Surviving in Shadows [Saria & CharlotteV]

Lucas slung his arm around Max's shoulders when he shifted closer. Just because Kithiel hadn't killed them didn't necessarily mean he could be trusted... If they could learn what they could about magic and how... not to die by using it, or losing themselves... He rubbed at his neck with a grimace. And how to get rid of this anchor or whatever.

"It'll be strange having someone else with us."

Kithiel swam back to the surface with two fish in his mouth, dumping them on the bank. He glanced between the two, deciding not to mention he could pick up on Lucas' thoughts with the mark. Even if he couldn't, he didn't expect them to trust him with what they'd gone through. He shook himself, spraying them both with water before turning and disappearing back under the water to get a few more fish.

Lucas ground his teeth and wiped water off his face. "And annoying..."

Max snorted out a bit of a laugh, a quick shiver running through his body at the slight sprinkle of cold water. "This is why I never wanted a dog," he muttered jokingly, but he had to admit...the sight of fish for dinner was more appeasing than the entire mystery that was the white wolf.

The teenager sighed, turned a bit more into his brother, pressed his face to the spot where Lucas' neck met his shoulder, just breathed for a second, surrounded by warmth, safety, and everything in this world he could count on. He never wanted to move. He just...wanted to stay there and forget the world.

Eventually he did, just enough to rest more comfortably. "What do you think it all means? Him, being here. Whatever the hell a 'tether' is..."

Lucas shivered at the warm breath on his neck, subconsciously moving his fingers through the ends of Max's hair. He felt his body responding and tried to think of how much danger they were in or could be in, but the danger and constant fear had long since become so commonplace it was hard to get worked up over it until the hounds were howling in the distance.

"Fuck if I know," he muttered, not about to admit to being distracted. Curse his sensitive neck anyway.

"I feel...lighter though..." he added quietly. "Like the weight of it all isn't so heavy anymore." He almost felt like he could use the powers without... risking his sanity, though he wasn't about to try it, sure it was some kind of trap.

If Max could have anything he wanted, any wish in the world...it would be answers. Simple, truthful, explanations to everything. The fingers moving through his hair were relaxing, but they didn't stop his mind from spinning. He wanted to know things...he wanted to understand. How the hell did the people in the cities do it? They had so much power...so much magic...nothing holding them back. Sure, they were insane bastards, but how did they manage without killing themselves accidentally?

He listened to Lucas talk, fingers playing absently with the edge of his brothers shirt while he thought. "Is it better?" he asked after a moment. "Having him here instead of your dreams?"

Because Max didn't like it...didn't like what it could mean...but, at the same time, if he could get rid of the nightmares, things might be better.

Lucas gave a small shrug of his shoulders. "I don't know. It's like a waking dream now. I slept better than I ever have last night." He wasn't sure if that meant the nightmares were over or if they'd be coming at them for real now. "Maybe we should get some answers from him." Hopefully the wolf could be trusted.

Kithiel swam back to the surface with another two fish, dropping them by the others before stepping out of the water completely and shaking himself dry. There was a pulse of magic and heat, his fur puffing briefly as it dried and settled back into place. If you're not going to cook these, I'll eat them for you.

Lucas glared at the wolf as he wiped water off his face again. "We'll cook them." He picked one up and tossed it at Max. "Remember how to clean one?"

Walking dream. Max winced because he certainly didn't like the sound of that. But Lucas had a point...the wolf was the closest thing they had to getting any answers. He surely knew more than they did, at least. And, as of yet, they had no reason not to trust him. Except...generally, they couldn't trust anyone but each other.

He made a sound of irritation in the back of his throat when Kithiel resurfaced, breaking his state of calm and warmth at the same time. He pulled his shirt up to wipe off his face and nodded before sitting criss-cross and digging his pocket knife out of his back pocket. "Yeah, I remember." He'd never been particularly good at it, but he could get the job done.

As a kid, cleaning fish had been his least favorite thing in the world. Too much blood. He'd grown out of that. He'd grown out of a lot things.

