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A poem to Raise Bully Awareness

FoxWriter

Cluster
Joined
Jan 20, 2011
Location
in the realm of lust and seduction
i post this in every site that i go to, including the many profiles i had on DA (I'm sorry if I'm not supposed to say other websites. very very sorry...) to help raise awareness that bullies are a problem in schools and in life.

i wrote this poem in middle school, and touched it up just after i finished high school, so it's a bit old. this Poem is in loving memory of my friend (who will remain nameless) who committed suicide after being bullied.

please feel free to post this Poem onto your own page! spread the word! share it on other websites, just please don't change the words. TY

PLEASE BE WARNED: the following Poem is slightly graphic ion content. anyone under the age of sixteen should not read this poem, Moon Struck Fox will not be held responsible for any one who reads this despite the warning. thank you.

The Bully Syndrome

hello to all and take a seat.
for the story i tell is quite a feet
this tale i tell is one of sorrow
please, don't forget it on the marrow
i awoke in Monday morning hell
filled with dread at schools bell
there they waited like everyday
the bullies buds in every way
they taunted and teased and no one cared
but should someone help. none where spared
day after day i went to school
again and again i was made a fool
after months of being hated
all alone, frustrated and deflated
so many days of silence
i thought as i sat in science
contemplating my life
why should i live in such strife?
and so later that day i found a gun
and shot myself under the sun.
as i felt my brains fly
i noticed myself rising into the sky
people grieved at my passed life
but no one had noticed my growing strife
no one cared, that you'll see
how a bully affected me.
no one cared to find out, which is fine,
why I'd ended this life of mine
and the bully's they are a fan
all the happiness of someone else has ran
a new target they have found
the vicious cycle going round
and so i say to everyone
out there in the sun
if they start bullying a few
put your foot down and say "screw you"
and shout it loud into the sky
"don't you fear them bullying guys"
they aren't anything but fools
shout it out
"STOP BULLY'S IN OUR SCHOOLS!!!"
 
I like it alot. but you need to be more conscious of the way you use your I's. the lower case i is great for showing weakness and self pity. it represents a lack of fixed identity. If you start with the lower case i and then at the let my brain fly bit you switched to the stronger upper case I, the poem would be stronger
 
hmm. i never thought of that! it's actually just a case of my computer not recognizing i as an improper word XDD i'll have to fix it^^ thanks for the assistance! it's so nice to have someone willing to help me improve my writing^^
 
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