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Just friends (Sanantha & Sinfulrook)

Leo was surprised and caught off guard by her question. His biggest crush? He has had only one, and that was Alex. Would he dare tell her? He swallowed hard and exhaled slowly, then nodded a bit. "Well... I guess we are playing truth or dare for real, so..." He said and sighed one more time. He was having a hard time preparing an answer for her, and preparing himself for letting the answer out of his mouth. He took another small breath and exhaled it quickly, then inhaled another breath and kept his eyes on the road, keeping a really serious face.

"You, Alex..." He said clearly. At that moment, his cheeks flared up visibly now, and he wasn't embarassed, he was just wondering what she thought of his answer. He was actually getting a bit frustrated because he couldn't see her expression when he said it. He wanted to see, but they were just coming up an exit ramp towards their apartment. Only about twenty minutes left until they were at their new home.
 
Alex was shocked, frozen as she listened to his answer and her fears were instantly swept away. Emotions rushed through her, elation, embarrassment, and wonder as she stared at Leo who was still driving. Her first thought was that he was lying and trying to play a joke on her but that was pushed aside almost as fast as she thought it knowing Leo wouldn’t lie like that to her. Her next few thoughts were panicking and joy about the simple fact that he liked her too. Quivering in her seat Alexis finally felt her shock wearing away and was able to move again, she felt her face beat red and she turned away from hum burying her face into her arms and sighed in relief.

When she looked up she realized they were driving up an exit ramp and she decided to say something to Leo. “R-really?” her voice squeaked and wavered when she asked him if he really meant it. Alex couldn’t fathom him liking her back; she didn’t see herself as extraordinarily pretty or smart. In her mind she knew, not thought, but knew that there were better girls for him out there to like. Without getting her hopes up and fearing he'd dash them in an instant again she put her heart into her next question hoping he'd hear her emotion, "How long?"
 
Leo stopped at the red light that came up after a single turn after the exit ramp, sitting there for quite a while since there seemed to be a lot of traffic going from left to right in front of them, but not much going in their direction or in the opposite direction. He was still blushing, listening to her next question. They were still playing truth or dare, he remembered that. "I don't have to answer that, it's your turn." He said and turned to look at her, noticing she was blushing, but still stuck his tongue out at her.

"Truth or dare?" He asked her this time. It was her turn to pick one, and his turn to question her. He didn't know what to do if she asked for a dare, but he knew what he would ask her for truth. It was something he's wanted to ask her for a while, but he never had the guts to do it. Maybe now was the best chance he could ever get, and hopefully she wouldn't push him away for having him ask her that.
 
Grumbling under her breath when Leo brought up the game to refuse answering she wanted to know if he was being truthful and how much he liked her. At the moment she didn’t care about the game and wanted to end it but at the same time realized that Leo must be trying to get away from his own embarrassment and the awkward silence that had followed his answer. Alex couldn’t help but let out a little giggle when he stuck his tongue out at her.

It was her turn and she was afraid of the questions that he might ask, so Alex took the coward’s way out. “Dare.” Her face was blushed worried about what truth he might have asked, and not worried about what dare he would ask her. She’d never been all that adventurous unless Leo was with her, and when they decided to be adventurous together Alex remembered some of the disasters and hospital trips that had resulted through the years.
 
When he heard her say dare, he brought his hand up to his face and smacked himself square in the face. "Dammit, Alex...." He said and then sighed a little bit, starting to drive again after that extremely long red light. "Let me think for a second." He said as he kept focused on the road, but tried to think of a good dare for her that she would have to hold up. It struck him hard when he thought about the apartment.

"I dare you to help me carry everything inside to our apartment!" He said with a big smile and looked at her while stopped at another stoplight. Whenever they went out somewhere, whether it was camping, or just bringing lots of stuff over somewhere, he always had to bring it all inside and unpakc it while she just put them where they belonged. This time, she was going to do her fair share of work as well.
 
Giggling as she obviously picked something he wasn't expecting but soon he'd picked something that she hated. "Leo!!!" Her voice came out as a whine, "You know I'm not as strong as you..." trying to plead and make him change his mind she gave him a pout, "fine...I guess a dare is a dare." She crossed her arms and stared out her window as they started to move through the light again. "Your turn, truth or dare?"

