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Joined
Sep 29, 2011

Well, now! I must say that this is a lot easier to do than write my thoughts and what not in a paper notebook.
Then again, I type a lot faster than I actually write, sooo...

-Taps her temples;
Focus, Mich!

Alright, so I have... -Counts;
About... Three roleplays to get to.
I have to say, it's great to have a laptop once again.
I honestly missed the place.
I've found a lot of great roleplaying partners and it makes me smile.

I used to roleplay on Myspace. /shot
You can imagine how that was.

Anyway, I've decided I need to revamp my request thread.
I... really don't like how I formatted it.
It's kind of weird.
Actually, it irks. So, I'm going to do that.
And I need to find photoshop for my new laptop.
Then I need to start working on my stories...
Dear me, this is what I get for procrastinating.
-Rubs her temples;
Well, let's get things started.

It's great to be back. <3~
 
RE: A journal? For Mich? Oh, you shouldn't have.~


Oh, Mich. You lazy ass.
-Snorts;
I said I would get to revising it and...
I didn't.
FORSHAME. -Dramatic facepalm;

Well, it is true. I'm being a lazy ass. -Blames lack of sleep;

I have so many things to do.
STOPBEINGSODAMNLAZY,WOMAN.

-Coughs; Anyway...

-Rubs her temples; So many roleplays and starters to get to.
What's a girl to do?
I'll tell you. Get distracted by youtube, that's what.

Speaking of youtube, thank goodness for it.
I would have never known about Warriors Orochi 3.~

-Is a geek for Dynasty and Samurai Warriors;
It really got my brain going and now I have my muse back for working on my original characters for those games.

-Rubs her temples; Oi vey. I need to get photoshop.

I love how I just go from topic to topic.
Failure.
/shot.

 

You know, sometimes I have to wonder:

Why the hell do I attract people?

Seriously, it just doesn't make sense. When I'm not searching for anything, people show up and tell me how they feel and it's crazy. I am not that damn interesting.

I am a twenty year old girl who doesn't go to college, plays video games, writes, works, eats, breathes, and sleeps.

That is just not attractive, at all.

Sometimes, I just want to rip my hair out with how fate is laughing in my face and throwing these damn curve balls at me.

I'll get over it. It just drives me insane.

Oh, and I'd like to point out that I'm not trying to sound conceded. No way.

I think I'm ugly and boring so that's the last thing on my mind, haha.~
 

So... I just posted my pictures on the 'Post Your Face' thread and I'm kind of regretting it, but oh well.
What can you expect, you know?
Girls just tend to judge themselves too much and I really am my own worst critic.
Well, it's not just me, but other girls like to judge you:
'You're so fat.' 'Is that a guy or a girl?' 'Ew, she's ugly!'
Yep, I've had those things said to me before.
Kind of harsh, you know? I guess that's why I have low self-esteem, but things happen.
You learn to live with it and you keep going with life.
Haters are always going to hate. Bahaha.
 

I hate how I used to be in love with this one girl. She meant so much to me and I would have done anything for her. I always told her that I would listen and such, but now her and I don't talk anymore. I remember how she would say that she would have been with me after we really got to know each other. Now, she acts like I don't even exist.

This is a pretty pointless entry, but I just don't know.
It was bugging me because I saw on her on my MSN list.

Fail. Haha.
 

So! It's 3:05 as I'm writing this, but it's probably going to be later when this is posted.
Like... Five minutes later.
Oh, my. Rambling. FOCUS. -Flail;

Anyway, I realized that, as I was lazily editing pictures of myself, I'm very critical about myself.
I find most of my pictures horrendous.
Disgusting.
Ugly.

Yet, there are always those times that I feel like I'm pretty.
That I want to share that certain picture to the world to show my confidence.
To show that everyone should feel pretty.

But, what the fuck am I talking about?
I'm no life coach.
I'm sure there are girls out there who think:
"I'm so gorgeous."
Actually, I'm not sure, I'm positive.
And you know, there should be girls like that.
They give themselves confidence and say,
"Fuck you, I'm pretty."

I wish I had that attitude.

Well, at least I'm not one of those girls who has to call other girls ugly in order to feel pretty.

