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Bunny Bits

Joined
Mar 31, 2009
Dear ___,

I'm only going to say this once. You are the LAST person that is going to make me feel guilty about being fucking honest with you. I'm honest with everyone and I was honest with you from day one. I'm done. I'm done feeling guilty for your fucking feelings. I told you everyday how I felt. We had discussions about how I didn't want that from you. Now you're going to make EVERY SINGLE good day I have clouded with guilt? Fuck that. I don't believe your ploy. You've cornered me, knowing I'm generally a good person and I too feel guilt. I have feelings, and I feel for other's feelings at times; especially people who are priviliged enough to get close to me. But, this is it.

Next person that corners me and expect me to dissolve into tears due to MY HONESTY. You can expect some teeth and claws. I will not live my life guilty. I've gone to great pains to be a good person in my eyes. I've discovered myself, who I am- what I want, and generally my beliefs on things. I stand for something; and that something is myself.

You can take your break from me due to your "feelings". But, don't expect to come back. There our no breaks for me. You're here; you're not. You're friends; you're not. There is not maybe, there is no lottering in gray areas. You pass through them, quickly and effienctly to get to where you set your sights on.

I've been through enough in my life, with mountains of guilt. It took me DECADES to release myself from those chains and I will not be shackled by some feeble minded, weaked hearted, shallow, pretentious son of a whore.

You are no friend of mine.

I'm breaking up with you</3.


Also, next person that believes someone's words about what I said over asking me exactly what was said will suffer the same fate.

Now, I'm going to go enjoy every fucking day of my two week vacation wether this guy likes me or not. And I don't feel one half a cent guilty about that.
 
Guilt is only a human emotion...but if you allow yourself to feel guilty over something you can't control...it'll have harsh effects on your own psyche. But you know this and you're not allowing yourself to be cornered. Just make it known that being your friend is a privlege and not a necessity, indulge in your life as you would, not as everybody else would. If you keep these morales, your vacation will be an enjoyable one. But you can't let feelings that run unrequited be your burden to carry. It's their shit to get over. All you can do is be supportive in the healing process or wash your hands of it if they are pestering you. No true friend is going to make you feel like you've wronged them just because they want something you can't supply... instead of enjoying what you can offer; Realistic insight. No friend is going to dabble in and out of your life and try to mindfuck you into feeling the same way.

Don't worry...I'm sure you'll find yourself forgetting about it more in the next two weeks than you think you will now. Good for you, for standing your ground.
 
Good for you Bun. Don't feel guilty about the said person at all. If they don't feed you, fuck you, or sign your paycheck, they are nothing to you. Simply put, end of story. But don't keep your guard up for everyone like you've said in specified situations. Please don't, because it can be hard to tell between phishing for info on a good gossip, and a true and sincere concern for you.....Though I'm sure you already know this. >.> But in any rate, you first, your heart next. Give them hell? :D
 
Yeah. Thanks everyone. But, anyway. I'm gonna do what I originally planned before I got pissy. Use this journal for bits of bunny. Nothing too personal. I just think its fun to look at pictures... I mean rather. When I look at pictures in the PYF I look at the person, but than I also look at the details. So, here's some bunny bits of my life!


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On Friday (and yes that is me in the funky lead filled X-ray Jacket) this puppy, Galinda, a french bull dog came in. She had snot bubbles comming out her nose. Had to make sure it wasn't in her chest.

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I HUNG BLINDS TODAY! Wooo! I need curtains. Maybe green...

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This is my fish, KAHRN. He's a blood god. He lives in my bathroom. My toothbrush is pink.


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My shoes. That I had to scrub clean from cat shit. Piled up on a towel like they came from holocaust victims : <

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My candle! Cupcake smell. And.. a sheep?​
 
Cute pictures. Poor Puppy. Though cupcake candles are the bomb. And though your shoes are piled up like poor victims, you have good taste in shoes.​
 
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Okay. So the navy silk one is cute. But I think it makes me look fat. But shows off nice boobs. The Red stripped is my favorite. Ties around the waist, makes me look lean, and red is my fav color. The tan was is just casual. the grey one was cute, and I was thinking of putting the black over it. The little sweater thing. All these could be paired with dark blue pants... Maybe skinny legs. Oh and the brown shirt with the pink, makes my tits look huge.. Dunno though.

Maybe I should lay out my sun dresses...

Disregard Luke walking over my cloths.
 
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Also Bourbon doesn't care if I has important business to do. The mouse is his. And he kicks me when I touch it.. QQ
 
O_O Bunny we have the same type of mouse AND mousepad! Well, mine's a Deathadder... But still! O3O
 
...Was that Left 4 Dead 2 I saw there? Is it any good?

I was going to get it after I got a new laptop. I'm pretty good at the first even with lag, so we should try to play when I get a new PoS that doesn't lag it.
 