Still pouting she glared at him waiting for him to choose, she wasn't sure what she would ask or what she would dare if he picked that but she definately wanted some answers about him having a crush on her. Waiting Alex saw the appartment complex pull into sight as Leo drove through town. All the while she was looking around trying to remember where certain shops, restaurants and different things were that they passed.
 
Leo laughed a little bit at her whining. "You're right, a dare is a dare." He told her and saw her looking out the window and away from him, knowing that she was pouting away from him. He would've changed his mind about the dare, but she most likely knew that she would only have to carry one thing in at least. "Hmm..." He hummed as he thought about whether he should tell her a truth or do a dare. She already asked him who was his biggest crush, so maybe it was time for a dare. No, it wasn't time yet.

"Truth again." He said and after a very short while they finally pulled up to the parking lot in front of their apartment building. "1750 through 1760, I think this is our entrance." He said as he slowly drove past all the entrances, then pulled up to an empty space near the door leading inside the building. As he parked the car and turned it off, he relaxed in his seat after taking out the key, waiting for her question before he got out.
 
Groaning Alex tried to figure out which of her questions were most important in her mind and she'd figured it out just as Leo parked the car in front of their appartment. "How long?" She didn't even look at him as she waited for his answer instead she fiddled with the hem of her shirt rubbing and tugging the cloth between her fingers. Licking her lip she looked up but not at Leo instead she took the cowards way out and looked at the appartment building.

Apparently it was more like a townhouse, the large building was split in the middle a very beautifully designed mixture of brick and white vinyl siding that made the buildings look like something from the colonial period. There were even a pair of little plain columns on the front porch that led into their half of the building. On the second floor there was a large arched window that she could see probably sat at the top of the stairs and looked like it had a window seat in it, Alex knew that she would definately spend quite a bit of time up there. Finally deciding she'd spent enough time checking out the building she turned to Leo and raised an eyebrow waiting for her answer.
 
Leo was sitting back in his seat, trying to get all the frustration of driving out of him in a calm and relaxed manner. He heard her question, but he just stared at the beautiful building in front of them. After a short while, he turned to look at her only to see her raising an eyebrow to him. "Before highschool..." He told her and then slowly opened his side of the car. He slowly got out and then searched his pocket for the keys that were given to him when he was first here and when he first paid off the first two months of rent.

He closed the driver's door on the car and then went to the back seat to grab a box, a heavier one that was filled with her things, most of his things in the trunk of the car. "I don't remember exactly when, but I'm sure it was either seventh or eighth grade." He told her honestly when she got out and then started walking with the box towards the door to the staircase leading into the building. He opened up the door and started slowly climbing up the stairs, finding their apartment number and then waiting for her to come get the door for him, the keys to the place in his hand under the box.
 
Sitting still in shock she tried to process what Leo had said and trying to figure out how she’d missed it if he’d liked her that long. Another part of her brain wondered how if he liked her for so long, did he miss that she loved him, she’d liked him before high school and somewhere along the way she knew it had transformed but she was still scared of anything happening. On one hand she was ecstatic at finding out that he returned her feelings, on the other she was scared of what could happen to their friendship. It was the same fear that had kept her from saying anything for years now and Alex wasn’t sure what to do about it.

Finally she broke her trance and grabbed her purse and her pillow following him up the stairs to their apartment door. Getting to the landing she saw him waiting in front of a door and stopped, tilting her head and looking at him quizzically trying to figure out what he was doing. Suddenly the fact that he held the box with both hands registered and she walked forwards taking the keys and popping open the door and turning on the lights. Heading inside she looked around the apartment glad that they had gotten a furnished one, the furniture was beautiful but still looked so comfortable. Heading deeper into the apartment to explore she forgot she was supposed to be helping to unpack the car as she went from room to room looking at everything.
 
Leo stood there and just waited for her to grab the keys. Once she opened the door, he went inside, looking around the place and seeing lots of furniture around. It was nice to not have to worry about furniture, and it all looked so fresh and clean. He set the box down near the door, but out of the way so they wouldn't trip over it. He sighed as he saw her walk off and explore, going back downstairs to start grabbing more boxes out of the car, the heavier ones so that she didn't have to worry about carrying so much and getting tired so soon.

As he was walking down the stairs of the apartment building, he thought of what she was thinking about him right now. He probably shouldn't have told her about his crush on her, it could've ruined their relationship as friends, although he didn't know if it hadn't already. As he grabbed another box, he slowly made his way back up, mumbling to himself. "I wonder if she likes me too..." He mumbled quietly and went into the apartment, placing another box down beside the door. "Alex, where are you?" He asked, shouting a little bit.
 
