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Here we go...

BEAUTIFUL DISGRACE IS BACK BABY! BAAAAAAADABIIING, BAADAAAAABOOOOM!

Fuck work, it tires me out. I can't work eight hours a day without dying, I'm pretty sure I need to see a doctor.

But fuck, I feel sooooooo much better now that all my roleplays are responded to. Time to pass out in bed and hope my stomach ache goes away when I sleep instead of getting worse. Thanksgiving...always giving me a stomach ache.
 
Does it make me a bad person if I don't find quotes from any human being even slightly inspiring? Am I self centered or ignorant for that? I mean, sometimes quotes from movies are cool but...I dunno. I never understood the purpose of quoting others. I have too many thoughts myself. Nothing bad with people who do like to live their lives by things others have said.

This is probably why I'm not religious either. I just don't find anything inspiring really..
 
Beautiful Disgrace said:
Does it make me a bad person if I don't find quotes from any human being even slightly inspiring? Am I self centered or ignorant for that?
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Not at all. Different strokes for different folks ;) Okay, I'm quoting there. What I mean is different things interest different people and it would be a boring world if we all liked the same thing. Besides, a clever original thought is almost always more interesting than a redone, cliched quote.

So definitely not bad, self-centered, or ignorant and I firmly say that even if I do enjoy seeing how others put certain ideas, especially if they amuse me as they often do.
 
Well that's good. It just feels like everyone has someone they look up to or whatever. And I'm just here like, "Meh, my words are way more influential than any quote."

Which is why I started questioning my thought process...I feel like that's a bit conceited.
 
Beautiful Disgrace said:
Well that's good. It just feels like everyone has someone they look up to or whatever. And I'm just here like, "Meh, my words are way more influential than any quote."

Which is why I started questioning my thought process...I feel like that's a bit conceited.
Click to expand...

Hey I'm a quoting kind of girl but I can't see you in any sense conceited. Cool, yes. And let's be honest, I probably quote from time to time simply, because I don't have much to say at times. Work can numb me out at times. Which maybe implies that I should be quiet when I don't have anything fresh and original to say, but I'm sadly rarely a quiet girl. I'll stop cluttering up your journal. I just couldn't let you think you're anything less than fresh, original, cool, and awesome and not caring to enter the quote zone doesn't make those facts about you any less true.

Ah, I'm gonna book now. My brother is stopping by my place on his way home. We spent yesterday at my mom's place doing the holiday thing. I've got a .... (enough rambling).
 
Possible disappearance today or tomorrow.

In a lot of pain, have big bright lesion going across my breast. Don't know what it is, just know if it gets any worse I'll be going to the emergency room. If not, I'll be waiting to go to a clinic on Monday to get it check out.

It's been a while since I've felt so much pain in one spot of my body.
 


o_O

Errr ...

If I were you, I'd be going now.

I did have a friend who got breast cancer at 20 years old.

Not to say that's what it is ...

But if you really have no honest to god's idea what that is and it's hurting in a place like that ....

It kinda warrants to get that checked out sooner, not later. I may not be a medical expert or have a degree but going off what Anatomy and Health knowledge I do have, that's my best advice.

Just ... do take care of yourself, no matter what.

Hugs

-Esyel
​
 
My mom told me to go too. If I had insurance I wouldn't be waiting but...

I'll go in a few hours if it continues to get worse...I felt it yesterday before I went to bed, it was just a bump. Then I woke up and it grew, and it's been growing all day too.
 


Ahh, I see, I see.

Yeah, they make it too damn hard to get insurance anywhere nowadays.

Like here, you can only do so if you're disabled somehow. Such bullshit, really.

Is it sad I wish things were back to the way they were in the 90s?

It wasn't perfect, hell no. But definitely much better than now.

Anyway though, do that if needed.

You'll be in my thoughts. I hope nothing but the best for you.

-Esyel
​
 
Ever have a period of time where all you want in a roleplay is sex and violence?

I'm going through one of those times.
 


Not often, no.

But I still have so I can fairly say that I do know what you're talking about.

I think it happens to everyone at least once, where they get an urge or desire to do something(s) they don't typically include in RPs or something they enjoy.

That's what I've noticed at least.

-Esyel
​
 
Mm. I just notice that sometimes I just want to roleplay everything, sometimes I only want to do certain things. It's weird.
 


If I had to take an educated guess, this may be linked to your id.
It really is a fickle thing.
And with how much our brain multi-tasks, you probably don't realize half of what you want.
Not to say you're ignorant, just that with how much we simultaneously work and do things ....
It is very possible that you switch from one want to another without noticing until it seems like the last second.

I admit that this is, in my personal opinion, one of the better reasons I still use AIM or Skype.
For those moments when you go from wanting something more story driven to the opposite or something like that.
It's easier to get a hold of a partner you keep in touch with and at least attempt to negotiate something with them.

But each to their own, I know.

You feeling better by the way?

I hope the pain near your breast went away or at least turned out to be nothing bad.

-Esyel
​
 
Hmm, I know what I want...there are just times where I want something more specific. I'm not very picky when it comes to stories, but sometimes I do have those specific moods.

Oh, and the pain went away. It's still tender but, I think I got bit by something. The redness is almost completely gone.
 
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There's just not enough time in the day anymore. I am getting back into video games and I have 10 roleplays and now I'm drawing again.

Jesus.
 
Going all out as always, I see. Don't burn yourself out, all right? Everyone needs a day off every now and then. ^^
 
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