Nope. I can say a girl's ugly and still feel ugly.

Does that make sense? I have no clue.

Wow, I'm a bitch.
 

So, there's this guy at work...
I'll clear up everything and tell you I work at an ice rink.
Lamest. Job. Ever.
But, I like the cold so whatever.
Haha, that made me think of a polar bear.

FOCUS.
Alright, he's someone I don't work for.
Someone who is apart of a completely different area of work at my work place.

This guy has to be the biggest fucking douchebag I have ever met.
And I've met a lot of them.

He's just the rudest person I've had to deal with.
He tries to boss us around when he can do it himself and then says we need to shape up and change things around the rink?

Fuck you, mother fucker.
You're the one who's screaming and cussing at the little kids that you coach.
You want to tell me that we have to change?
Fuck you.

Oh, not only that, but he has done a few other fucked up things:
This prick has the nerve to pick on my best friend's boyfriend and then when her boyfriend leaves, pretty much ask if she was impressed by what he had done.

AREYOUKIDDINGME?

Dude, that is so rude. And my best friend was not impressed.

Moving on.
It was just me and him in the shop; I picked up the phone and was talking to someone when my best friend and her boyfriend come in.
He starts yelling in my ear when I'm trying to talk to a customer.
Seriously?

Oh, this happened on April 20th and my friends... Well, obviously you should be able to tell what they do. No, I don't do what they do.

This is the last thing about this guy... For now.

That douchebag had go and yell at my best friend's boyfriend, telling him not to smoke at work.

He had been there ALL DAY with me and never once did that.
That guy needs to shut the fuck up.

If you couldn't tell, I swear a lot when I'm pissed off, haha.

/end rant.

 

So... I've come to realize that I am slowly, but surely, becoming more comfortable with the way I look.
I don't find myself that pretty, at all, but I've found comfort in the decent pictures I've taken.

High school and what not was brutal.
I would always get teased and I've even heard that some people would say that I look like a guy.
It's kind of... heartbreaking.
That's when it's nice to have friends who support you and tell you you're beautiful and that those skinny bitches don't know shit.

Still, my confidence and self-esteem isn't that high.
It's not just the girls and guys from high school, no.
I had kids I watched at the youth group I used to be a leader for ask me if I was a guy.
Well, I had one ask me straight to my face and then one went into the room right next to where I was at and asked some other kid if I was a guy or a girl.

I seriously almost cried.

I get kids at work who still ask me that.

But, you learn to live with that.

I've learned to live with the fact that I may not be super pretty, but...
I have my good qualities.

I'll feel better about myself, some day.
 

It's almost two in the morning.
I have to be up in a few hours to get ready for work.
I'm a lame ass.
Bahaha.

Warriors Orochi 3 is totally ruling my life right now.
I swear I play that game every day. >_>

XIAO QIAO'S VOICE MAKES ME WANT TO BLOW MY HEAD OFF.
-_-; For real. I will take her stupid giant fan and smack her in the face with it.

So, yeah, if anyone asks for my craving, that's what it is.
Dynasty/Samurai Warriors or Warriors Orochi.

Wait a minute...

THIS ISN'T A REQUEST THREAD.

Haha. This is what happens what it's late [ Erm, early... ] and I need sleep.

I really need to get my request thread in order.
-_-;

Oh, oh, oh. A new Castle today. Sweet.

Sidetracked.
/facepalm.

--

I'd just like to point out what a huge idiot I am.
I wanted to say how I was in a huge fix to buy Dragon's Dogma when it came out.

Lack of sleep, FTW.

[ I had the desire to type that out, but then I thought I would get made fun of for doing that, haha. ]
 

Le sigh.

I don't think I've ever been this tired before.
Tired isn't the word.
Exhausted is.

Why does this suck huge monkey balls?
Because I have to drive today and sit at a three hour baseball game.

I'MGOINGTODIE.

And you know what's funny, my journal that never responds to me and just allows me use it to rant and such, I'm probably going to come back here after the game and be lazy.
I won't even go to sleep when I get home.
Bahahah.

And I just heard my brother say he lost the thirty dollar lighter I bought for him.
THEBASTARD!

