Some of Treena's Old Poems

[Treena Hawkins]

Your Nightmare
Every dark corner shows a slight stream of light, but in my heart there is no light.
Inside a husk harbors a life form, but in my husk of a body I hold no soul.
What once loved is now cold, dark, and empty.
What once held hope now craves strife.
The beast has been unleashed and now there is no going back.
My departed love, hope, and dreams have darkened your dreams.
Welcome to the nightmare you caused.

Thief
You entered my life like a thief in the night, your kisses left me wanting more.
The feel of your body pressed against mine made my heart beat faster.
Just like a thief, you stole my heart and left me with nothing.
You have left me wanting you as a souless, loveless, and heartless shell.
I am one with the undead, and all I can say to you now is that because of you now I am a child of the night.

The Darkness
I am traveling deep with in my own mind.
I have become lost between the places I once called hope and love.
I never wish to be found because I am safer here.
Do not worry I will be fine just as long as you are happy.
My heart knows no pain as long as I stay here lost in my own world.
I now call this place home.
Goodbye my former life and love.

....Love
Love affects us in mysterious ways.
You can love a person when you first lay eyes on them,
or you can let the love build.
You want the person you love to be happy even if they are not with you.
When they do love you as much as you do them,
everything seems to stop for you two.
Little things that they do mean the world to you,
and in your eyes they are the only one.

...This is it.
I have lost everything that means anything to me.
I tried to be happier person but that is not who I am.
I tried to be more out going as well, but in the end that is not who I am.
I thought that if I were not myself that maybe I would be noticed.
Well I got noticed but in the end I lost what I cared for most,
I lost myself and you.
Starting from this moment I will be invisible again,
no longer will you see a peppy, out going person.
From now on I am the shy, relclusive girl I was years ago.
No longer will I shed tears, for I am a shell of my former self.
Goodbye the person I was and hello to the new, old me.​

will post more later

 

[Treena Hawkins]

The Chosen
The room seemed dark when she entered.
He felt her presense though.
She was the chosen one.
She had a destiny that was unknown to her.
There were others there sent to kill her.
He was to, but he had fallen in love with her.
She does not stay long.
She is followed by one of the others.
He leaves after them.
There is a scream and he finds the others.
He shows her his true form.
The one that loves her now saves her.

A Poem from the Heart.
When I was in his arms I felt safe,
there was a fire burning in my heart.
Was he the one to reawaken my soul?
Being in his arms made everything better,
I hope that the goddess will bless me again.
My feelings for him whatever thery may have been,
have given me hope.
No regrets, only happy memories of the short time we spent togther.

No Title
How can I can feel like this?
You walk into my life, but I am not to have feelings for you.
I never melted at anyones touch, but yours makes my heart thump faster.
What is it about you, that makes you different from the rest?
Why do you inspire feeling in me that I never felt before?
How can I stop this before it gets to far?
I do not know but hopefully I will find out before it is to late.

Loves Regret
I sit here thinking about my life.
I wonder if things would be different had I not turned you away.
Would you love me the same if you knew my fears.
Could you hold me if you knew what I had done.
I love you so much but I have done so much that hurt you.
Will you love me even if you go to heaven and I go to hell.
I think I know the answer, that is why I want you to leave me.
You need a love that is pure and my love is not.
I am tainted with the feelings of loveing others.
You need some one that only loves you.
That is why this wil be the time I talk to you.
Just know that you have a place deep in my heart.

Something from My Heart
Before you I felt broken,
Before you I didn't believe in love,
Before you I was alone,
Before you I thought that life had no meaning,
Before you I lived in darkness.
Now I am whole again,
Now I know love,
Now I have you to hold,
Now I want to live,
Now I live in the light.
Because of you everything is magical.
These things that you do for me are why I love you so.

The Future (ok this was wrote when I was 15 for english 1 honors.)
Who am I?
I am a girl.
Where will I die?
Hopefully on a ship called the Squirrel.

Who will marry?
Maybe someone named Adam.
When I am fifty will I be scary?
Hopefully I will be all glam.

Who will I be?
Where will I go?
Will I be able to ski?
Will I see a show?

Will I go to college?
Will I grow old?
Will I own a cottage?
Will I be bold?

Will I ever fall in love?
Will I have children?
Will I see a dove?
Will I have a friend named Ben?

Will I own a laptop?
Will I write a book?
Will I own a shop?
Will I learn to cook?

Will I go to France?
Will I speak French?
Will I learn to dance?
Will I meet Coach Lynch?

Will I ever learn to swim?
Will I meet my soul mate?
Will I meet a person who has lost a limb?
Will I have a great first date?

Monster
What have I done?
I didn't chose to be this way.
I thought he loved me,
but he did this to me and was gone.
I'll never see the light of day.
Why have I become a monster.[/align]

---

You Say
You say the things you say to hurt me.
What will you do when I do not hurt.
You say that you love me and will die with out me.
What will you do when I say I do not care.
You say that I am cold and heartless.
What will you do when I say then so I am.
You say you things in hopes of getting my attention.
What will you do when I am not there.
I tell you now, I went through this once before
this is nothing new.
I jumped into it to soon,
but there is someone out there for you,
but she is not me.

....
I am gonna dance and count the days till we can see each other.
I don't care what people say, you are the light to my darkness.
When you talk to me all I hear is your words turned to music.
Sometimes I wonder how I became so lucky to have met you.
I am gonna dance and count the days till we can see each other.

