The Rabblings of a Penguin Persona Madman.

Life seems to just get harder as we roll on or perhaps, we are just at the wrong place at the wrong time? Who knows. Bankruptcy is such a nasty word isn't it? Been hearing it more than not around the house. Getting a job also seems like a common word but, where at? Yea options aren't to diverse. Got Fast food 1 or fast food 2 with a small chance of the wally world out behind.

Death is always a sad that as well. Though do we grieve this death of a hardy little drive. 40 to its name and gigging almost like Quagmire. The dead corpse of it is still in my room. Does it rot? No. It says there with an open wound as I search for a way to either replace or bring it back to life.

Questions? That seems like a new trend eh? Springing to the chance to form in line to question a person who you don't know. It gives me up and down. Now it is rarely asked, for me that is. Curiosity of this stranger just dry? Perhaps so.


Well, keep up the good fight sons and daughters.

*gives snugs* I've been where you are.

*Hugs.* ^ ^

To anyone that reads or gives a tar.

I'm contemplating about leaving fair BMR. It just doesn't seem like now a days I have any reason to stay here. My roleplaying has gotten dull and I haven't been able to find one that didn't feel blah but, not on my parent's account but, my own. Not to mention I barely talk about anything or really to anyone. And to top it off even Chat is starting to feel pointless. So I think for the time being it is better for me to distance myself from here. After all anyone I talk to I am able to talk to on AIM, MSN, or YIM. Though I whole heartedly believe no one will really care, thus why I put this here. Cause it is in fact rabblings and maybe even tl;dr. Though I haven't come to a decision yet since I want to think about it longer. So, to anyone who cares say something, if not oh well.

This is new. What brought this on?

Well, it was from a fight with Aku in chat that led me to this. Made me question why I stay here when I barely do anything here. And if it is worth it to me to stay. Cause yes there are people but, if they really wanted to talk to me then they could just talk to me on Aim,Yim, or Msn. And like I said I don't roleplay really much anymore. Don't get pm's unless it was on accident. So, yea, not much to hold onto here.

PENGGUIN you can't leave! I will miss you. If you want to rp, i would be happy to oblige.

But, you could talk to me on Aim. *Hugs.* As for Rpies I don't think you would. It would be a dud after about page 2 or so. Though that is sweet of you. ^ ^

You still cant leave...

This is some wrist-slashing bullshit. Grow the fuck up and FIX whatever's wrong, don't go mope in a corner, or nothing will improve.

Yea.... I figured that is a response I'd get from you Try. No, it isn't a, "BAWWWWW AKU HURT MY OH POOR FEELINGS! I'M LEAVING BAW!" Nah, this has been something I've been thinking about for a long time. Ever since rpies been drying up for me I've been thinking about it. So, yes Try you can try calling that, "Oh that is BS, stop being a whiney emo-fag and grow up!" But, I want to leave cause I haven't had much fun being here for the past few months. I've tried being a recruiter to get more involved with the site in thinking, "Hey this might make it better." But, that didn't work. I was too worried to just run up to some random place and act like a walking billboard. So, I felt bad about that and guilty. Then when this Welcoming Committee came up I thought it to be a redemption for my shyness to pop up on random sites. That ended up as back because I wanted to be first to greet people like I should but, I end up being the third or fourth person and frankly it defeats the purpose of a greeter when we are suppose to help the person but, it is already covered with other people who get to the gun faster.

MrPenguin said:

Then when this Welcoming Committee came up I thought it to be a redemption for my shyness to pop up on random sites. That ended up as back because I wanted to be first to greet people like I should but, I end up being the third or fourth person and frankly it defeats the purpose of a greeter when we are suppose to help the person but, it is already covered with other people who get to the gun faster.

Click to expand...

It''s not a race to welcome people. It defeats the purpose just as much to have three people on the committee but only one person welcomes for each thread. It is to make newcomers feel like they were noticed(because they are) for being here and to feel like they have a place in our community. The more people who welcome, the better they'll feel, no matter if you offer tips or whatnot "first". Just say "hello", yeah? ^_^

Did you completely miss the part where I said 'Fix what's wrong, don't go mope in a corner or nothing will improve'?

The problems you're having are ENTIRELY caused by your attitude and behavior. They'll follow you.

Try is right....and Pengguin you totaly just told me that about my jobs. *nods*

Ok, anyone reading this please help me. I want people's opinions on if they think why I should stay. Mind you I don't want you saying I should stay cause of BMR diminishing cause if the only reason people want me to stay is cause of me being a statistic on the site then I will leave.

Right now I am just really conflicted in this decision. Maybe from stress of real life or self loathing on my part. Right now I seriously want to know how people think of me since I am continuing to doubt myself too much and it is just pissing me off. Just something about myself I just want to get over with.