Never again shall I buy him an expensive birthday present.
... That the lady actually gave me a discount for because she was awesome.

Do you see that?

That, my friends, is called ADHD, which I don't have.

I just like jumping from topic to topic.

/shot.
 

Today is just one of those days. I feel like shit.
I have no idea why, but it's just... Blah, I don't even know.
This happens sometimes; I'll feel great, all happy and chipper, then...
I don't know what happens. I just get really depressed and start thinking about my life.

No, no. I'm not thinking about suicide or anything so let's not jump off the wagon just yet.

I'm the type of girl just let bad things happen then I forget about them... Sometimes.

When I was gone for so long, it was for multiple reason with the main one being my lack of a laptop.
However, something happened two months after I lost my laptop that changed my life.

My father passed away.

Sometimes we didn't agree and whatever, but fact is, he was my dad.
I was his princess. That's what he called me. Cheesy, right? Yeah, fuck you. Don't judge.

Anyway, truth is, he wasn't my real father.
I was adopted at birth, but even though my parents aren't my biological parents, I'll always consider them such.
In being adopted, I know who my biological mother is, but my father, I have no clue.
There is one thing I know:

My father passed away on December 17th, 2011 when I was nineteen.
He had Alzheimer's.
I cry almost every time I think about him. I want my dad back, but he's not suffering now.
And he's with his own parents now.

I'm sorry, reader, I really didn't mean to get all depressing on you, but I just...
I felt the need to get this off my chest.
I'm a happy girl all the time, but sometimes I know that I need to get the feelings out that I keep bottled inside me.
This is one of those times.

I promise that next time, I'll be happier.
 

I hate developing feelings for someone over the internet.
It really, really sucks.
I'm not going to say that I regret what happened between us, but I do miss you.
You made me happy.
You made me smile.
It was nice for that short while.
Still, I hope that you're happy.

No, this isn't some poetic shit.
This is me being stupid and falling for someone.
I just wish they weren't on this site.

I need a fucking hug.
 

SO.
I got a new bed and everything today.
It's fucking AMAZING.
8D I'm so happy.
Work was chill. It was a great day. ;D

Also! Sorry if I'm slow.
I got Dragon's Dogma, so I've been obsessing over that. >_>;

There's a roleplay that I do need to get to, however...
I suck. Dx
 

Dragon's Dogma has taken over my life.
-_-; I'm sorry to those I have yet to reply to.
I WILL GET TO IT.
I'm just suffering from horrible writer's block.
It's totally kicking my ass, which I pretty much hate.
-Snaps her fingers; Damn it. Dx

____________________________________

AH. I'm a forgetful goose.
No... Not a goose. I don't like geese.
Anyway, I have a dentist appointment today.
EVIL. JUST EVIL.
I hate the dentist. Bah.
My sophomore year was dedicated to that.
Cavities and all that... Candy all the way, mother fucker.
Ah, that's what got me into this mess.
I chipped my tooth... While eating Skittles.
That's probably the lamest thing ever.
I'll go crawl in a hole after my appointment.
 

So, these past couple of days have been torture. Actually, no no. Scratch that. The past two weeks have majorly sucked ass.
...Hold on. Past week? Two weeks? Mother fucker, I don't know what freakin' day it is. -Is an idiot; Yes, I know it's 3:15 in the morning on Saturday as I'm typing this. HEY. I'm good for something.

-Facepalm; Alright, focus. Anyway, so, we've seen the post about the chipped tooth, right? -Points to post above then puts a sign there so she doesn't have to point; So, really, that shit didn't bug me. It didn't hurt chipping my tooth or going to the dentist. No... NO. What hurt was when they tried 'fixing' my tooth.

That mother fucker pulled out the nerve from my tooth and showed it to me. Put it right up to my eye.

...Ew. EW. I did not want to see the nerve of my tooth right in my fucking face. D:

So, yeah. They did that and I had a root canal yesterday.

DEARLORD. My first root canal did not hurt this much. My fucking tooth hurtsss. D: And I have to wait until Thursday at 7:30 to get my crown on my tooth. Did I mention that was in the morning? No? Oh, well, yeah. I'll mention it now.