Lucas pulled out his own knife out of his boot and set to work on the other fish. He slanted a look at the wolf as he gutted the fish with a faint grimace. "Are you going to tell us what's really going on?"

Kithiel sat next to them with a flick of his ears. What do you mean?

"I mean if you're going to be sticking with us, why don't you explain some things about what's going on?"

What do you want to know?

Lucas glanced at Max and was almost afraid to ask anything about magic, but... they had to know. They couldn't keep living their lives in fear of their powers if there was a small chance they didn't have to. "Magic..." he said quietly, finishing one fish and rinsing it off in the water. "How dangerous is it really?"

The fact of the matter was, despite the world they lived in, they didn't...actually know a lot about magic. There were the horror stories, the kind that went through the grapevine. People with magic are dangerous, people with magic have no souls, people with magic will suck you dry. Hell, the neighborhood kids even had games equivalent to witch trials they played.

Magic was bad news, end of story.

And they had it.

But one thing had always remained a fact - people with magic lost themselves. Like, it ate away at personalities or mentality or something. The new being that came from it was power hunger and driven and...that was what they were so afraid of.

Max felt the warmth through his veins, felt the numbness at the edge of his fingertips, and he wanted it so bad...he wanted to give in. But everytime he looked at Lucas, he shut it down. Because he wanted his brother more.

Maybe even in ways he wasn't quite ready to admit.

"Can it really kill us?"

Kithiel looked between the two of them as he considered how to answer. He'd been following them long enough, watched them often enough, he knew how little they knew about their powers, and how much they distrusted it and others. Considering the state of their world, it wasn't surprising. It always has the potential of being ...dangerous. Or killing you, but not in the way you think... He sighed softly and tapped his tail against the ground. Magic is a tool. Like your blade, you can use it to kill or protect, and if used wrong you can hurt yourself. Having a tether can help your control of it...or not. There were others of his kind who spent their lives feasting on humans and their magic, but he wasn't interested in such things.

"What do you mean or not..?" Lucas asked, voice tight as he looked at the wolf.

Kithiel hesitated and glanced at Max, ears laying flat a moment. He could sense a darker pull to the boy's magic and knew how dangerous or volatile he could end up being. And the types who would want him as their anchor. Not all of my realm can be trusted, he finally said, ignoring Lucas' muttered "No shit."

"Know your limits," Max muttered to himself. It was something his mother had told him, so many times growing up. When Max jumped off the roof and broke his leg when he was five, he hadn't even got lectured, his mother had just shook his head and told him know your limits, Maxwell. When he was eleven and he had tried to fight Carl Marks for stealing his comic book (because they were rare as shit) and he'd come home with a black eye...know your limits. Before she'd died...and he'd tried so hard...know your limits.

It was the same with magic. One had a certain amount of it, and a limit. Breaking that limit could kill them or worse or...

Max tuned back into the conversation once he felt eyes on him, glanced up slowly to meet the wolves yellow gaze. The words rang too true, echoing through his brain, causing the warm pulse of magic below his skin to go cold. He shook his head, walked to the edge of the water to clean his hands off and move to the next fish.

"Too bad it's not easy knowing who you can trust...and who you can't."

What are your instincts telling you? Kithiel asked, studying Max. He hoped the boy would fight against the darker part of his magic. It was a shame Lucas was stuck with a brother who could cause so much trouble, but he was sure asking Lucas to abandon him would only end in one of them dying or worse.

Lucas finished with the second fish and found a stick to put them on, eyeing his brother. Max had always seemed far more...scared of his magic than Lucas ever was, but also wanted to use it more. His instincts said he could trust Kithiel, but he couldn't be sure that didn't have something to do with the mark on his neck. Trusting others was...suicide.

Max was silent for awhile, so silent it didn't seem like he would answer the question at all. His focus on cleaning the fish was what gave him away though, he was too locked in, too precise, in a way that he never was. He was obviously thinking. Or avoiding.

What were his instincts telling him?