Lying on the bed Alex was luxuriating in the huge space that she’d claimed as hers. Looking around the room she saw that the bed only ate up about a sixth of the space even though it was a rather large bed. While she looked around thoughts about Leo’s answer kept rushing through her mind. Things like, how come if he’d liked her for so long did he not know she liked him, and how did she not know beforehand. If they could hide that from each other what else had they hidden from each other? Groaning as tried to stop her thoughts she rolled face down on the bed and covered her head with her arms.

Now that she was on this line of thinking, she pondered the possibility of them actually being a couple. The intriguing thoughts about a happy future were once again followed by all of the bad that could possibly come from it, a ruined friendship, hatred and no more Leo. Biting her lip she decided that she couldn’t risk losing Leo, it was why she’d always hidden it in the first place. Hearing him call out for her Alex stoop up and called back, “The larger bedroom!”
 
Once Leo had heard her voice, he went into the large bedroom only to see the bedsheets a little bit ruffled up and her standing next to the bed. "Hey, whatcha doing in here?" He asked her and went over to her, taking her wrist gently. "Come help me, you promised me in that dare." He said kindly to her, almost pouting a little bit. He managed to keep his mind off the thought of him and her going out together, but it all rushed back to the front of his train of thought as he tugged at her wrist. He was more worried about losing her as a friend rather than fearing that she didn't like him.

"What's on your mind?" He asked and let go of her wrist, knowing that something was on her mind since she looked so serious. "Is it about my answer...?" He asked a bit shyly and turned away from her, feeling like his fears were coming true. Was she going to hate him now because he admitted his crush for her? Or is she going to hate him because he hid it from her? He didn't want to lose Alexis, he needed her in his life to make it any good.
 
She shrugged not looking him in the face. "A little..." On one had Alex was determined not to tell Leo her feelings on the other she just wanted to tell him so she didn't have to carry and hide such thoughts. The deception or simply lack of her sharing this with him left her feeling disconnected from him in a way she wasn't used to feeling. Shaking her head Alex kept her eyes from meeting his, still warring with herself over what she wanted to to. Knowing how Leo was taking this, as her not returing her feelings was both a relief and it hurt at the same time. But most of all fear was what ruled her mind and she started to shake worrying about losing Leo's friendship.

Finally she dragged her eyes up his face, meeting his she felt herself shivering again, her bottom lip quivering and her eyes filling with moisture. She tried to talk but her thraot was scratchy, dry and closed on her words making her let out a choking sound. Swallowing she tried again, though her voice came out hoarse and quiet, small sounding almost like a little girl's. "I-I'm...scared Leo..."
 
Leo stood there, watching her looking away from him, but when she turned to him with a quivering lip and watery eyes, he heard the voice of a little girl, his best friend Alex. When she said that, he was surprised at how scared she looked and sounded, but he knew what to do. He quickly walked over to her and pulled her into a tight hug, slowly sitting down on the bed and letting her rest against his chest. "Shhhh, Alex, don't cry..." He whispered as he rubbed her back gently and held her close. "Don't be scared..." He whispered again, trying to comfort her as best as he could.

He now knew what she was thinking, and it was the same thing he was thinking. "Alex, I promised you a long time ago..." He said to her, looking down at her. "Remember? I promised I would always be your friend, no matter what happened between us." He said to her truthfully and kissed the top of her head. "I would never abandon you as a friend, not even if you shoved me away and ignored me the rest of my life." That last sentence he said with his eyes starting to water up a little bit. He was starting to get emotional as well, and everything he said was true.
 
Hugging him back Alex clung on as if he might suddenly turn to wisps and float away, she let him pull her down next to him on the bed and pushed her face into his chest breathing deeply taking in his scent. Sniffling a little holding back her tears she nodded as he told her not to be scared and that he’d always be her friend. Even as she was nodding her mind kept saying that things change especially after relationships. Trying to ignore that part of her mind and calm down she sniffled again and pushed her head up off his chest and sat upright next to him.

“I wouldn’t ignore you…I just…things change…you know,” she wasn’t looking at him, rather she kept her eyes on her hands giving weak little gestures to emphasize her points. “Especially if anything happened and then we weren’t together anymore, that always changes things, we’ve seen it so much.” Her voice conveyed her fear and the defeated sense that was her largest emotion as she realized that a relationship was too risky.
 
