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Dreams?? - Printable Version

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+--- Thread: Dreams?? (/showthread.php?tid=14106)



Dreams?? - [[black_rose]] - 01-18-2009 11:54 AM

I don't know I hardly have any dreams anymore but I had one last night..really really scary cause I don't want this one master to find me but I still search for him. Well I had a dream that I found him on another site then he joined this one and I became his..I don't want to fnd him for reasons that everyone knows about..if any of you remember hesphaestus I used to be one of his slaves..he treated me horrible nad made a big impact in my life..Dunno whats wrong but for some reason my mind has been focused on him for a month now and everytime I try to get it out it just comes back in my mind..-sighs- any advice on how to get this fucked up and abusive master out of my head??


Re: Dreams?? - ZOMBiiE - 01-18-2009 03:15 PM

If you don't want to be degraded and abused, stop being a slave...
As for getting him out of your head, just find someone better then him.


Re: Dreams?? - Calista - 01-18-2009 04:37 PM

I'm not trying to bash people who like the S&M lifestyle, but really, if you wanted to be treated like an equal, loved, cared for and taken care of, then you're most likely not going to find it in a Master/Slave relationship. I mean, just look at what you define yourself in that relationship! A slave. I honestly do not think anyone can be happy in such a relationship unless they're treated like equals, but since the definition of slave isn't really an equal... you're most likely not going to find that. : / Maybe some Master/Slave relationships work, but I think it would take a massive amount of trust and the 'Master' would have to see the 'slave' as his/her equal - those two things seem unlikely, unfortunately.


Re: Dreams?? - Vekseid - 01-18-2009 04:46 PM

Calista Wrote:I'm not trying to bash people who like the S&M lifestyle, but really, if you wanted to be treated like an equal, loved, cared for and taken care of, then you're most likely not going to find it in a Master/Slave relationship. I mean, just look at what you define yourself in that relationship! A slave. I honestly do not think anyone can be happy in such a relationship unless they're treated like equals, but since the definition of slave isn't really an equal... you're most likely not going to find that. : / Maybe some Master/Slave relationships work, but I think it would take a massive amount of trust and the 'Master' would have to see the 'slave' as his/her equal - those two things seem unlikely, unfortunately.

In healthy master/slave or dom/sub relationships the word trust gets used a lot, but there is also responsibility - being responsible and caring for the 'lesser' partner. A lot of so-called dominants want the power but not the responsibility.


Re: Dreams?? - Calista - 01-18-2009 04:49 PM

Vekseid Wrote:
Calista Wrote:I'm not trying to bash people who like the S&M lifestyle, but really, if you wanted to be treated like an equal, loved, cared for and taken care of, then you're most likely not going to find it in a Master/Slave relationship. I mean, just look at what you define yourself in that relationship! A slave. I honestly do not think anyone can be happy in such a relationship unless they're treated like equals, but since the definition of slave isn't really an equal... you're most likely not going to find that. : / Maybe some Master/Slave relationships work, but I think it would take a massive amount of trust and the 'Master' would have to see the 'slave' as his/her equal - those two things seem unlikely, unfortunately.

In healthy master/slave or dom/sub relationships the word trust gets used a lot, but there is also responsibility - being responsible and caring for the 'lesser' partner. A lot of so-called dominants want the power but not the responsibility.

I agree with you completely. There is a lot of responsibility when you give someone so much power and authority over another. I find it's mostly 'internet Doms' who are the ones who just want the power and no responsibility, because they know that they can do pretty much whatever the hell they want on the internet. Those type of people, from what I've observed, have no power in real life so they enjoy taking advantage and abusing others online to make themselves feel powerful. >_>


Re: Dreams?? - Osheaga - 01-21-2009 06:46 PM

[list][list]
It's definitely an obsession when he's a strong depiction in your dreams.

All I can tell you to do is find a new obsession to replace an old one.
'Quitting cold turkey,' so to speak, is difficult, especially in your situation.

When I find myself crushing hard on a boy,
and he's always on my mind, I just sit in my room and write music,
then strum it out on my bass.

I get so into it that I actually get my orchestra together and make an arranged piece of music with it!

Hence, a new obsession. xD
[/list:u][/list:u]


Re: Dreams?? - The King Of Yaoi - 01-21-2009 07:11 PM

I rarely remember my dreams....

But I've had a few that have come true... so whenever I do remember its usually something I'm being told. x3



Re: Dreams?? - sweetnecter - 01-21-2009 10:48 PM

I love my Dom firned he is so fun to talk to and is fairly nice but yeah don't be a slave if you don't want to be treated bad, be a girl friend or lover or soemthing else.


Re: Dreams?? - Ilovegoatse - 01-21-2009 11:33 PM

Engaging in the lifestyle with the whole irl deal, lemme tell you...

It's nothing like what you see on most roleplays, kinky sex times and leather.

It's actually a bit more complicated then most people think, the sub has more control than the dom does. After all, they get to tell them how far they're allowed to go, and they're serving them out of their own devotion. They could just as well choose to leave the dom to find someone else, but they actually picked this person to take care of them. The dom also depends on the sub for everything, for taking care of them in exchange for the protection they offer. The feeling of serving someone is lovely if they're the right kind of dom, they won't be pointlessly abusive. After all, they only punish you if you did something bad, duh, not just randomly to get their kicks.

If you're into a more violent relationship, sure you can work that out. But it's all consensual, it's not rape, and what physical punishment occurs, has been agreed on prior to it (such as boundaries set). It makes me disgusted when people think that it's all about the leather, the abuse, and just treating someone like shit. The point isn't to treat someone like shit, it's to exchange what you both long for to take care of one another.

In relevance to the topic, let me say that you're looking at the wrong place for masters. Also, dreams aren't literal, just like poetry isn't. He probably just represents anxiety in your life, and your brain just associates it with him. Confront the issue or just deal with it.


Re: Dreams?? - sweetnecter - 01-21-2009 11:38 PM

Ilovegoatse is right like I said my Dom buddy is so nice to everyone and his subs like him so having a bad master is your own coice.

And if you are trying to find him in a dream maybe you are seeking out issues? I don't know you but if you go looking for trouble... And you said before I think you are done with those kind of men (I could be wrong though) So maybe your subconciouse is pointing out your old life style and that change will be hard becasue you will be tempted to go back to it?


Re: Dreams?? - Ilovegoatse - 01-21-2009 11:55 PM

Exactly, and a bad master really isn't one at all.. it's just a controlling moron with issues.


Re: Dreams?? - sweetnecter - 01-21-2009 11:58 PM

Yup bad masters are just abusive. But most of the Doms I know sign a type of contract say what they can and cannot do to the sub. Yeah i know some kinky BDSM people they are cool.


Re: Dreams?? - Vixen - 01-22-2009 07:13 AM

It is probably just a dream and nothing more. If he's been on your mind a lot he's bound to be in your dreams. Try to find something to do to keep your mind busy. Choose a new hobby or try doing something you haven't done before. Paint, draw, do puzzles, scrapbooking, baking, woodwork...