Give in.

Stop fighting.

You could have anything you ever wanted.

Trust no one.

Ever.

"I don't know," Max muttered, finally. It wasn't really an answer, but he didn't really want to talk about it either. He didn't want to admit that if anything ever happened to Lucas...he'd probably let go. Fade somewhere into the shadows, push his limits, let it either kill him or consume him. He didn't want to admit that he kind of wanted to anyway.

Max grabbed a stick, focused on putting the fish on it, ran his knuckles across the back of his neck. Suddenly, he didn't want to talk about any of this anymore.

Lucas tensed as he noticed how focused Max was on his fish cleaning, reaching over to rest his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Max," he murmured, not sure if he should press the issue or not. Maybe he shouldn't have let them avoid the topic for so long, it just made it harder to talk about it now, when they had someone who could actually answer their questions.

The one who calls to you in your dreams.... There is one, isn't there? Why haven't you let them anchor to you yet? Kithiel sensed Lucas' reluctance to make Max answer, but it was dangerous not knowing. He ignored Lucas' glare as he watched Max, fur rippling as he waited for any shift in his magic.

Max stiffened a bit at the feeling of Lucas' hand on his shoulder. Usually, he was comforted by touch, but not when he was avoiding things. There was something about someone touching him that made him feel like he couldn't lie...like he had to stay in the present and not get lost in his own thoughts.

He got the fish ready, sat them aside, and then realized he should have worked on them longer because now there was nothing to occupy his hands.

The one who calls to you in your dreams... Max's heart speeds up, sweat breaks out along his spine, chills cover his arms. Anxiety. Like he's never felt before, not while he's awake. There is one, isn't there? The little kid, back facing him, knobby shoulders. Why haven't you let them anchor to you yet?.

Bad.

Go back.

Wrong.

And then something new. Anger. The feeling coursed through him as powerfully as his magic always did, lighting him up like a flame took to a match, and Max hated all of it.

He reached up, grabbing Lucas' hand on his shoulder, before twisting himself completely into his brother, burying his face into the man's chest. His heart was still beating too hard. He didn't wan to answer. He didn't, he didn't, he didn't.

He didn't even realize he was crying until he felt the wet cotton against his cheeks.

Lucas blinked as Max threw himself against his chest, dropping his stick of fish and wrapping his arms around his brother. "Max?" Oh shit. He was...crying? Max never cried, at least not when he thought no one could see or hear him. Damn wolf! He tightened his arms around Max, gently ruffling his hair.

Stop coddling him.

Lucas gritted his teeth and glared at Kithiel. "Stop talking about anchors and tethers," he snapped. "Why does it matter who he sees in his dreams?"

Kithiel flattened his ears, fur rippling as he sensed the anger and turmoil surrounding Max. Those who would be drawn to your brother are dangerous. I can't help him if I don't know who's trying to anchor to him.

"What do you mean drawn to him? Is that how you marked me? You were drawn to me?" Lucas growled and felt his own anger rising. Kithiel had found him like a dog sniffing out a sucker to take him in?

Kithiel's fur bristled. Yes. Your magic called to me. Just as his magic calls to the darker inhabitants of my realm... He stepped closer with a soft growl. He's a danger, even to you.

Max couldn't remember the last time he'd cried more than one loose tear. He hadn't cried the day he'd broken his leg. Hadn't cried the day he saw a kid his age get shot when he lit something on fire accidentally. Hadn't cried when they figured out they had the stupid magic gene either. He'd cried the day their mother died...two tears, that was all. Max wasn't a crier...he was a screamer, hitter, biter (once). But not a crier.

Definitely not when people could see him. For christ sake, he had more pride than that.

Those who would be drawn to your brother are dangerous. No if's or but's about it. Flat out. Simple. Anything drawn to Max was dangerous. in the shadows, in his dreams...

If possible, Max started hating this conversation ever more, the words said around him spinning through his mind. Drawn. He didn't like that word. It was like...a cat ripping into a toy for the catnip...or a wolf searching for a bone. Something.