Left 4 Dead 2 is pretty awesome.

But, Update (for all those that care): Woke up in the arms of the boy: ) Woke up before him really. I'm an early riser. My cats seem lonely that I didnt spend the night in their room. They are far too spoiled. They look at me with wide eyes.

Boy is still sleeping. I tried to crawl out unnoticed, but I've found this sleeping with someone thing makes it difficult to disturb them. However, I actually slept without any sort of nightmare, or dream for that matter. But, he was snoring in my ear.... I smiled, but then I realized that would probably fade in its novelty. And for all those wondering. No. No sex. Not now.. not soon. Not on this trip.

Making him wait. As it should be. Still isn't official. But, he's very sweet. And says he likes me a lot. We have an ongoing joke about how long it will take him to fall in love with me. I said 6 months, we bet on it. But, it seems that he thinks its going to be much sooner.

He's very affectionate, but not in the clingy way. There's a nice balance here. I think this will go places.

For anyone that talked to me on aim as I was in the airport. Lol, thought I was gonna throw up. First I couldnt figure out how to get out of the parking garage and panicked. Only to realize there's a reason for signs....

Then I didn't know where I was suppose to meet him. I had to work up the courage to ask information with the vague details that I have. I know this doesn't seem like something Bunny would have to do. But, there's bits of Bunny people don't know.

In anycase, sorry if I annoyed you with my contant chattering. I didn't think I would get on here at all in the next 2 weeks. But, I know people were asking where I was. I kinda dropped off the face of the planet for a couple hours when he arrived. Or, at least the internet planet. But, I'm okay. Wasn't kidnapped, didn't die; nothing of that sort. Today is movie day. It's rainy so we are heading up to the Mall to walk around and try and get a good movie in. I'm excited.

He thinks I'm pretty.

:)
 
I do hope things work out for you, Bunny. He sounds like a good guy for you. And derp, you are pretty.

And yes, I was talking about your knee-high heels. ;D​
 
Things aren't going well tonight.

I'm not good at the making out thing. Just nothing I'm experienced at. This turned awkward. There was silence in the dark.

So I got up. I feel frustrated with myself.
 
I'm getting better at it. I just need some direction ; )

I'm intent to pelase, just don't know how. But, it's going well. He's attentive, and sweet. But, like most men-- really bad with phrasing anything that has to do with his feelings<3

cats are stull mad at me. Everytime I enter the room they are all, "WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN"
 
Some simple things I have learned in the last month:

Leaving everything behind when there's nothing to leave is very easy.

Starting over isn't starting over. There's still the same worries and problems, and they follow you.

Living off Ramen.

Enjoying having less.

Quitting a job you hate isn't as hard when you have no choice; even when you feel guilty because you love your coworkers.

Being less uptight takes up less time.

Buying in bulk saves money.

Making eye contact and smiling at someone opens up a oppurtunity for friendship.

Letting him see you cry isn't a bad thing.

Telling someone no also isn't a bad thing.

Infact, expressing what is bothering you tends to help more then just trying to forget it. It tends to get solved and never reappear.

Doing things on my own because I have no choice makes it easier.

Waking up with an arm around you is a pleasure.

Morning breath isn't as bad as they say.

Little things count when big things aren't available.

Little gestures tend to go further than big gestures.

Boys are dirty.

I'm a lot cleaner outside my parents house.

The world seems bigger, yet less scary out of the "nest".

I'm not concerned I did things backwards.

Saying I love you and meaning it its hard. I'm not worried that neither have said it as of yet. I feel it at times. Other's not so much. Some looks he gives tells me he does. But, its not the right time to say it.

Having my three cats here is a comfort, and a burden.

I miss my home, but I'd never go back.

Crackers are a great substitute for when you can't afford bread.

Ramen is 13 cents a packet.

Living with someone means you always have a friend. And you will always bicker with that friend.

Doing things without your SO is priceless; relaxing, and needed.

Doing things alone with your SO is needed and wonderful.

Dates are still important.

Dating yourself is also still important.

Being comfortable in my own living environment is something I never experienced before and I am greatly blessed and very happy that I now have a place where I can be me totally, and do as I please without feeling sexually harassed or pinned to one area of the house due to the anxiety of conflict.

Worries and hardships pass, but they are difficult. However, unlike before they do not cloud my happiness.

You can live on hopes; as long as you have faith that they are attainable.

Patience isn't a virtue, it's nessassary.
 
Change is one of the great equalizers in life, as well as one of the greatest teachers. Sounds like you're learning all of that first hand and doing a damn fine job of it. Congrats!
 
So, if you don't know. I'm pregnant. And we are keeping the child.

If its a boy. The most possible name is: Gabriel William Henesy.
If it's a girl. The most possible name is: Scarlett Evelyn Henesy.
 
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