ My partners very much enjoy my performance
★★★★ My partners generally enjoy my performance
★★★ I have gotten a few minor validated complaints on my performance
★★ I have gotten a few major validated complaints, and need more practice
★ I have gotten many validated complaints, and your patience will be appreciated as I struggle to improve


I have everything broken down into 7 groups,(Genre, D/s Orientation, Race, Sexual Orientation, Gender, Profession, and Moral Alignment) which can usually be mixed and matched into whatever. I am entertaining ideas of adding an 8th "Pairing" group thanks to this discussion...
Examples:

Sample Profession:
Mercenary: ❤❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠☠★★★★★

Sample Sexual Orientation:
Homosexual (Female):❤❤❤☠☠★★(Said that my character was acting overly flirtatious)

Sample Race:
Infernals(Demons, Devils, etc) ❤❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠☠★★★★

The system is still brand new but so far It has solved a lot of problems for me. Hope that helps

To be honest pazzo that seems quite a complex system, it seems that you're trying to ascribe a mathematic solution to something when simply writing a single sentence like "I've not tried this type of RP before, but I'm greatly craving it" would suffice just fine.

p.s. micromanagement is not the same as paying attention to fine detail yourself, micromanagement is when someone else, typically a boss or administrator, is constantly looking over your shoulder and telling you to change things.

I enjoy colorful threads. Pazzo's thread makes me smile. And I get his intention even if I couldn't quite pull it off myself.

(Jolie gets *hugs*)

*shrugs* Yes Tessylyn, I understand my methods are not for everyone.

I did try to keep it as simple as possible, 3 ratings of values 1 to 5 each.
The prototype had 7 ratings with values of 1 to 10.
I have to have quantitative values instead of words, for whatever reason I understand numbers better, its just the way my brain is wired. This is the best way for me to present things accurately as I understand them.

And understood on the PS concerning Micromanaging

Rudolph Quin said:

I'm ambivalent to the op......I'm pan............

Click to expand...

Tessylyn said:

You're kind of missing the point I think Quin, unless you consider yourself ambivalent to having your time wasted. *snip*

Click to expand...

:huh:

I was stating an opinion and my personal experience, as, you know, this was a discussion topic called upon for people to participate in the announcements. So, I did. There's how things are for me. No, it's not time wasted for me since I'll write as anybody and do anybody and you're complaining about not knowing someone's intended pairings when detailing a plot. It's not a problem for ME.

As for the real life thing being mentioned that was brought up in the course of the conversation and I was adding my two scents about that as well. Conversations do that. They grow and develop and this just happens to involve some of the very same or similar issues of what pairings people prefer because they care about not only the MxM of their rp but also the genitalia of their partners in the real world. See? Related. Discussion.

Alright, updated with parings. It might look a little complex, but its the simplest way My mind can present a solution to your question about how to communicate pairings/desires/etc,

ROLEPLAYING CHARACTERISTICS
Erotic Pairings(Under Construction)
Me x You
(You can intermix any of the Race characteristics here with these, such as Human-Male x Anthromorph-Female)
Male x Female ❤❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠☠ ★★★★
Female x Female ❤❤❤❤ ☠☠ ★★★★
Male x Male ❤☠
Female x Male ❤❤❤❤ ☠☠ ★★★★
Hermaphrodite x Male ❤☠
Hermaphrodite x Female ❤❤❤❤ ☠
Male x Hermaphrodite ❤❤☠
Female x Hermaphrodite ❤❤☠
Hermaphrodite x Hermaphrodite ❤❤☠

Race
Human: ❤❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠☠★★★★
Humanoid(Dwarves, Elves, etc): ❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠☠★★★★
Anthromorphic(Furries): ❤❤❤☠☠★★★★
Monster(Werewolves, trolls, dragons, etc): ❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠★★★★
Divinities(Gods, Demigods, Angels, etc): ❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠★★(Too preoccupied with doing things that did not fit the scope of the story)
Infernals(Demons, Devils, etc) ❤❤❤❤❤☠☠☠☠☠★★★★

Both points are good ones and it was me who sort of led discussion that way because of exactly what Quin pointed out. Both go hand in hand and come up a lot. Thus it is good this topic came up for everyone to discuss. It is all good stuff. : )

If I am reading this right, the main idea here is:
"Go easy on your prospective RP-partner and accurately communicate/present your desired pairings in an easily understandable way, and encourage them to ask questions if they don't understand."

I haven't looked into too many RT's but several didn't have a pairings preference so I wasn't sure what to really message them about so I ended up not messaging them at all.

And, I personally hate managing several different threads. I'll play as male, female, shemale or something gender fluid as such, I just put my RT in female [as I'm a female] and just stated in the thread I'll play the different roles and what pairings I do like.

But, this is something more people should read. I've known people who will bitch with "He messaged me wanting fxf I don't even like that." and come to find out they don't even mention that they dislike it nor what they DO like so its just...I dunno. As DA mentioned before its something people should take into consideration and do. It would save time on both sides if they added that simple thing. Not to mention a lot of trouble and misunderstandings.

But yeah. My RT might come off as a bit haughty? Or elitist in nature but its not intentional. Mostly it comes across that way because of the different people I've dealt with. But, yeah. Again. Pairings/likes/dislikes all that is pretty important information to have in a RT.

And Quin is right on that. Some people just play themselves in the RP and the gender of their partner is what they care about, not their partners characters and the like. I think its unimportant and silly to focus on that...but its a preference. I've known people like this so in this particular discussion it is a relevant point.

P.S.
If something in here doesn't make sense or whatever, I apologize. I'm a little stoned. I'll look over it later when I'm not. So just...bear with me on this for now.