Just as his magic calls to the darker inhabitants of my realm.

Whoop, there it was.

But it was the next three words that set Max off. His hands curled into fists and then he tore himself out of Lucas grip, eyes narrowing on the wolf in front of him. "I'm not a danger to anyone." His skin felt like it was on fire, speeding towards his hands, and then the magic just erupted, like a livewire, shooting from his fingertips. "FUCK!"

"God." Max was on his feet in seconds, holding both hands close to his chest. He could feel the blood even before he unclasped his hands, staring down at the new, fresh lines across his palms, like he'd held onto a firecracker or something. "Don't follow me," he snapped over his shoulder, more to Kithiel than Lucas, before taking off.

He didn't go far, mostly because he was too busy using his elbows to rub at the tears against his cheeks, and because his hands hurt like a motherfucker, before dropping to his knees and dipping his hands into the cold water. That hurt too, but it was better than the burning feeling.

"Max-" Lucas felt the prickle at the back of his a moment before the area around them was bathed in heat and fire. He threw his hands up to shield himself though he knew it wouldn't be enough. The fire was hot and fierce and he felt it burning away the oxygen, but... not him. Brief as it lasted, he still expected to find singed hair and skin, but even his clothes seemed untouched. It wasn't until he felt magic fading from around his body he realised the wolf...protected him.

"Max!" he called again, worry and maybe a touch of fear surging through him. He watched his brother, not following, but only because he knew Max wouldn't go too far. He turned his attention to Kithiel and resisted the urge to kick the wolf. Barely. "What the hell is going on?" he snapped. "What do you want with Max?"

Kithiel stopped the low growling in his throat as he looked at Lucas. I don't want anything from your kin, he said. It was even more true now that he'd seen the boy's magic. Fire was volatile enough on its own, but in the hands of someone like Max... he was even more of a danger than he'd thought. He's dangerous. His powers are only going to grow stronger and harder to control. He could kill both of us with ea-

"I'm not leaving Max," he said, voice flat. He'd been Max's guardian for too long to just abandon him now. They'd both known something like this could happen eventually and he'd always suspected it would be Max who'd.... lose himself first. He'd just never wanted to think about it.

I'm not asking you to. But if he becomes an anchor at this point, you may not have a choice. There were lesser of the evils of his realm, but a young human with magic of fire and chaos in his heart... He didn't want to know who was trying to anchor to the boy.

"I'm. Not. Leaving." Lucas turned to stalk after Max, hesitating a foot away from him before continuing and dropping down to sit next to his brother. "You hurt?"

Max just kind of...collapsed. Sure, he knew he had a decent amount of power, but he'd never flat out lost control like that before. Granted, he'd never been that mad before either. The most he'd ever used his powers had taken concentration...he couldn't even use them when he was scared, half the time.

That fire...that had been emotional, angry, and he hadn't...he hadn't meant to. That was scarier than anything else.

He wiped his eyes off on his shoulders, one at a time, trying to choke back new tears. This was ridiculous. First he couldn't control his magic, now his emotions? What the hell?

"Get a grip, Maxwell," he muttered to himself, turning his hands over slowly under the water. God, they looked bad. He was so lost in thought he didn't even hear Lucas come close, at least until his brother was sitting next to him.

"Um..." Max sniffled, wiping his eyes one more time. "Just a little...I'm fine...uh...I'm sorry...I...I didn't...mean to."

Lucas sighed and rubbed at Max's back. "I know you didn't. You... lost control," he said softly. That wasn't exactly comforting, knowing what his brother was capable of if he got angry. Well... they'd just have to make sure they didn't upset Max before he learned some control. And found out whoever his...tether was.

"Lemme see your hands." He tugged at Max's arm to get a look at how bad the damage was. "How is it you always manage to get all the injuries?" At least they both healed quickly, though hand injuries were the worst, after foot injuries. "Are you feeling calmer now? No more fireworks?"