Leo let her sit upright next to him, but he kept one arm around her on her shoulder, rubbing it gently while she spoke. He looked down at her hand with her, watching her small gestures that she made. As she said they've seen it happen, he sighed and turned his head to look at the doorway in front of them. "I know what you mean, Alex." He said softly to her, pulling her a bit closer to him, hugging her with his one arm. "I know a relationship is a risky shot, but...." He paused and then turned to look at her, noticing her still quivering a bit in fear.

He leaned his head towards her and kissed her forehead gently. "Alexis, I swear to you, right here and right now, that if we ever do get into a relationship, and if that relationship ends, I will still be the same friend that I am right now." He said to her, hoping that would comfort her. He meant it too, he would never leave her alone or change just because they had a fight or something. "I would never sever the bond that we have as friends." He told her softly and then hugged her with both arms again, resting his head gently on top of hers, closing his eyes.
 
Shaking her head Alex tried to block out what he was saying. Her fear was getting the better of her, even though rationally now that they both knew about their mutual attractions things would change anyways. Alexis wasn’t thinking rationally though and her fear over losing her best friend, the one she’d had for years and years, was utterly terrifying despite all that he could do to comfort her. Despite his promises she knew that if they had a failed relationship, things would change it was inevitable, they might even remain friends after, but it would never be the same closeness, there would always be awkward moments between them if they tried and failed.

Still, she let him comfort her, his arms wrapped around her and his head resting on hers. His strength and was something she needed and she soaked it up as if she could literally take it from him. That sense of calmness and total surety worked to slowly calm Alex’s nerves. After a short while she wasn’t freaking out anymore but she had decided that she couldn’t take the chance, wouldn’t take the chance on losing him. “I…We just can’t… Things would change.” She pulled away and wouldn’t meet his eyes as she sat there, at that point Alexis knew that she’d never be the one to make the first move for anything more, that fear of losing him was too great.
 
Leo just held her there, sitting there, trying to think this through very thoroughly. He thought of the idea of them just having awkward moments when they hung out together, and he didn't like that. Perhaps it's just a little too soon to start dating his best friend, even if they have known each other since elementary school. when she slowly pulled away, his hand stayed on her back, rubbing her back very slowly, noticing that she has calmed down. He knew what she meant, and he didn't want things to change too much. Then it hit him...

"Alex, things will always change, it's how life works..." He told her softly and then took his hand away from her, slowly getting up from the bed. It was true, life changes constantly, and you just have to deal with it as it comes to you. "Come on, let's go finish bringing stuff up, then we can call it a day after we make our beds." He told her with a smile and reached a hand out towards her, wanting to help her get up and help him finish carrying all their things inside. The entire time he thought about what she said, and she was right, but ignoring the changes or staying away from them would just make it seem even more awkward for them. That's not something he wanted.
 
Some small part of Alex knew that things were going to change anyway because now they knew, but the majority of her decided that it was better this way. With that in mind Alex took comfort from him rubbing her back before he stood up and reached for her deciding to put everything off for a while. Alex was glad that Leo wasn’t getting upset or making a big problem out of this, and instead he was doing exactly what Alex needed and turning to something else to get her mind off of everything. Taking his hand Alex let him pull her up before they spent the next few hours carrying all of their boxes and furniture and starting to set up their rooms.

Finally Alex walked back into their small living room and collapsed onto the couch with a groan. “I’m done…no more…make it stop…” For the past eight hours they had unloaded and then set about putting their apartment in order. They had set up and positioned the furniture that they had ordered when it was delivered that afternoon, they also had to put their own rooms to rights and finally Alex had had enough. She was only halfway through with unpacking herself but she figured that everything could wait until tomorrow, or the day after, or whenever she got around to it. Groaning she turned her head to the side instead of facing into the cushion and looked around the living room, “We need dinner…”
 
Leo and Alex were unpacking for so long, he had completely lost track of time. When he looked at the clock by the time he was only half done, he groaned and just fell onto his bed for a moment. There was still so much more to unpack, he couldn't do it all in one day like he thought he would be able to. He slowly got up and wandered into the living room like a zombie, his arms swinging side to side as he walked. When he saw Alex on the couch, he sighed a bit and went to go sit in the recliner, sprawling himself out on it, laying on his back almost.