No Title
Though we have the distance between us,
our hearts know no bounds and love one another still.
To hear your voice whisper my name when I sleep,
even when you are so far away from me,
is what keeps me here.
Our souls are one as is our hearts.
Till the day I can feel you caress me in your arms,
I wait and love you,
knowing that you are waiting and loving me as well.

Shattered
The world around me is shattered.
The darkness that surrounds me unsettles me.
Time never goes forwards or backwards.
Have I lost my mind?
Could it be that this my creation.
I may never know.
I sit with a shattered world surrounding me

Wrong
I am alone, there is no one to love me.
I am hungry, there is no food to feed me.
I am cold, there are no blankets to wrap me in.
I am burnt and weathered, there is no shelter to protect me from the elements.
Why is this so?
I am cursed, I fell in love with the wrong person.

Tears
The tears roll down my face like rain droplets.
Are they tears of joy, sorrow, pain, love, mourning, or are they tears of nothingness.
I continue to shed these tears from the moment of my first breath, to my last goodbye.
As the rain drops continue to fall, so do my tears.

For Him......
How can I believe what you say?
How can my heart open up to you, when I am unsure about these feelings?
What if we are both wrong and really only think we love we each other?
I do not know what to do at this point.
I have ruined friendships and fought with those I love for you.
Is this all a game to you, or was I just someone to rebound with and heal your hurt?
I don't want to know, so I am going to say goodbye before I hurt again.

No Title
My heart still holds onto hope.
My brain screams turn away before you are hurt again.
My dreams profesise our loves demise.
I do not know what path to follow.
Should I love you and hurt when the love is destroyed?
Or do I hurt not loving you, and leave before it is to late?
I am torn with these choices, but light will soon show me the way.

How You Make Me Feel
When I see you, I lose my breath.
When you speak to me, I float on air.
When you smile at me, my world gets brighter.
When it seems like I am at my lowest point, you seem to bring me back up.
When you are not around me, I know that you will be again soon.
I feel so much more alive knowing that I have someone like you.

My cold heart
How can your eyes be so betraying?
You say you love me, but your eyes tell me different.
How can your heart be so cold?
You are never there when I need you the most, and when you are there you break me.
How could I have loved you so much?
I was young and naive, but now I am just like you, cold hearted and unloving.
Are you proud of what you have done?
I am sure karma will get you in the end.

No Title
When feelings are as strong as this, how can you ask me to forget?
I try to look away when I see you with them, but it hurts down in my heart.
If I had only been there first, maybe things would be different.
Alas though, I wasn't and they aren't, I will leave you to your happiness.

 

[Treena Hawkins]

Thank you.
Thank you for being there for me when I was at my lowest.
Thank you for making feel like there was hope for me again.
Thank you for pushing me away before I fell for you even more then I already have.
Thank you for everything you mean to and have done for me.
I think that I love you and before I got hurt you set me free.

The Pain I Feel.
The pain I feel is not your fault.
The pain in my heart is my own doing.
I know you need your time and I will wait.
I just hurt knowing I will have to be so far away from you.
The pain I feel I have been feeling for three years.
You don't need to worry about me.
I will be myself again in time.
The pain will go away and I will heal.

Randomness
I sit here in the darkness waiting for you pull me back up into the light. I sit here in the darkness waiting for you to call me back into the light. I sit here in the darkness waiting for you to see me into the light. I sit here in the darkness waiting for you and the light that you bring.

Pain, anger, broken heart, broken trust, and regret are the feeling I see and feel around me. I do not embrace them though, I fight to keep myself up, for I have friends who surround me with love abd compassion.

I sit.
Sitting in a corner is where I belong.
I am self destructive, through and through.
I thought for once that things would be differnt this time.
Who was I fooling, not anyone it seems.
I did what I am best at, I made you push.
Now I sit in my corner, heart shattered and self destructive.

Goodbye
When I fell, you watched me.
When I rose, you disappeared.
When I was happy, you destroyed me.
When I needed you, I could not find you.
One time I loved you, but you took that for granted.
Now all I want to do is tell you how much you disgust me.
Never again will Ilook at you with loving eyes.
Now all you get are eyes and words of hatred.
Goodbye my former love.

Purpose
Some people say that everyone has a purpose in the world.
A soldier says their purpose is to protect.
A doctor would be to heal,
a grocer would provide,
an actor to entertain.
When I heard this, I wondered why I was here.
I don't have a purpose is what I thought,
then I realized that I do have a purpose.
I protect, I heal, I provide, and I entertain.
I didn't know this until the people that I call my friends showed me.
It seems that even though I didn't know it I serve a purpose for them when I am around them.
No matter how I feel hurt or happy I still serve my purpose for them.
That is my purpose in life and I wouldn't change a thing.

No title.
I walked through a ring of fire for you,
I became a new person when I was with you.
I smiled and was alive again,
you cast a spell of love over my heart,
then you took it back.
I have died since then,
never will I love again.
The magic that held me together was you,
and now that you have left me nothing but a shell,
good bye my deartest for when you search for me
I will be gone and then you will see just how much
of impact you were to this empty shell.

Why me?
How can you love me so after all that I have done to you.
I wasn't myself and I hurt you twice,
and when I ask for redemption expecting you to turn me away,
you suprise me and take me back.
I just wish that the distance between us was shorter,
that way I could hold you close to me.
I am sorry for all the hurt I caused you,
I just hope that this time will be better,
that is why this time I will not say yes until I am sure.​