Yes, I'm doing a lot of bitching. Blah, blah, blah.

Oh, I have roleplays to get to, as well. Blargh. Failure.
 

Ex lovers make me giggle. They are so damn annoying, for real.
One of my ex girlfriends told my friend, whom she has been on and off with, that I was obsessive over her.
BITCHPLEASE. There is a reason I never went to meet you, sweetheart. Fucking prick.
Now, really, I'm not one to get mad over things; I tend to just listen to music to get rid of le ragey Michie, but it doesn't always work. I've come to realize that bottling up my feelings isn't always the best thing.

I get depressed and moody. Gross. o.e;

Anyway, I'm not the one who tries to get back together with a girl that you left.
Not only that, you accused me of cheating, which you were fucking wrong about and it took you over a year to fucking realize it.

Mrow, I'm getting mad, if you couldn't tell. I swear when I'm upset. >_>; Anyway... -Coughs;

This bitch has the nerve of telling people shit about me that isn't true. I don't go around spreading rumors about you and I'd appreciate it if you didn't fucking do that to me.

I may be stupid enough to always accept you back into my life, but my friend is an idiot for accepting you. I love that girl to death, but you fucking cheated on her or did something to her life that made her upset and she just recently got back together with you. What the hell?

So, fuck that shit. I'm not going to watch things about you appear on my news feed on Facebook. I say, fuck you. You want to ruin someone's life, go right ahead. I won't fucking fall for you anymore, you bitch.

UGH. -Insert Napoleon Dynamite sigh here;

And there I go again, bitching about my pathetic life. -_-;

I need to go on a diet.

Random much?
 
You should totally go on a diet, they're fun. Loads of fun... Like... Whee... Oh fuck, who am I kidding. Being on a diet is terrible. :C

Still, I'm trying to do that myself at the moment, and I think it's working out okay, though I won't know for sure until I notice some serious change... And usually I lose motivation to keep up the diet/exercising before that happens. For me, weight loss would have to be like, RIGHT NOW! >_>

As for the rest of your post, I have no comment. ;D Other than you shouldn't even bother to still hang around/talk to that person in any way, shape or form. She seems like a gigantic bitch, to say the least.
 

-Snaps her fingers; I'm trying. Dx I'm just so lazy... -Has no motivation; -_-; I'm getting off soda. That's a step for me. I love that stuff. >_>; Candy needs to go, though. IT'SSODELICIOUS. D: -Flails about;

If I wasn't so lazy, I would totally do it. I would be like 'Yeah? FUCK YOU, WEIGHT LOSS. I'M GOING TO WIN THIS BATTLE BETWEEN US.' ...But, alas. It's kicking my ass. >_>;

And, trust me. I don't talk to her or hang around with her. If she ever says anything to me, I'd cuss her the fuck out. She doesn't know that I know about her saying things about me. Dumb bitch. >_>;

But, thanks for reading that, Hal. <3 Your comments made my day. ;D
 
I've been stalking your journal since you responded to mine ;D I just don't say anything unless I have something to say... God that statement sounded redundant. >.>

But yeah, I'm always watching, be very very afraid.
 

Oh ho ho ho. You're stalking me? Well, I'm not complaining. ;D

And well, the things you talk about are interesting. And when you're having bad days, I like to try and make you feel better. >:3
 

So, I suppose that I've found some motivation for me to lose weight and go on a diet.
Ugh, I've found out that I have diabetes a week or two ago.
I think I've kind of always known. I eat way too many sweets and it was bound to catch up with me.
Thankfully, the doctor says that it's controlled, but they just want to help get it really under control.
I guess I can understand that.

Still, just wanted people to know that if I seem a bit off or whatever...
Just dealing with that shit and what not.
 
Ouch, that sucks. I always used to think that I would get diabetes myself, the amount of sweets I ate in the past was pretty crazy. Like, I would get a box of cookies and empty it in a few hours. >.>

Still, it's not the end of the world, you'll be fine~ I've stopped eating sweets myself (though as a choice) and I'm still alive. After some time, you just won't even crave them anymore. Plus yeah, there's the positive diet side.
 
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