He heard her say they need dinner, then he groaned more. "Dammit, I don't wanna get up..." He said with a whine, not wanting to go pick up dinner or make it. He didn't even want to go pick up the phone to call some place. "You do it." He said and closed his eyes, letting out a yawn. He didn't even know a local place that they could call to get delivery. He ignored everything for the moment, waiting for her to go get the phone and call up a fast food place to deliver.
 
Alex groaned and glared at him while he lay on the recliner. “Why do I have to get up…” finally after a few minutes she grumbled and forced herself up and into the kitchen where she’d stuffed the phonebook they’d found on their doorstep earlier. Flopping back onto the couch she lay down and started flipping through the book until she found something that sounded good to her. Making an order she didn’t even ask Leo what he wanted and just got him something from the menu that came up when she called. “Chinese in 20 minutes…you’re paying.” With that she threw the phonebook at him for making her get up and call.

Being tired and slightly cranky Alex pushed their earlier revelations and problems from her mind and just vegged on the couch. Finally she gathered the energy to reach out grabbed at the remote control pulling it to her by her fingertips across the coffee table. Turning on the TV she made sure to turn on sixteen and pregnant to annoy Leo. It was crap TV but Alex actually enjoyed it, watching the silly girls and their freak outs and arguments and the stupid things they did because they weren’t smart enough to take the pill or keep it in their pants made Alex feel better about herself. Deciding to go back to their game earlier Alex said into the quiet room, “Dare.”
 
Leo watched Alex get up and call up some restaurant. When she said Chinese, he smiled a little bit and then yawned. It's not like she didn't know what he was going to order anyways, and when he heard her place an order for him, he smiled more. She knew him so well, it wasn't surprising really, but it made him feel good for some reason. When she threw the phonebook, it hit him in the face. The book slid down onto his chest and Leo just layed there still, bringing a hand up to rub his face and nose a little bit. It wasn't broken thankfully, but it did hurt. "I get a phonebook to the face for paying..." He grumbled a little loudly and then watched her grab the remote.

The second that remote reached her hands, he wanted to just run into his room and plug his ears, but he had no energy. He knew what she was going to turn on, and he hated the whining of those teenage girls. It was the most annoying thing in the world, listening to girls whine and cry about their problems, when there are bigger things to worry about. Suddenly he heard her say 'dare', and he sighed. "I dare you to change the channel to something that doesn't involve girls whining about their stupid problems." He thought of the dare instantly, not wasting a single second.
 
Groaning Alex felt like she should have expected him to do something about her choice of TV. With a little bit of grumbling she flipped to the TV guide channel and watched the different options scrolling past and finally switched it over to reruns of Law and Order there wasn’t really that much to watch in the middle of the afternoon during the week. Throwing the remote over and into his lap she rolled so that she was laying on her back and crossed her arms under her chest with an exaggerated “harrumph” before turning her head to glare at him, “Fine, but that was a sucky dare…just so you know.”

Now that she’d complied with his dare and especially as it made her change from one of her favorite TV shows, at least daytime TV shows she decided to pout and wait for dinner watching the legal and detective mumbo-jumbo on the show. Only about half of what they were talking about really made sense to her but Alex decided to just shove that thought to the side and attribute it to her blonde hair. After all despite being in all advanced classes Alex definitely had her share or even more than her share of ‘blonde moments’. Finally after what seemed like an eternity as her stomach grumbled and growled, clearly audible in the room she heard a knock at their door and didn’t even bother to get up knowing that Leo would because he was paying for it.
 
Leo chuckled a bit as she huffed while crossing her arms under her chest, holding the remote in his hand now and just looking at her, rocking a little bit in the recliner. "Oh come on, we both know that show is not reality, it's just staged crap with scripts everywhere." He told her and then just continued to watch the crappy law show. He hated watching TV, he would rather have his computer all set up so he could play his games, or at least entertain himself with a movie rather than this boring cable line-up.

Soon enough, Leo heard the knock on the door, and then stood up, throwing the remote onto her stomach and then going to answer the door. While walking, he pulled his wallet out of the back of his pants pocket and then opened the door. He took the chinese food and then paid the delivery guy, tipping him two bucks since that was all he had left. After he closed the door, he went over to Alexis and gave her the food she ordered for herself, knowing just by the smell. "Here you go." He said and gave her a plastic spork as well, then went back to sit in his recliner. When he sat down, he carefully opened his container and began eating his own food, enjoying it a lot more than he normally did, very thankful that Alex ordered for them.
 
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