Max was torn between relaxing into the hand rubbing at his back and shrugging Lucas off. The latter just proved his emotions were still running wild so he took a deep breath - in through his mouth, out through his nose - and forced himself to relax. "I don't even know...why I got so angry..." he admitted, softly, under his breath.

It had been too much. Talking about their magic, spiking his fear, and then implying he was dangerous...and, perhaps, proving that fact. His mind had overridden or something and he'd...found an escape route. A violent one, but still.

He wanted to keep his hands buried under the cold water, but he couldn't fight off Lucas, so he gave in and let his arm get pulled up, opening them obediently to show off the damage to his palms. There were still faded scars from before, now marked over with slashes of red. What wasn't blood was highly irritated skin, but no burns, so that was a plus.

Max chuckled softly, because somehow he always was getting hurt. He could play it off by simply shrugging and using the I'm a boy excuse but...this was different. "No more fireworks," he promised. "Pain is oddly stabilizing."

Lucas smiled faintly and rubbed at Max's wrist before releasing it. "I'll keep that in mind," he said with a teasing smirk. If Max got out of control again, he'd just have to smack him upside the head a bit harder than usual. "Max... we do need to... figure this out... I know your dreams are... more like nightmares, but there has to be some way to keep them from becoming like mine." A talking wolf walking around was bad enough. Whatever Max saw in his dreams to scare him so badly... he wasn't sure they were ready to face that without both of them dying or worse.

Kithiel stopped a few feet away from them, fur bristling as he watched warily for any signs of another attack. Don't let the one in your dreams touch you.

Lucas glared at the wolf. "Is that the only way?"

...It's the only one you'd agree to try.

Max stuck his tongue out at his brother in response, not even thinking about it, which caused a smile to appear on his face because at least that was normal. That was him. But just as soon as he was putting the whole incident behind him, Lucas had to go and be serious again.

He swallowed thickly, eyes dropping down towards his ruined hands. Yeah, his dreams were nightmares, he'd always called them that. They scared the shit out of him.

Kithiel's voice sparked up the anger again, but Max was too tired to let it spark out of control. It just...buzzed, like a warning. His eyes cut over to the white wolf, but he forced himself to remember...he was being helpful. Passive aggressively, but helpful nonetheless. "It won't let me touch him," he admitted. Actually, Max didn't know what the thing in his dream was...it looked like a person, like a boy, but who the hell knew. "Last time I tried, he jerked me out of the dream."

Lucas breathed a small sigh of relief. At least it sounded like Max wouldn't have to worry about being...anchored or bitten or whatever.

He? Kithiel kept his distance, baring his teeth reflexively, expecting the human to set him on fire, or try. He bared his teeth at Lucas when he sensed a desire to kill in his anchor. How had these two survived for so long by denying half their existence? Heal your hands and eat your fish... He turned to dive back into the water to find his own fish.

"Maybe whoever's in your dream isn't trying to mark you..." It was a long shot. Why else would they be tormenting his brother? He sighed and stood. "Let's get your hands wrapped."

Max narrowed his eyes slightly on the wolf an his damn condescending tone, but honestly at this point he was tired. Too damn tired to deal with this mess. And it wasn't helping his nerves any, which probably wasn't a good thing.

"Yeah," he muttered, climbing to his feet easily and cradling his hands against his chest protectively as they moved towards their packs, watching Lucas dig for the first aid supplies.

Honestly, Max wasn't sure what the better option would be. The thing in his dreams...he didn't want it anchored to him. But at the same time...if it wasn't that, then what did it want?

"Why is this our life?" He muttered. "Why couldn't we have just been...normal."

Lucas found the bandages and some burn cream, fixing up Max's hands. "If we were normal, we'd likely be dead by now." Once Max was taken care of he retrieved the fish, rinsing them off in the water and sticking them over the fire to cook.

This whole thing was a mess. "No matter what happens I'm not going to leave you on your own. Even if you end up burning me to a crisp." He sat beside Max while the fish roasted. "We need to get you in control of your temper though."